This isnt good -?

Question

Started thinking about old love and realised how he and my two other loves hurt me. Whats worst is I was thinking about trying to find him - got even physical scars from all of them - whats wrong with me - be kind I'm upset

Answer 1

ur just lonely so u need to stop n move on

Answer 2

Oh dear! Sounds like you're suffering from "anything's better than nothing" Syndrome. Well, I'm here to tell you it's not!! If these people disrespected you last time they will do it again because there is familiarity involved. Plus the fact that you seem to be thinking along the lines of seeking them out. What an ego booster that would be to their male pride! Leave them in the past where they belong! .... learn from the experiences that they put you through and just try to be content for now. If you go out ernestly looking for someone to fill their shoes you will appear desperate...... a real "green light" signal to another prospective bullies. That's the last thing you need. Try to build up your own self esteem, take up a hobbie or pastime that is interesting and PURELY for you. If you manage to occupy yourself, you may even find that Mr right will home in on you.... when you least expect it!! Be content with what you have and BE HAPPY!

Answer 3

It's normal to think about someone like that. When you get lonely, you get nostalgic, even if the relationship was bad. And if they all hurt you, then this is all you've ever known. But you don't need that, either. You need to try dating someone new, and find out what it's like to be with a REAL man. There are so many millions of men in America, don't settle for someone that hurts you. You could get killed in the end, and then where would your friends and family be? Just go on a few dates with other guys.... You'll feel those old feelings start to disappear.

Answer 4

Sweetheart, nothing is wrong with you. When you have opened your heart and loved someone and let them in, it's totally natural to miss them from time to time. Remember though that there was a reason why things ended. And from the sounds of it, seems to have been unhealthy and violent.

Its totally okay to miss them and even want them back, you're probably doing this because your only thinking of the good times and not the overal reality of this destructive relationship.

Hold on to the good memories and the bad ones, well ask yourself what lessons could you learn from the bad stuff that went down. You may cry from time to time as you recolect and that's fine, just be careful and dont act upon them.

Wipe your tears, be brave, ask for courage and wisdome to make better decisions next time around. Let the power of God's grace restore you.

You'll be fine sweetheart, take care.

Annette

Answer 5

Well the smart thing to do is to put the past in the past, by looking him up, it could cause even more problems for you, and u'd end up right were u finally got urself out of, start thinking about how much he hurt you, physically , how u felt in that moment.. the pain, the hurt, the fear.. and build strength from that to know he has issues and ur stronger then to put urself in that spot again.. so just leave the past in the past, im thinking 1 of two things, 1. your lonely and u are willing to fill that void at any cost , and 2. u have some false hope of thinking that either u'll get some kind of satisfaction of letting them know that u are much better now, (closure) or hopes that maybe they have changed.. which they havent.. So just know tomorrow is another day, and just move on away from your past, protect urself.. from the fate that almost doomed u..

Answer 6

Just thinking about the past is all. Trying to remember the "good" in it, instead of the bad. The physical scars will bring you back to reality. Make sure you stay there and you don't move backwards.

Answer 7

If you're feeling down at the moment, it's easy to look back on past events and distort them into being happier times.

DON'T try to find him. Concentrate on who you are now, and what you need to be happy.

I know where you're coming from - I've been there. Once you have happiness in your life again, you'll forget all about him again.

Things will get better - promise.

Answer 8

Youre lonely and vulnerable, find someone new who will treat you like his queen and love you and be kind to you. I think of the story in the bible of the israelites who were set free, but they were used to living as slaves =- and prefered it, they didnt know abny better, you need someone who will treat you so well that you'll never want to be with anyone who will hurt you as youll be able to tell the difference.

Answer 9

The very same thing happened to a lady friend of mine a couple of years back, i did some comforting, and told her to get on with her life, she met a, how can i say, a large man (fat) they are together now, and soooooooo in love, she's over the moon, yes there is life after what you have gone through, good luck in your quest. MOVE ON.

Answer 10

i know what you talking about cause ive been through it. and its hard. i was with him for a long time and all he did was cheat and beat me. and i got tired send him to jail. he still call me saying that he loves me.but i know hes just trying to have someone to control.and he knows im scared of him. hell im a woman and he is a state champ in wrestling.of course im scared. right now im interested in someone and he feels the same. im thinking about starting a new life without him.and you shoulld think the same way about your ex.theres no way that a woman should be treated like trash, just because a man is stronger and can hurt us bad. we women are better than that.

Answer 11

Unfortunately love and I don't mean to be unkind but there is a very famous saying - "you should keep a woman well fcuked and poorly shod - and what you have just said - sort of proves that saying right - do you understand what I mean - don't be a victim !!! Move on !