I landed on Earth two months ago.I am from the planet that you call Saturn.I need help...?

Question

I found that nothing works on your world without your money.Can anyone help me to get through three more months on this planet?I have needs,like you all.Your planet is fun,but only if you have this money.It's so different from mine.

Answer 1

You are going to have to go to the unemployment office, that is the only way your going to get a hand out

Answer 2

Well on my planet most people work, but this is the really slow way to get money. You have save and earn interest and things like that. Let me tell you the fast way to get money space boy. Go to one of our facilities called a bank, a heavily guarded one preferably, maybe one on a military base. Take the weapon of your choice (gun, knife, even a metal pipe seeing that you are what we call strapped for cash). Go to the first teller you can and tell her to give you all the money. She will gladly comply with your request. But you will have to exit the facility swiftly because the guards will try to stop you. They are just trying to keep you from having any money. Make sure to resist them at all costs. Find a nice hiding place, "lay low" for a couple of days, and then go to a foreign country. There you can have all the fun you want.

P.S. If the guards catch you they will take your newly gained wealth and then take you somewhere you will have a very different type of fun. But it will be free.

Answer 3

I'll sign over all my money if you can tell me how a creature that evoloves on a planet wiht no solid surface and a temperature that varies from 167 degrees to -200 (celsius) and has a gravitational pull 74% of that of Earth could survive here.

And please include specifications for your craft - seeing as Saturn has no solid metal deposites, what is it made of? And for that matter, what are YOU made of? If you evolved on Saturn you more than likely can't breathe here - what are you based on if not the good old terrian Oxy/Carbon mix?

Oh.. wait... I know what you are - and very poor troll or an even weaker idiot. Come up with better humor for your next play time.

Answer 4

First you have to get what we, here, call a job. That's where we subject ourselves to the slavery of the man. The Man BTW, is the hypothetical being that is the reason for all the mishaps of the earth. Might i mention that we have a secret society dedicated entirely to bringing down The Man. Members of this are called Anarchists. Well, forget that... next, as a result of your job, you get money that is inversely proportional to the amount of work you do. I suggest being a "butt-monkey" all you have to do is to kiss The Man's butt and he gives you stuff. That's pretty much it.

Answer 5

Well it is an innovative new twist to the begging letter hustle. Don't you find Earth a bit warm for you, commpared to your home planet? Don't you find our atmosphere difficult to breathe? Have you visited NASA yet and told them about Saturn? Don't you think you should? If what you say is true, I am sure they would feed you and house you for 3 months in return for your first-hand knowledge about Saturn. It would be mean of them not to.

Answer 6

Surely if you have the abilty of interplanetary travel you can figure out a simple survival issue like money!

Didn't you get any training before you left Saturn?

Answer 7

Use your amazing mental powers to pick the winning lottery numbers in the Power Ball lottery. You will have enough to last you 3 months.

Answer 8

Call the National Enquirer and sell your story. For being here 2 months you don't know much, do you?

Answer 9

I have the same problem. Only thing is that I come from the Galactic Nebula. Do you have Luke Skywalker's autograph?

Answer 10

Go to yahoo auction to sell all the rocks you have from Saturn.