Why do I hate Sex?

Question

Please refer to this question in my profile (as I posted it first in the Marriage and Divorce category). Thank you

Answer 1

I'm a Christian wife. You probably hate sex because you have a wrong perception of it. God designed sex to be enjoyable for husband & wife, and it's glorifying to Him because it means you are giving to each other (even it doesn't feel like that sometimes.) You don't have to feel like a whore; you're a wife, and you and your husband owe it to each other to make each other happy sexually. You need to loosen up and enjoy it. There are quite a few books out there designed to help Christians get a correct view of sex. If you contact me, I'll send you some suggestions. Remember, pleasing your husband is a good thing - and God wants you to have sex, and not just for reproduction. That why He specifically says in scripture to consistently have sex regularly, and not to quit unless you both agree to for a specific time frame for the purpose of prayer & fasting. He also says that neither husband or wife should deny each other. Blessings to you!

Answer 2

Wow, big question. Do you know that the Bible has sex in it? Sex was created by God to be enjoyed by a married couple. Have you ever read the Song of Solomon?

It sounds like you and your husband are on the right track to great improvements in your life. Have you prayed and asked God to help you enjoy your husband and your sex life with him? Ask God to help you love your husband as He would like you to. This will help you.

Do you have some sexual abuse in your past? Is that why you can only enjoy sex drunk? Maybe you need to work through past issues. I would think you could use some counseling. Remember pastors are human and have heard it all. You won't shock them by sharing your true feelings. Of course, be sure to do this privately.

Men are created to want/need sex every other day or so. Is your husband demanding more than this? Most women I know only want sex once maybe twice a week. We are different from men. We also have stresses of a child always "touching" us, either in our arms, nursing or on our hips. We are often "touched out".

Please don't return to your old lifestyle. Hang in there and give it time. All marriages go through dry spells.

Answer 3

I read your other question as well and I feel sorry that you should think that God created sex for procreation only.That is for animals.They only have the instinct to procreate, not to enjoy. Humans were given the capacity to enjoy sex.It is not dirty or whorish if done between man and wife.It is supposed to be something man and wife enjoys together.It keeps men and woman together.The more eager you are to put out the better the chances of you keeping your man. But you have to do something. You will have to realize that it is supposed to be one of the threads that weave the tapestry of your life and makes it beautiful. Your view is a slight bit twisted. Make yourself beautiful for your husband And above all don`t give in to satans demand for a divorce.As a christian you should realize that one of satans most powerful weapons is decent and divorce.It ruins more than one live and drives people away from the Father.

Answer 4

Perhaps you've had a tramatic sexual experience in your past? If that is the case, it can get better, but you need some help from an expert. If you just have no sex drive, perhaps there is something physically wrong. Either way, I'd seek help because it is such a wonderful part of a relationship and you shouldn't be forced to miss out.

Answer 5

I can't say why you in particular hate sex. I can only guess.

Maybe you have been brainwashed by religionist to believe it is unholy or some sort of a sin.

A sexual relationship between a husband and wife is a shadow of the ultimate Oneness of Christ and the church. The two shall become one flesh. The production of fruit being children alone is not true. There are fruits that are born from sex like intimate relationship and a greater closeness to your husband.

Have you read Song of Solomon?

Were you sexually abused? Do you have a good relationship with your husband? Are you too inhibited to enjoy sex without alcohol?

What is your idea of being in a "slutty" frame of mine?
Being horny, to put it bluntly, is not sin. Sexual desire is not sin. Sexual activity in marriage is not sin.

Answer 6

That's not normal, because it's apart of the human feelings and attractions. Just like the animals' it's a part of life. That's why little puppy hump your leg. THEY can't help it.

Answer 7

One reason could be bad sex. Another could be because of past experiences of abuse. Lastly, you may not know enough of what really pushes your own buttons to have someone else to do it for you!

Answer 8

u do ?maybe u dont like the sweating part,or the clean up part,or the part where we get exhausted, did u know its good for ur heart ? give it a chance,maybe u havnt found right partner,

Answer 9

Maybe there is a physical or physiological reason. I'm married and I really like sex.

Answer 10

Here is the biblical view of sex (within marriage, of course.) It may help you overcome the "dirty" or "guilty" feelings you have.

The purpose of sex is directly connected to the nature of the kingdom of God—which is equivalent to the governing Family of God!

Let’s state again that the human family was instituted by God for a great purpose. It is His method of training us—preparing us to join the ultimate family—the God Family—upon resurrection and change from human flesh to spirit (I Cor. 15:48-54).

Every healthy family relationship is based on love. And love is the foundation of God’s character—the definition of His nature. Twice, the apostle John records, “God is love” (I John 4:8, 16)! Love is not merely something God has, but is rather what He is.

This attribute is also the first of the fruits of God’s Spirit, qualities which are to be evident in the life of a Christian (Gal. 5:22). This love binds together the members of the God Family—currently the Father and Jesus Christ (John 1:1-14).

Marriage between a man and woman is also designed to be based on love, as a reflection of Christ’s relationship with His true Church. We read earlier: “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it...So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies...For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh” (Eph. 5:25-31).

Stated plainly, the “cause” of marriage is love!

Also, sex itself is set forth as another cause—actually directly interconnected with love—for marriage in the Genesis account of the creation of Adam and Eve, and Christ confirms this in the New Testament: “He which made them at the beginning made them male and female, and said, For this cause, shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they two shall be one flesh” (Matt. 19:4-5). The phrase “one flesh” is a direct reference to the sex act within marriage.

These two causes—love and sex—are inseparable within God’s intended design and purpose. Love between spouses is expressed through the means of sex, and God uses marital sex to ingrain within us the principle of love!