This Question is for all the Military wives....?

Question

my husband is enlisting in the army. he says it's the best thing he can do for his family and for his country. i can't argue with that, but secretly i have reservations. i'm scared for his safety. i'm scared that our 11 month old child will miss out on having a father in his life when my husband is serving overseas. i'm scared we will get stationed somewhere far from my family and i'll be all alone, not knowing anyone. how is life living in military housing? are other military wives really as supportive as everyone says? are the rewards worth the risks and sacrifises of being a military family? can some of you with experience answer some of the questions and set my mind at ease. don't get me wrong, i am proud of my husband for stepping up and serving this country and outwardly i will be strong for him and my son. but...inwardly i'm just a little nervouse

Answer 1

First of all, welcome to the military community. I am an Army wife. My husband is been in the military longer than we have known each other. After completing college he decided to go back into active duty. I have never lived more than a couple hours from my family, and my family and I (especially my mom) are really close. Before we left I literally had a panic attach, and went to the hospital.
I can't tell you about housing very much except some bases housing is better than others, we live off post. About the wives, I can tell you this. Join the FRG (family readiness group), and don't just go to one FRG or two FRG functions keep going it gets better. At first for me it was hard to get to know the other wives, but I kept going to different functions and volunteering my time, and now I have a few good friends here. I just kept telling myself that I am only going to get out of this what I put into it. Also the FRG leaders are not going to make you go to things and are not going to push you to go. They tell you, "hey we have a social this day at this time" they will not hold your hand or pursued you to go. You just have to go yourself even if you know anybody. Work when you can, you will met people their as well, most Daycare on base have rates depending on your income, and also they have an hourly program. For instance I take my son to the hourly program, I can have him there for a total of 25hr a week and I pay 3.50 an hour, which that may very depending on the base but I am not sure, here that is the highest anyone can pay for hourly care. Take advantage of it, and register your son with them. I have been lucky so far, and have not been through a deployment, my husband was supposed to be going over seas this fall but do to a back injury he his staying back, and our FRG is doing so many things for each other. Also if you get a chance to talk and socialize with the Battalian commanders wife do. Just because there husband are usually colonels don't let their rank scare you, military wives wear no rank. Ok to be honest you will run into some wives that think just because there husband is a caption or other high ranking soldier, and yours is a private they are better, but thats not true at all.
So I guess what I am saying is: put your best foot forward, support your hubby and get involved with things on post.
Good luck, hope your first duty station is wonderful!

Answer 2

Well all your fears are rational ones. Your husband will likely miss a lot of your child's growing up, and you will probably be stationed far from family. Soon your "vacations" will be going home. I can't say what Army housing is like, but I have heard that they are worse than the Air Force, and that isn't saying a whole lot. the good thing is is you can live off base instead. There are many many programs and groups for you and your family to help make life a little easier. There are spouse groups, Family Support center (I'm not sure if it's called the same thing in the Army) and they can help you find employment, and have a wide variety of classes offering things such as smooth move (since you'll be doing that a lot). The military life is what YOU make of it. If you are always saying "woe is me", you'll be miserable, but if you get out there and volunteer and meet people and take advantage of a ll the perks/benefits, you have a lot of fun and get to see so many new things! Enjoy and relax :)

Answer 3

My husband is active duty army also. It will get lonely sometimes. I'm not going to lie to you. Your husband will probably miss out on a lot with your children. You won't have much control where you get stationed depending on his MOS (job) If you do get the option to live off of the base do it. Army housing is livable but not the greatest. The army has a lot of support groups. Each unit has a family support group that will be great. You will be able to rely on them if you need anything. The army is really good about that. All the women know exactly what you are going through and can guide you through any problems. They are very knowledgeable. I'm proud to be the wife of an army soldier. You will worry about him. It's natural. But there is enough support for you. You will also make good friends. I'm not going to tell you it isn't tough or lonely at times. But hundreds of thousands of families do it every day. My husband has been in the army for 16 years, since he graduated high school. I've been an army wife for 12 years. I hope I have helped you a little bit. God bless.

Answer 4

Indeed the better halves who're devoted to their husbands once they move off for accelerated durations of time are to be incredibly recommended. The susceptible ones will cheat on their husbands once they get lonely. God bless each the navy husbands/better halves and their provider for his or her nation. And do not concentrate to the superliberal democrats - the navy is an excessively noble group and the ones worried are quality folks. I am very glad to look that now not all ladies are slutty, "handy" ladies and that a few nonetheless take relationships significantly critical.

Answer 5

Tell him to go Air Force instead of Army. The AF only has 4 month deployments where as the Army has 12 month deployments. That and the housing in the AF is 1000x better than the army housing. (that is if you live on base). In the AF, they'd pay your rent and utilities to live off base...........