I feel so helpless...?

Question

I'm 17 years old and I am a daddy to a beautiful baby girl, and I'm now engaged to her mommy, she's the love of mylife.

Well... my daughter, wasn't born very strong and we have to be careful with her. She just broke a high fever and she misses her mommy. You see, her mom[my fiancee] is sick right now, and I am petrified to bring my daughter near her mom. If she gets sick.. god only knows.

She won't stop crying, she's not colicky, and she isn't teething, she misses her mommy.

How can I help my 5 month old beauty?

Answer 1

Just hold her and comfort her. Make sure she isn't hungry or wet and just tend to her basic needs. Keep a watch over her to make sure she doesn't get another fever and also keep a watch over your fiance - if she is very sick it might be best for her to go to the doctor to make sure that it isn't anything she may need antibiotics for.

Answer 2

What exactly is your fiancee sick with? I answered your question late last week about your daughter and her fever, and you said then that your fiancee was sick. Is it something horribly contagious, or just a cold? If it's just a cold, your daughter could very well have gotten sick from your fiancee (hence, her fever). If this is the case, more than likely enough time has passed and your fiancee probably isn't very contagious any more (most people are most contagious at the onset of an illness). Assuming your fiancee doesn't have an illness that would potentially make your daughter incredibly sick or even kill her, I would imagine it's OK for your fiancee to hold her daughter and play with her for a bit. Just make sure she scrubs her hands really well, changes her shirt, doesn't sneeze or cough on her. It might not be a bad idea to take her to a different room or even outside in the shade to do this. If your fiancee has been in your bedroom for the last week with the windows shut, the room is a haven for germs.

Answer 3

Why couldn't we all get a "man" like you. You are way ahead of yourself in age. My husband is 43 and can't stand to hear a baby cry. It drives him nuts. You have been put into a position that is not easy. Do what others are telling you. Hold her, sing to her, touch her arms and her face, and just relax. If you know that there's nothing physically wrong with her. Just sit back in a reclined seat, and place her on her stomache facing you on your chest and just relax- take a deep breath and relax-hum, sing, talk quietly to her, anything that mommy would do, or if you know their habits, and how she held her and talked to her. You could even get some of her clothes that have her smell on them, and lay them on you and then the baby. You'd be surprised by what they relate to. She's just a mommy's girl right now and I agree with the other person who said to take advantage of this time to get closer to your daughter. It will be your greatest accomplishment! Your probably not getting alot of sleep, so take naps with her, just like mommy would do to recouperate form the loss of sleep. I'm really proud of you keep up the good work, and if you need a break, like we all do, you need to find someone to help out a little. It's o.k. to be away from her for awile.

Answer 4

Try a trip outdoors. A ride in the stroller or even a short drive in the car can sometimes distract and soothe one her age. Just keep loving her, keep being proud of her, don't loose your patience, and everything will be ok. You didn't mention any grandparents, but if you or your fiance' has a mom that's nearby, grandmas are sometimes a good resource (or aunts or close firends) You are obviously a great dad, but it's never a bad thing to ask for help, and the baby might just like a change of scenery. Hang in there!!

Answer 5

Walk or dance with the baby, or try rocking her. If that doesn't work, try to take the baby for a ride in her baby carriage or in the car. Sometimes a massage can do wonders too. go into a semi dark room, remove all accesories like your watch, ring etc, and play some soothing music. Get some baby lotion, and warm it by rubbing between your palms. gently press babies limbs...sometimes all a child needs is to be physically close to her parent...good luck!

Answer 6

One of the best things you can do for your little gal is to keep yourself nice and calm. Babies cry. Don't worry. Just do the things that normally help her stay happy. Give her lots of chances to eat, keep her nice and dry, and she just might be fussy because she's tired. So if she's been cry for a long time and you're getting frustrated, try putting her in her crib and shutting the door for awhile (keep checking in on her every few minutes if you need to). She may just fall asleep. Babies are really good at crying themselves tired. Good luck and I hope your fiancee starts to feel better.

Answer 7

Try distracting her with "peekaboo". It's a good way to help her learn that just because you can't see someone doesn't mean they don't exist. If she likes baths, this may be a good way to help her calm down. I used to give my kids a bath in the bathroom or kitchen sink, its a lot easier on your back than to have her in the bathtub and she may like splashing and playing in the water.

Some babies also like the movement of dance. Put some gentle music on and move around with her, holding her close to your chest.

Hope your fiance is on the mend soon

Answer 8

Well certainly you have to protect that little baby at all costs. she is still just getting used to life outside the womb and being away from mommy is a very big deal to her. You are just going to have to be patient and comfort her as much as you can until your fiancee is better. Trust me, when my son was 5months I had to have surgery and be at the hospital for three days. His daddy called me plenty just so I could talk to my son on the phone to calm him down. It will be ok. patience is the key.

Answer 9

try singing to her. kids love the sound of their parents voice, especially mom. u could ask ur fiancee to make a tape of her reading a book, or singing a song, or just talking. then u can play it back for her so she can hear her voice. have u talked to her about how u feel bringing ur daughter around her since she is sick? im sure if u explain it she would be more then willing to spend the time talking to a tape recorder, or talking to her on a speakphone.

Answer 10

get a baby backpack to carry your daughter in... let her go about the hoouse as you do your thing
maybe get a bit of extra help so you can also help your partner...
only do things that are important around the house and everything else will just have to wait
keep talking to her and playng with her...
make sure she is clean and fed and try to maintani her routine during this time
if her routine is different babies can sometimes get unsettled
maybe your parner can wear a mask so she doesnt spread any disease and have a cuddle in the evenings... maybe your daghter would just love to lay next to her and smell her...
if this is a stressful time for you try and get some help as sometimes children can sense stress and react to it
have afternoon sleeps with her laying next to you and use this time to bond with your daughter