I am 30 and my boyfriend is 31 we have sex like 2ce a month maby...iour realtionship has been on and off for 13 yrs with other realtionships in between...when we were younger we did it so much, and he was good at it ,,now it's hardly ever and he dosnt care about getting me off, I cry allot cause i feel so ugly, and i just dont know what to do.He loves it when we do " do it" but he just has no drive and he sux in bed now...I never hear of the guy not wanting to do it, it's always the other way around :(
2006-08-06 15:05:31 · 13 answers · asked by summer 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Maybe stress and other things have caused him to lose his drive. I read about this and the older you get the more volatile a dude's sex drive is to the things around him.
I imagine there must be a way to tell him & help him get his drive back. If you don't think that it is his drive, do some other stuff (experiment) to get things spiced up a bit. Its not you though! And I don't think he is cheating. Be confident with yourself and make it your goal to get back to humpin like rabbits.
2006-08-06 15:17:09 · answer #1 · answered by ZIAGACITY 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people might say that if he isn't getting it at home that means HE IS GETTING IT SOMEWHERE ELSE. That is NOT ALWAYS TRUE! Maybe he has become comfortable in the relationship. He might not see your needs as important. He gets his nut and he's done. I know aggravating. Does he work a lot? Does he work odd hours? Does he work in the heat? Men (and women) who work in those conditions are tired and feel little drive to do anything. I suggest sitting down and talking with him. Tell him how special sex is to you, and that it is important for you to be satisfied. He might have some concerns. Only you know how to approach it with him, but I think you should at least try. You might be surprised. Something else you might take into consideration... Men and women have different sex drives and they peak at different times in life. Some say men peak younger than women, but I think some have more than ONE peak. I know it can be frustrating so just try to talk to him. GET FREAKY - try spicing it up between you and your man! What turned my husband on 17 years ago does not turn him on now. What keeps it interesting is staying in touch with each others feelings and communication. We had our rough times too, and that is when we learned about communication!
2006-08-07 10:02:51 · answer #2 · answered by pottersclay70 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am 29 and my husband is 27. We've been married for a little over a year and are now expecting a little one! We have sex on average of 3 times a day. I know that sounds a bit much, but it's what works for us and we really enjoy it. There are times one of us may not be that into it, but if the other has needs we give in and before you know it we are both enjoying.
2016-03-27 01:38:33 · answer #3 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey, I feel your pain. At least part of it. My husband's libido is lower than mine, and when he's stressed, sex gets even rarer. Is your relationship okay otherwise? If so, learn to get yourself off during the times when he's not in the mood and enjoy the times you have together when he is. I found a nice "halfway point" that way. By masturbating and getting myself off on a regular basis, I'm much less upset when he's not in the mood (again). In fact, I've bought some toys and I've taken to looking at it as "me" time that sometimes I actually look forward to.
But believe it or not, that's very normal. Women have their sexual peaks in the 30's, men have theirs in the 20's (college age). So my husband is starting to slow down, but I'm just starting to get going.
2006-08-06 15:14:21 · answer #4 · answered by I'm just me 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well don't leave him yet. He is a winner-player and they are the kind of males you like. You will have to learn their ways and vocabulary if you want to avoid depression or take medication and be a slave-like partner . For starters find a new friend and search spirit-wife on line.
2006-08-07 18:07:49 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's completly normal to have a lower sex drive after being with someone for so long. Maybe you can try some new toys or role playing to make it fun again.
2006-08-06 15:14:45 · answer #6 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like time for you to move on. The 30's is a womans sexual peak. GO RIDE THE WAVES GIRL, dont be sitting on the beach with sand in your ***!
2006-08-06 15:14:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to therapy with him. Take him to a doctor. If he's not willing to work on fixing the problem, dump him. Sex isn't everything, but it's still important.
2006-08-06 15:11:07 · answer #8 · answered by Kanga_tush2 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
time to move on while your still young and have many choices.It want improve ,so seek out a more compatible mate.
2006-08-06 15:14:27 · answer #9 · answered by deltech 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
thats cus hes getting humped else where
2006-08-06 15:11:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋