please help my husband of three years walked out i'm lost?

Question

i married for love i took care of my family and now i'm slapped in the face with him leaving now he has a good job i'm hurt and angry i met a nice older man and he interested in my kids should i go on i know i deserve better but my feeling are in termoil i know my husband doesnt want me i feel like a failure please someone help.

Answer 1

Lisa, right now your hurting so please don't make any decisions about another man. This older man is nice to be interested in your kids but for how long? You need time to heal and grieve the lost of your husband. Don't do anything that you will regret later. I know it is hard but you can do this without the help of another man. Your not a failure, he walked out for reasons only you and he know, so don't allow yourself to feel it is your fault.

Answer 2

Do yourself a favor. First, relax and get a hold of yourself. This is going to be a long, messy haul. Get a book called, "HE's JUST NOT THAT IN TO YOU". Read it, and find the strength to move on. Also, DO NOT get involved with anything else until you have resolved other issues. No one likes baggage, and you will certainly be bringing issues with you to future relations. Finish what you've started, and then take some time to reconnect with yourself. If the other person is truly interested, they'll wait for you. Have the respect for yourself, and the other person, by not doing anything until you are free. You will feel much better about it later. Things always tend to haunt us when we least expect it, so be careful.

Answer 3

Your feelings are perfectly normal and reasonable. Your husband has decided to move on without you. It is natural for you to feel abandoned, betrayed, and alone. It would be a little strange if you didn't.

Find an attorney. Get the divorce underway. If he cheated on you get as much of the marital property as you can. Get possession of the residence and custody of the children.

As soon as you can, establish a comfortable routine and make the children feel safe and loved.

See a therapist to help you deal with your feelings. Once you have healed, see if that "nice older man" is as interested in you as he is in the children.

Good Luck. Be Strong. Stay Well.

Answer 4

you need to talk to a counselor and fast. but before you pick up that phone, get down on your knees and ask God to help you through this difficult situation. don't assume anything. i don't know all the details, but another man will never love your babies like their real father does. other man will say anything sometimes just to be with you. a marriage is a terrible thing to waste. years and family mean a lot. try outside source first. can you live with yourself if you don't at least call someone. if money is an issue there is free help through most city's health department and social services can guide you. Remember pray first then go from there.

Answer 5

My advice to you would be to learn to depend on yourself. The new older man in your life is temping, but until you get over the feeling of failure, you might be setting yourself up for another one. A rebound relationship is hard to make work......just be careful. How about going back to school to build a career? Is that possible? You need to get back your self esteem so that you can truly feel that you are more worthy than what you were getting out of the relationship that you were in. It's okay to be alone with yourself, as long as you like yourself. Work on that...it's a hard one, but it's soooo worth it in the end.

Answer 6

hang in there! as someone who also experienced the pain of divorce (and understands you really DON'T want to hear this now) but it gets better... as far as this "older man" who's interested in your kids - realize that though it may seem helpful now, it can't be the reason to be involved with someone. take your time, be gentle with yourself, and don't rush into anything - you need time for yourself, to rejuvenate, rediscover, and strengthen before you get into a new relationship. in regards to feeling like a failure - i know just how you feel, but remember, you didn't fail - he did! he failed to uphold his commitment to you and your family. believe me, someday, you will look back at this decision of his and be thankful because your life will be better than then it ever was with him. you deserve the very best and right now that's YOU! good luck, keep your head up

Answer 7

I tolded Everyone when my ex leftMe for another woman . It would have been easier if he had died . Then I could tell myself I know I was loved. my ex loved one person himself it took me two year before I would even let a men even talk to me . I build alot of walls there I hurt so bad I called &talk to my best friend &cryed &CRYED it was 5 years later i had seen 1men one night nosex 1 men for a 1 only when he want too. So what I'm saying the Faster you can move on may be you want do like I did I thought I would gater be along than with the wrong men . i miss out on may mr right who knows .

Answer 8

Find in the telephone book Department of Vocational Rehabilitation and set up an appointment. Forget other men right now. Feed, house the kids first. DVR will point the way to a great career, housing, school and kid help. go for it.

Answer 9

here is the 1st step, breathe in deeply do this 5 cases and loosen up. help communities are sturdy yet you actual would desire to "google" for an area psychologist. explanation why is conversing approximately your grief is the 1st actual step to healing. explanation why the melancholy is so heavy on you nicely suited now's in view which you would be able to desire to get it out s usually as attainable. nevertheless you would be able to refute anti-depressants, they're effective and would assist you loosen up, sleep or perhaps shed pounds besides. back your husband's passing is hurting you extra. He would choose you to seek for counseling and no you're no longer loopy, in simple terms deeply careworn. hear, please seek for some scientific help for the sake of you daughter too. She desires her Mommy...back this would be a technique, yet you would be able to desire to take the 1st step. in case you choose some help, ask a depended on or clergy. See ma'am, help is in basic terms a decision away. Google for an area grief counseling and you're then waiting to narrow your seek. Please do this reason the formerly you get the assist you choose, the extra effective you will experience. Your husband is asserting, "honey look after your self"... God bless you and back take 5 deep breathes, loosen up, relate and launch and seek for help. i would be praying for you and the each thing would be high-quality. have faith and circulate forward. you could win and could win!!!!!!!!

Answer 10

If your husband has such a low character to walk out you are better off without him. Also watch out for men that are interested in your kids. A lot of men pretend to be interested in women in order to get to the kids. Put your kids first. Raise them and forget about dating until they are raised. Go to an attorney and get your child support.