I am 27, and she is 23. I teach High School in a town that is in upstate New York. She was a grad. student in the same town that I teach in. I met her as a substitute teacher who was working in my building. In June, she graduated, and moved back home to her parents house (3 hours away) due to the lack of a job. I took her on vacation for 2 weeks in July, and I informally (no ring?!!) asked her to marry me. She said yes that day, but now wants to wait. The distance is rough. I really love her, and would die for her if that was a situation that was encountered. I don't know what to do. I've asked her to move here, but she hates the area. Should I try to keep the relationship going?
2006-08-05 05:06:44 · 9 answers · asked by BeachDragon 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
That is a good idea. However, the state that she lives in does not recognize my teaching cert. Connecticut will not accept my NY cert, and I would have to re-enroll in school for at least a year. I cannot afford to both at the second!
2006-08-05 05:14:01 · update #1
Have you considered looking for another job and moving closer to her? If you believe that she is the one for you, then you may need to make some changes in your life so that you can be happy together.
2006-08-05 05:12:36 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
First and foremost, I feel, you need to find out, what she's doing while,living with her folks.....For her to put off, the whole wedding thing, and stating that she doesn't like it, where, you reside, says alot to me.......But,,there's also limited details, in your question.....From what you've written about her, it sounds as if she already has a whole nother' life, going on right where she is..This could also, mean she also, has, another guy on the line, where she is, and the reason, for her wanting to put off the whole "Wedding" thing........In order to make sure , that your the one, or needing "Confirmation" from, another man, perhaps? Confirmation, that he's not as "Serious" , as you are, maybe, before, she totally, commits, herself to you, maybe......If I'm wrong, about the other guy, thing, than maybe, its she's just not ready,for marriage, at all, just yet, and she used the disliking of your environment, as an excuse.........I dont know, just be careful, and ask her questions, about why, all the negative, forces, and "Delays" and so on........Fishing, for answers, isn't a bad thing to do......You should definately , Know in your heart of hearts, if she is indeed the woman, for you, before, you commit, because, for you to have to see what we think, this all could very well be something that little still small voice, is trying to tell you, not too , get too involved, with her........Sounds like, she's more mysterious, than, you want her , to be.......And later, that could very well, get in your way, once, your married to her....Just be careful, is my suggestion, to you.......Good-Luck, to you!!! And just follow, your heart, in your desicion-making.........
2006-08-05 05:27:56 · answer #2 · answered by Hmg♥Brd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should keep the relationship going as a friendship. Try to find someone else in your area to hang out with. She isn't willing to make any sacrifices to be with you . That is very telling of how she will be in the future as a wife. Let it go.
2006-08-05 05:13:31 · answer #3 · answered by lolababy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep the relationship going, my bf and i have been going out for 9months also, And in love. and if you are in love you'll do anything to be together so find a job closer to her and move in together.
2006-08-05 05:16:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait a little bit more, do not pressurise her...And then after a couple of months ask her again. If she has still not decided, let it go. When you love somebody, you don't mind the area, trust me!
2006-08-05 05:14:07 · answer #5 · answered by Andy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You all need to come to reason and move somewhere you both agree with. If she really loves you and wants to be with you then she will come to an agreement. And if you love her you will to. Compromise things. And you need to find a way to put that spark back into your relationship esp. after the wanting to wait thing, because she could be drifting away.
2006-08-05 05:13:10 · answer #6 · answered by hnic_shannon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
End it now! It's not gonna work 23, back to Mom and Dad, no job? Hello! here is your sign! She is not ready don't be a dope! sorry!
2006-08-05 05:13:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, just find someone else to die for. Now what do you think you freaking idiot? You say you would die for her but your unwilling to wait or move yourself? Damn, I just don't understand educated stupid people.
2006-08-05 05:13:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe instead of asking her to change you should change. you go to where she lives and find a job.
2006-08-05 05:14:28 · answer #9 · answered by cherry 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋