Like say your family don't get along and you talk to everyone in your family so each week a different part of the family is mad at u bc u talked to this part and not that part! is thier ever a time your family is happy and not fighting over something stupid and your the one always stuck in the middle?
2006-08-05 16:12:08 · 22 answers · asked by lildevil522 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
families run off of insinuations and unspoken rules.
back out of this and rise above it.
2006-08-05 16:15:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow...sorry...some families are not happy unless they are arguing and miserable. I know I came from one of those families and it has taken me a long time to realize that it wasn't me that was messed up. The best advice I can give you is to not get involved or sucked into their problems. Sometimes people will say things to you just to make you angry, so you will also react in anger towards them, now they have their fight. If you do not react in anger, then they have no fight and neither do you. When they get in your face or make accusations, DO NOT DEFEND YOURSELF OR MAKE EXCUSES. Just say "I am sorry you feel that way" and move on to the next subject or leave the room. Or end the phone conversation. "I can't talk right now". No one has to put up with anger or misery. I know family is important, but not at the expense of your happiness. Good Luck
2006-08-05 16:21:30 · answer #2 · answered by Annie R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're allowing yourself to continuously get wrapped up into petty bickering, that you know is pointless. As long as you continue to participate in it in some way, things are going to continue like they have.
It can be tough, especially when family is involved, but if you don't want to be stuck in the middle then stop getting in the middle. When people begin talking about something that is going to get you caught up in the matter, change the subject, ignore the conversation, or just leave. When they start asking about your new behavior, tell them all the truth, that you're tired of the drama they constantly create about things that really don't matter. And you don't want to continue to waste your time trying to keep the peace, when you're dealing with people that apparently don't want to get along.
2006-08-05 16:25:54 · answer #3 · answered by B_O_C_K_S_C_A_R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best you can do is to maintain contact with all of the family. Your relationship with each one is up to you. It may be difficult at times but in the end you may be the one who helps the other start talking to each other again. Just try not to take sides no matter what you may think. Neutral is the best position if possible.
2006-08-05 16:24:43 · answer #4 · answered by Thomas C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some reason, we sometimes percieve ourselves as the root cause of problems in our family. You work very hard to please every one, and in the end, it seems to back-fire and that you have pleased no one.
It's easy to feel negative and turn that negativity on yourself. I've felt bad to the point of feeling worthless in the context of my family. And that resulted in some pretty negative actions on my part.
Anyways, in the end, I found that by coming to view myself as a strong person independent of my family, then I felt much better with my role in the family.
It's not an easy process, and anyone who tells you it is, well, there probably lying or have a great family.
Take your time, give yourself a break, and treat yourself well.
'bye.
2006-08-05 16:27:23 · answer #5 · answered by pezdispenserwisdom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen, you can only do so much. Don't let people make you feel guilty. To every problem there is a solution. I'm sure your trying to be the solution,but if it keeps back-firing then step back and let the immature deal with their selves,you tried!All you can do is be an example so they can see what you mean.You are powerless over other people but if we show by example then they get it without being personally offended.
2006-08-05 16:18:05 · answer #6 · answered by blondearies123 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To bad you can't choose your family like you choose your friends. What you should do is stay out of their problems. Only talk to them about positive things and never talk about the negative stuff. If they ask you about things you guys fight about just say I take the fifth on that subject, because you always blame me for everything that goes wrong.
2006-08-05 16:21:36 · answer #7 · answered by 4wheelerdude 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My family gets along great, we have a problem with another family memeber then we get it out in the open and resolve it. Too many people would rather just talk behind your back and continue to feed a problem rather then resolve it
2006-08-05 16:16:35 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, there's not. I'm 27 and still have the same problem with my parents. At some point you'll realize that they're nuts, and there's not much you can do to change it. Just try to be nice & agreeable with everyone. Good luck...I feel your pain!
2006-08-05 16:17:17 · answer #9 · answered by Ashley F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Relax if your the one stuck in the middle. Just ignore them both because you are neither the cause or the solution. Have a good day.
2006-08-05 16:15:57 · answer #10 · answered by zeus_daughter2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, but in my years I have learned to live with it because there are worse people to be like than me. Everyone in my family looks down heir nose at me, but the children in my family adore me and that's better then anyone else's approval.
2006-08-05 16:16:15 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋