Am I wrong to be a fem who only dates other fems?

Question

I am a fem lesbian, and I only date fems.I get a lot of people in the GLBT area telling me this is wrong. A lot of Stud/butches tell me I should only date stud/butch girls. A lot of fems don't understand why I don't date stud/butches. They tell me I must be bi.But I'm not bi. I don't dislike stud/butches, I just don't date them. But I can't help what I'm attracted to. By the way, does anyone know of any fem for fem websites?

I'm from Chicago.

Answer 1

there are a lot of stupid people out there. why would you date smeone you are not attracted to? if you were hetero would you date short fat men because osmeone said you should when actually you were attracted to tall thin men? there are no rules with regards to who you are attracted to where you are gay or straight. you like what you like.

Answer 2

Let me start by answering your question...

NO, you're not wrong by dating only fems. Here in my place, homosexuality is yet being subdivided. If you're a homosexual you gotta be a fem, or a butch, or a bi, gay, straight (which sounds absurd). If you are a fem you either gotta date with a butch or a "soft butch". They find it "wrong" if you date with a fem not thinking that being a lesbian doesn't mean that there should be this someone who would act out as a "guy". That's basically the reason why I am a lesbian because I love girls and not "guys" nor those girls-who-wants-to-be-a-guy. But hey, I don't have anything with butches. What my point here is that, we have our own opinion, we have our own choices to make, so I just hope people would understand that. Besides, its our life, isn't it?

Answer 3

Don't let them tell you anything like that! I am very, very fem. People think I'm straight, I'm that fem. I really like girls that are as fem as I am. It doesn't mean I wouldn't date a very butch girl, but she would have to be really special. I have been attracted to a couple of butch girls, but they were really pretty. Like if they were fem they would be totally hot. You know the type. Anyway, back to your question.......there is not one thing wrong with fem with fem. Be with who you want to be with period. It was hard enough to come out, you don't need people telling you which type of girls to date too. It just seems to be another kind of discrimination to me.

Answer 4

I am a fem or loves fem only. I have butch/transmen for friends and none of them have told this before. You know what ever makes you happy, enjoy it. You probably have stud/butches in your life who are trying to hook up with you. Don't assume that everyone thinks alike.

Answer 5

I don't think you are wrong in what you want. After all its what you are attracted to right? If I wanted a man, I would go for a man, not some woman who looks like a man, though I admit some don't look bad. I don't know of any website names right off hand that specifically cater to fem for fem, but try curiouslove.com or grrl2grrl.com.

Answer 6

STOP LETTING THE PRESSURE GET TO YOU>

IT IS YOUR CHOICE TO BE STRONG SO JUST GO FOR IT

YOU ARE WHO YOUR ARE.

yes, your new second hom butch-femme.com

you dont know what you were missing.

Its butch-femme, also others varieties, you will learn alot about genders too. A great community.

Personally, I am soft butch who likes tombo femmes, soft butch, or other butches.

everyones different it comes down to who you are attracted too (the energy) and really how much masculine and feminine in a person.

i am a really femme looking- feminine looking, but I feel so out of place looking just that- i am muscular naturally though so i am careful what i wair to feel good about myself.

Answer 7

I am a stud, that only dates femmes. I know ALOT of femme women that only date femme women. I am not gonna lie, it used to bother me. I was really confused because alot of femmes always say if they wanted to be with a man they would be with a man, not really giving studs/butches a chance. But I am with a femme that LOVES that I am a stud and can protect her and take care of her. (And she doesnt have to compete for the mirror!) Baby girl you are attracted to who you are attracted to and you shouldnt feel bad for that. Me, I would never date another stud, but thats just my personal preference. When we go shopping my girl uses me as her personal bag holder, and I dont mind at all. So dont think all studs and butches are haters. We really arent.

Answer 8

You're not wrong. No one has the right to tell you who they think you should date. Your dating only fems doesn't make you bi either, it's just what you like and people need to respect you as you are.

Answer 9

It's not wrong to date femmes. And I totally understand why you don't date butches. Again, there's nothing wrong with it.

Don't let other people change how you feel. It's true what they say, be true to yourself. Being lesbian is loving or having feelings for the person with the same gender.

God bless! Enjoy life!

Answer 10

look just because you're a lesbian doesn't mean you can't date a fem. you can date whoever you want to. You became a lesbian because you're attracted to women. It doesn't matter what kind but as long as you are happy with that person. Tell everyone else to mind their own buisness (in a polite way of course)

Answer 11

Nope. i'm enormously fem. My spouse's a tomboy ( & relatively all lady!) who's laid lower back & attire in athletic kit. yet, each guy or woman is different in what they like/dislike interior the mattress room. Lesbians (be they butch or fem) are no longer any different. I relatively have butch friends who appreciate receiving the strap on the hands of their fem or butch gf, & some fems who're stone & do no longer go with to be touched in any respect. different strokes for various individuals (no pun meant!) i'm no longer the strap-on receiving type, yet that's only me. My lady does not like utilising them, so it relatively works out nicely for us.