My boyfriend (of 6 months) and I were very serious and talking about the future (we're 30). The last month we were getting annoyed over the littlest things with eachother and bickering. We both were not very happy. Last week, we decided to take a break, and after three days of the break, I realized I really wanted to be with him. I guess I was quicker than him, since I called and he said he is still trying to figure out why he is unhappy, (if it's b/c f our relationship) and needs time. I asked what I should do, just call in 2 weeks, and he said do we need to put a definite time on it? I said no, but in reality I can't deal with the uncertainty. I love him and want to be with him, but I'm going crazy. I know he's not seeing others on this break.
Can I call in 2 weeks, and if he hasn't figured it out yet, do I just break up with him? I know that if I love him, I should be able to wait as long as it takes, but I'm going crazy and am not able to function with this uncertainty.
2006-08-05 05:54:10 · 28 answers · asked by waiting 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
tell him to take all the time he needs, you in the meantime go on with your life. if it means breaking up for good then so be it. best to find out now instead of after youre married with 2 or 3 kids. Life is to short to let someone else control your life.
2006-08-13 04:48:07 · answer #1 · answered by duc602 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Contact him and arrange a get together in a month or two month--whatever you're both comfortable with, and then you can decided where you go from there.
And whatever you do, don't spend the 'break' sitting around waiting for him. If you were too dependent upon him for your happiness, he might have been feeling smothered. Develop your own interests and things to do--enjoy being with yourself and other people.
If if he meets a confident self-sufficient woman instead of a clingy dependent girl when you get together again, he may just fall in love with you all over again. If he doesn't, you'll at least have yourself. There was obviously some resentment there on both of your parts if you were getting along so poorly. If your personalities are incompatible, it's far better that you find out now rather than after you're trapped in an unhappy marriage.
2006-08-13 05:33:16 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Sue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Six months? If it is little things that you all can not get past now, then you definitely need awhile to figure things out and know how to be fair in your disagreements. Maybe you both are not wanting the same things. Your age has nothing to do with that-unless you are under18. Age is a number and yes you may feel the need to be in a commitment by that time or around that frame, but unless you and your partner are sure that this is it, then you will want to be committed if you make that mistake. lol. So do not rush into anything or stress about this. I know that I would be stressing too, if I liked the guy and it is easier for me to just sit here and tell you what I would try to do. I am just telling you what is best to do, not what is the easiest thing to do. So, take this time to do things you normally would not do if he were around, Have a good time---life is too short.
2006-08-05 06:05:43 · answer #3 · answered by just julie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had this problem once with my boyfriend. The thing you're not certain if he's coming he didn't give you anything definite, which you crave. When this happened to me I broke up with him( part of my personality is intolerance of immaturity). You'll say that if you loved him so much you should wait blah blah blah.... But you are in your 30s aren't you to old to still be uncertain of how you feel. You plan to wait 2 weeks to call in which is ok but if by that time he still is not yet ready to face how he feels then you should probably test the waters already.
2006-08-13 04:58:42 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He decided to take break?
Are you insane?
To guys, a "break" is an opportunity to play the field. There is no way that you know for sure he isn't seeing some body else, so don't lie to yourself.
There is nothing to keep him from asking for another break down the road. You will regret giving him this one.
2006-08-05 06:03:43 · answer #5 · answered by Tyler Durdin 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only reason why guys ask for a break is cause they want to see someone else. She may not be available right now so he is waiting. Why do you have to wait for him? He should know if he wants to come back or not. I would take it as him not wanting to come back and you should move on.
2006-08-11 12:49:57 · answer #6 · answered by lonelyforever 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You sound so clingy and needy. That is most likely why he needs a break. Don't sit by the phone. Find something to do with your life while he is on break. Love is hard, I know. And women are emotional. But you must find a way to rule your emotions because they are ruling you too deeply.
2006-08-12 15:49:00 · answer #7 · answered by cami 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
None.
Asking for time away is nothing more than a license to shop around for other women while he keeps you as a back up plan. And you can expect him to keep jerking you around with the time, unless he finds another woman. Stop being the second string woman!
2006-08-05 06:04:30 · answer #8 · answered by Willie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not know how to help you, the only thing I know for sure is that HE IS NOT COMING BACK!
He is breaking up with you slowly but surely. I am sorry to say this, but you need to go on without him. He is not into you.
2006-08-13 03:40:10 · answer #9 · answered by Pi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know it must be difficult, but hold on let him know ur still there & that he can be honest with u about his feelings. Ask him how much time he needs but ensure he is not stringing u along. it will. HERE'S A TIP TRY TO FOCUS ON U & LOCK THOUGHTS OF HIM AWAY IN A LITTLE BOX FOR NOW. IF IT IS TO BE IT WILL BE.
LIKE MY UNLCE SAYS DON'T LET ANYONE STEAL UR JOY!!!!!!
2006-08-13 03:38:08 · answer #10 · answered by Blaque Inque 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋