i need a joke better than this?

Question

teenaged girl "do baby's realy come from where boys sick their penises."
mother "yes dear they do."
teenaged girl "won't that knock out all of my teeth"

Answer 1

no jokes on my end.

Answer 2

hahaha.....good one...
check this one too........

Two gay men were partners for life and finally decided they wanted a child of their own. After weeks of consultation with Doctors and Psychiatrists the two decided to mix their sperm and implant it into a willing surrogate mother.

Soon they learned that the procedure had worked and that the surrogate was pregnant and doing well. After the usual period of time they got the call they were waiting for...their baby was born!

So they rushed to the hospital to see the little one. Looking through the viewing glass they noticed several newborn girls in a row...all of which were crying and carrying on intensely. Then they spotted a cute little baby boy at the end of the row, smiling and looking at them with great joy...this little baby had to be theirs.

Soon they saw a nurse and she confirmed that yes, indeed the peaceful little boy was their son. They started congratulating each other, saying how lucky they are that they have such a perfectly happy well behaved son.

The nurse, hearing this, said "He may look happy now, but you should see him when we take the pacifier out of his a$$!

Answer 3

A psychopathic man was walkin pass a motor shop n saw a jeep wit 4x4 written on it n tawt it was aquestion n anwered it on d car wit a nail ,the owner saw it n sprayed it off but the guy was passing by n saw it n answered it again thinking they thaught he failed it. so the next the owner saw it he had to spray the answer(=16)on the car to prevent any more trouble .but the next time the crazy guy was passing and saw the answer he said ''good student.s'' and gave it a mark of very good. pretty long right.

Answer 4

Willys cynical thought for the day;

Artificial Intelligence beats real fugging stupidity!

Little Johnny came home from school one day confused. His mother was Jewish and his father was Black. So Johnny asks, "Mommy am I more Jewish or more Black?"

"What does it really matter? If you want to know for sure you'll just have to ask your father," his mother tells him.

So, when his father arrived home from work, Little Johnny asks the same question, " Daddy, am I more Jewish or more Black?"

"What kind of question is that?" Why do you want to know if you're more Jewish or more Black?" asks dad.

"Well, it's like this dad ... Tommy down the street wants to sell his bicycle for $50, and I don't know whether to talk him down to $25, or wait until it's dark and steal the freaking thing." 

http://www.total-knowledge.com/~willyblues/

Answer 5

A mother is giving her three year old son a bath. As most children his age will, he discovers his private part and asks his mother, "Mommy, is this my brain?!" The mother smiles wryly and answers calmly, "Not yet dear".

Thank you! I'll be here all week... :)

Answer 6

little johnny would sit by his bed and pray every night, and his father would come in and listen to him. so one night johnny prayed: God bless Mommy, Daddy, Grandma, and goodbye Grandpa! the next day his grandpa died. The dad was like, well that was weird.
The next night Johnny prayed: God bless Mommy, Daddy, and goodbye grandma! the next day his grandma died. the dad was kind of freaked out by this, so he listened to his son the following night.
Johnny prayed: God bless Mommy and goodbye Daddy! Now the dad was totally freaking out by then. so all the next day and night, he sat in the living room, hoping that if he can make it to midnight, then he would be alive. Well the clock struck midnight, the dad breathed a sigh of relief, and went to bed.
The next day his wife said, How was your day honey? the dad was like, it was fine. How was yours? his wife said, Well, the strangest thing happened yesterday. The mail man was at the door delivering the mail, and just like that he just dropped dead!

LOL

Answer 7

The Swedish Pharmacy joke:-

Man: Gut mornink, I vud like to buy a deodourant

Assistant: Certainly Sir. Ball or aerosol?

Man: No, I vant it for my armpits

Answer 8

That special Olympics joke was kinda harsh

Answer 9

the japanese finally invented the fastest camera in the world with lightning speed shutter closer

it can actually take a photo of an Australian with








their mouth shut.

Answer 10

little billy goes to his dad asks for a new bike. bill's dad says, billy we've got a 70,000$ mortgage, money's tight. we can't afford it.billy says, that's ok , i understand. two days later, billy goes to his dad and asks for ten dollars to buy a cd, again his dad says, money"s tight, we can't afford it. a few days later, billy's dad is driving thru town and spots billy in the bus station. he stops and asks billy what he thinks he's doing. billy says, dad last night i got up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, as i got by your door, i heard you telling mom you were pulling out, she said she was coming too. AND I'LL BE DAMNED IF YOU'RE GOING TO STICK ME WITH A 70,000$ MORTGAGE

Answer 11

What's better than winning gold at the special olympics?