my 3 yr. old daughter?

Question

my daughter is 3 and i have a 11/2 yr. old and my older daughter tries to be her mom i have sat down and talked to her but when im at school or work she does it even worse as far as correcting her and trying to control what she does like playing and getting around its even to the point that whatever she sees me doing she tries to do the same thing i really dont know what to do i need some advice on how i should try to keep my 3 yr. old 3 instead of going on 30!!! PLEASE HELP!!!!

i have done the doll thing and the stroller and all the real to life things for little girls and she still goes to her sister

Answer 1

It's her age. My daughter is going to be 4 in Nov. My son is 2.5. And my youngest will be 1 in Nov. I've seen all sorts of stages. Awhile ago, she was not only a control freak, but bossy and defiant. It seems that the closer she gets to 4, the more she outgrows it. However, we still are having issues with her changing her clothes. She's been dressing herself since before she turned 2. If she doesn't like something---lord help us. She will change her clothes at least once a day---or as many as 3-4 times a day. When she was younger---it was a mess. Now she knows to hang up her clean clothes...etc. And she is dressing my 2.5 yr old every morning. One time, I removed all her clothes from her drawers. That helped tone down the problem. And if I feel it is getting out of control, I told her I will take her clothes out of her room. I guess my answer doesn't really help---but to let you know that I think for some kids---it's normal to copy their parents. I read that there is a big jump from 3 to 4 yrs old---especially with independence. So, hang in there.

Answer 2

Not a really big problem. At 3, she's role playing for the most part. Don't put the guilt trip on, please. You've got a very busy life with 2 little ones, school and work. She may be telling you she needs more 'mommy alone' time, too. Try ignoring her bossy behavior and instead redirect her to something else when she's being overbearing. As soon as you hear or notice her doing these things, grab crayons and paper and ask her do a picture for you. Praise her highly for finishing whatever project you find for her. Always better to not get too excited over 'naughty' behavior because it'll reinforce their notion that's how to get attention.

Answer 3

Kids do that at that age with a sibling. It's no big deal. Just when she goes too far, explain that you are the mom and that is your job. You may also need to explain how that can make the younger feel, but she likely won't really understand. She's gonna do what she sees others doing. It's just learning. Just keep helping the younger be independent.

Answer 4

Buy her a baby doll , they have some realistic ones that cry and she has to feed it, she can get her own baby stroller and push it around and try to take care of it like a real baby. I suppose it's normal to for her to try to immitate you and care for her baby brother , but obviously she is too young and can't comprehend that she could hurt the baby.

The baby dolls you buy doesn't have to be like the ones I linked but there are many similar, as you can see from the site, some of them you can buy a stroller and accessories such as diaper bag etc. Good luck.

Answer 5

Obviously your daughter looks up to you. I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old. Your daughter is looking after her younger sibling. Honestly, there is nothing wrong with her because she sees you doing it. She does not fully understand yet that raising her younger sibling is not her job. Honestly, she may do this for awhile. My daughter and son behave like each others parents but they do get along and if things do get out of hand, my husband or I are there.

Answer 6

My sister use to mother me when we were little and I absoultuly hated it. The three year old does that out of protection for her little sister. She doesn't realize that she is driving the little one crazy, she thinks she is helping. The oldest one probably also feels like when your not around she has to be the parent because the babysitter doesn't ive with her sister so she doesn't know what the sister needs. [we know better but thats a three year olds logic] Instead of tell the 3yr. old to stop mothering her, find her an alternative. Tell her, that her little sister already has a mommy, but that her sister needs to have a big sister not another mommy. Tell her that instead of being her mommy be her sister. Tell her that mommy will disipline her and sissy can play with her. Give her some differences mommy will do this and sissy can do that. mommy will feed her and sissy and can take baths with her. Mommy will change/dress her and sissy wil___________. things like that. give her alternatives

Answer 7

my daughter will be 3 in september and she's very smart for her age and acts older than a 2 yr old, she does the same thing with the neighbor hood kids older and younger than her! I guess it's a stage they go through!

Answer 8

That is a temporal behaviour. Many children react as their parents when they see them doing parent's stuff. Ask her if her friends doing such a thing, if not, ask her why she doing that. Tell her that when she grow up she would have to do that all the times instead of playing with dolls or hanging up with her friends. Byu her a baby doll and make her playing with it instead with her younger sister.

Answer 9

It's normal at her age to "role play", please don't be too stern with her she is just going through a natural phase. Maybe at this point when she is mimicking you, you could show her kindness, sharing, giving and lots of hugs and kisses. That she can take away with her into her next phase. Good luck and enjoy.

Answer 10

That is very normal between siblings. Your oldest is just like a mother hen. Let her be. She will eventually get tired of taking care of her. Mine did.