Should I break up with my boyfriend because of lack of confidence in myself?

Question

I have trouble feeling sexy or beautiful with myself let alone with him. I don't see what he sees in me. Some days I avoid seeing him because I don't want him to see how ugly and fat I am/feel. He doesn't realize this, but it's tearing me up inside, and I think I should get out of the relationship for this. Is this not a legit reason? Any advice on what to do to help myself/relationship?

Answer 1

If yall are really close you may consider talking to him about it. Also go to counseling. You won't ever be happy with any guy until you get this issue resolved so ditching him is just going to make it so you aren't faced with it as often , but the problem will arise again with future boyfriends. So don't ditch him, fix your problem some how.

Answer 2

He's with you so obviously there must be something in you that he likes but that you do not see. Try asking him why he likes you and you telling him why you like him. If you get out of this relationship because you dont have any confidence then what will happen in your next relationship? Will you have any confidence then? Will you break up your next relationship? Talk to your boyfriend, if he really loves you, he will help you build your confidence and both of you will grow together. It is obvious you are not 'ugly and fat' in his eyes, he's together with you, so he may think you're an angel! Hope you guys can work this out.

Answer 3

u need 2 tell ur boyfriend about ur insecurities and u also need 2 face them.. i am the same as u but if u split up with him the problem wil stil b there unitl u resolve it in ur own head.. he must think u r beautiful or he wudnt b with u u wil hav hang ups til u sort them out and every time u go into a relationship u wil hav the same problems.. maybe worth a visit 2 ur doctor and ask 2 get some counselling 4 ur low self esteem.. it has taken me a long time 2 realise that i cant change who i am or wot my body looks like and not one person is perfect and if u meet the right person 4 u then they wil love u 4 who u r and wot u r and wot u look like.... so just learn 2 love youself as he obviously thinks alot of u and wudnt want 2 change u in any way ok so stop beatin youself up about it and enjoy ot u hav with him or u wil destroy the relationship and every other one that comes along ..

Answer 4

Having high self esteem and confidence in onself isn't something that someone can give to us. You have to find ways to make yourself feel better about yourself, beauty shines from the inside out and no one can make you believe and accept that beside you. Try doing things that would build your self esteem, if you have a problem with your weight, then join a gym, watch what you eat, do whatever it takes to improve you as a person.
If your boyfriend loves you, then he is seeing what's in your heart and not what is on the outside. Appreciate and love him for loving you, and start working on feeling better about yourself. Start with saying positive affirmations to yourself and don't just say it but believe what you are saying. You could discuss what you are feeling with your boyfriend and if he really loves you, he would be supportive and encourage you in what ever ways he can. Be true to who you are, you are god's creation and god never makes a mistake, you are here for a reason and a purpose.

Answer 5

Gosh, Criss... it sounds like you feel a need to punish yourself for something. If he's your boyfriend he apparently sees more in you than you see in yourself.

Let me say this, you write better than most people who use this forum so I think you're probably better educated and smarter than the average user. Keep THAT in mind.

As far as your body image goes, you can be beautiful AND fat. Don't fall into the American image trap. Start walking. It will help you drop weight AND stay healthy. The healthy part is by far the most important.

Don't dump your boyfriend, Criss. The way you feel about yourself isn't his fault. He loves you because you are lovable. YOU just need to focus on that.

Answer 6

If you and your boy friend are getting along fine, why break up a beautiful relationship just because you are imagining things he does not see. You said you are ugly. Maybe not before his eyes. Maybe he prefers to be with a woman with curves like you as opposed to someone who looks like an anorexic creature made of skin and bones. Stop letting yourself down. Love yourself.

Answer 7

your suffering from lack of self esteem, ....what you think about yourself is not what others think of you.....they see you differently ...the mirror is a nasty place to look when you have no self esteem.. so you imagine your bf seeing the same as you...not true ...do you think hed still be with you if thats what he thought? think about it... but you must start to learn to like yourself and see what others see..before you make a big mistake.....your sex life will improve too if you stop thinking your not sexy attractive ect... you must be to your bf or he wouldnt be wanting sex...i bet he just loves you for you...top to bottom an has no issues ....now you have to realise that and lose your issues and your relationship will grow....

Answer 8

love counseling with enable you comprehend a similar issues you already comprehend to repair this situation... although in case you choose to talk to somebody then sure that doesn't be a bad thought. although interior the previous few years melancholy has grow to be extra of a organic element. yet that still does not incredibly make it ok. Do u locate it no longer situation-free to sleep at nights? are u loosing urge for nutrition? do you choose to be left on ur own all of the time? do u convey all of the united statesto downs? i will ask u alot of comparable questions. if u are going to respond to certain to those questions or certain to extra then 2 of those questions then there's a probability ur melancholy will shop increasing.

Answer 9

maybe you should ask your boyfriend what he see in you it may change the way you feel about your self. Dont break up with him just because your unhappy with your self every one is beautiful it's just a matter of time before you find yours.

Answer 10

IT would be REALLY cruel to him and yourslef to do this. He is with you because he likes something about you so don't worry. Unless he breaks up with you, you are perfectly fine, and you should think better about yourself. DON'T TAKE YOUR LACK OF CONFIDENCE OUT ON THE PERSON WHO LOVES YOU THE MOST!