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I don't want to hurt her feelings, because I know she means well and she's just being a grandma, but it's driving me nuts! She lets him do anything he wants and has even let him do things that I have just said no to like five seconds before. I've talked to her about certain things, but she ignores me and lets him do it when I'm not around. It's gotten so bad that my dad and my little sister are coming to me and telling me what she lets him do when I'm not around. My son is very well-behaved, but after being with Grandma for too long he is a little monster! Sometimes I think she wants to be his mom, she seems almost obsessive about him. It's getting weird. How do I talk to her about this without offending her and making things awkward? Or can I even do that?

2006-08-05 04:13:36 · 7 answers · asked by me 6 in Family & Relationships Family

7 answers

Don't let him be with her as much. She will notice that she does not see him as much and will ask you why. When she ask why tell her the truth. That she isn't doing him any good by letting him do what he wants. If she can't understand that then you will have to get mean. Try to let her figure it out first though.

2006-08-05 04:22:11 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

First of all, you are lucky that you have a mom who cares about your child. Just had to say that, because my mom is no longer alive, and my mother-in-law isn't overly attentive towards my two kids (who are not little anymore). Now that I've said that, I think you need to choose what you get upset about, even 'tho it is your right as the mother to counsel your mom about this. Tell her that you aren't happy when she goes against your wishes and that you will have to stop bringing him around so often if she persists in going against your requests. You may risk offending her, but if you speak to her in the most diplomatic way and she still doesn't get it, then you've pretty much got to decide the next step...which could be staying away for awhile. I guess I wonder how old you are, too, because if you are a fairly "young" mother and she's obsessed (almost as if she's the mother), I'd say you need to do some separating from her still (if you are so worried about offending her).

2006-08-05 11:26:25 · answer #2 · answered by 60s Chick 6 · 0 0

Not awkward, I don't know about that. Sounds like it already is, but be firm. It would take a lot of self confidence, but you might try this: Ask her if she respects you as a parent. Tell her that you have laid out certain rules and why you don't want him doing those things. Ask her to comply with those rules. It's making hard on you and confusing the child. He won't understand (depending on the age) why he can do it at Grandma's but not at home. Let her know it's not fair to him to make him play be two sets of rules. If she still doesn't listen to you- this is where it will get tough. Let her know that to protect yourself and him, his visits will be shorter or stop all together until she can respect your wishes.

It would be very hard to follow, but it just might work. I hope it all works out for you.

2006-08-05 11:29:32 · answer #3 · answered by penagian 2 · 0 0

sit her down and tell her how you feel if she still doesn't listen then tell her if she doesn't stop you will not bring him over with out you there it may seem mean but you don't want your son growing up to be a spoiled brat.
good luck

2006-08-05 11:31:41 · answer #4 · answered by GREATGRL 2 · 0 0

its grandmas perogitive, let her do it, not all cildren have a grandparent to spoil them,grandma might not be around to long ,let your child have good memosies of his or her grandma, loveing them and spoiling them. its a great memory.something to cherish

2006-08-05 15:20:44 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

stop dropping the little brat off at your moms. invest in a baby sitter.

2006-08-05 11:18:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

well hire a baby sitters do not take him to your mom house nomore

2006-08-05 11:24:33 · answer #7 · answered by osaro_adu 3 · 0 0

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