See i went with my friend to a state park we did not do anything rong and we were with her parents.Her parents are very good people and they watched after me very well, but when i could not get a hold of my mom i asked my father and he said no.When mom finally came home she said yes but my dad was asleep.When he woke up and found out he was mad.My mom told me to call.I forgot and when i finally went to call i had no signal.We got home at a decent time but i called when i finally got a signal and now i am grounded.My dad trustes no one and won't let me go no where.I am 12 years old and i have a cell phone.I take it with me everywhere.I want to know what to do to be able to show that i am responsible.No stupid answers please!
2006-08-04 18:14:41 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
Oh sweetie, don't be in such a hurry to grow up.
You are 12 years old, and it sounds like you are a girl.
Your dad is so in love with you that he wants only the best for you.
What you don't realize is - you make think you know alot but what you know is probably book knowledge, or stuff you have seen on t.v.
Your dad has real world knowlege, and that is very scary stuff.
There are alot of guys out there just waiting to take advantage of you, and the way they do it is so subtle that you won't know what hit you until you are in a vulnerable situation.
Then there are those that are not subtle and will just take what they want and toss you aside like a rag doll.
He is trying to protect you - and what is wrong with that?
You have a cell phone - that didn't do you much good did it, you had no signal.
You "forgot to call", can you imagine the worry you must have put him through?
Instead of being mad at him - hug him.
Explain that even though you are upset you know he is too and you are happy that he is your dad and that he loves you so much (do you know how many kids have absent fathers? Men who don't even care enough to help finacially suport them much less care about if they are safe or not),
You say that your dad "trusts no one", do you know why?
One night when no one is upset, ask him why?
Maybe he has a good reason because of something that happend to him or a friend of his.
Maybe he is just overprotective.
Maybe you need to understand that it is his job to protect you and he takes that job seriously.
Maybe you need to cut him a break.
When you are sitting at home grounded, count your blessings (you are sitting in your own home, probably in your own room, your clothes are pretty decent and clean, you have food in the cupboards, you don't have to worry about your dad knocking your mom around in the next room and wondering if you are next, worse yet you don't have to worry about your dad not being there to protect you and your mom's boyfriend makes you feel creepy because of the way he keeps looking at you, etc.......)
Life is what you make it, sit around and feel sorry for yourself because you got caught, or learn from this mistake and don't keep having to re-learn it in the future.
Take care.
p.s. by the way, in our house if one parent says no and you go ask the other one, you get double the punishment. Playing parents off of each other is so not cool.
It is another thing to be upfront and go to mom and say "Dad said no, but can you talk to him for me".
If after that, he still says no, then follow through and stay home.
That will show your parents that you are starting to mature.
2006-08-04 21:47:46 · answer #1 · answered by Freeadviceisworthwhatyoupayfor 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If one parent says no, you shouldn't go to the other parent to get them to say yes. What you're doing will 'cause your parents to fight and argue. It's not very mature, but that's okay because you are still a child.
And that brings me to my next point. As adult as you may feel, you are still a child. Be happy. Enjoy it. You'll never have it again. Don't grow up too fast. Hear me? DON'T GROW UP TOO FAST!
Remember, even though you might not like what your dad says, he is still your dad, and he loves you. He's OLD too, and he's learned alot in his long long long long long looooong life! He's probably much wiser than you realize. Trust him and respect his judgement. He is your father and he loves you. It's his job to watch over you. How lucky you are to have such a wonderful father!
PS I hope you realize that Mr. X is trying to cause trouble. Doing that would HURT your parents very much, and it would hurt you too.
2006-08-04 19:12:50 · answer #2 · answered by Hank 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all when you ask one parent can you go some where and they say no you should not have went behind you daddy back and ask your mother can you go and I do not think he is being over protective it is that some times have their reasons for saying no to some of the things we do cause they love us and do not want anything to happen to us and besides how do you know if he did not have any thing plan for you two to do.
2006-08-05 01:13:47 · answer #3 · answered by Fannie D 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You shouldn't play your parents off against each other. Your dad said no then accept it but maybe go to your mum and tell her how you feel and she may have talked to him. Now your parents won't trust you. Of course you should be grounded you went against what your father wanted. And remember. A mobile phone won't protect you from being raped or murdered
2006-08-05 00:35:18 · answer #4 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If Dad gave you an answer by you going to your mom appears sneaky.
In the future just ask Mom if Dad usually says no.
2006-08-05 13:48:21 · answer #5 · answered by Marge Simpson 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When your father says no don't ask your mother for one thing. Just because you WANT to do something doesn't mean you get to. If you want to show that you are responsible start by doing what you're told. Responsible people follow the rules.
2006-08-04 19:10:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
For starters if your dad tells you no then you dont go to your mom and ask her. If they tell you to call at a certain time then ya better do it. If they dont trust you then you just have to prove to them that you can be trusted. If they dont let you do anything then you cant be free to even prove to them that you can.
2006-08-04 18:23:38 · answer #7 · answered by Latintweety 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, when one parent tells you no then you shouldn't go to the other parent. Whether you want to admit it or not, you are playing them off of each other. Just take your punishment, that will show them that you are responsible for your own actions.
2006-08-04 18:25:36 · answer #8 · answered by guineasomelove 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep, parents are sometimes a bummer huh? Sometimes because of them you loose friends or they sometimes destroy your social life and stuff like that.....Try to confront at your parents and maybe tell a white lie like"BCoz of you I have no friends or something like that" if they ground you more, every time they try to talk with you just ignore them and make them feel its all their fault why your life is so miserable.eventually they'll feel sorry for you and make you go to your friends and stuff, but dont do drugs!
2006-08-04 18:24:29 · answer #9 · answered by BUDOKAI 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
baby girl although your mad right now and dont want to hear this your father loves you and dont wanna see anything happen to you take it from someone who knows and oh yeah a cell phone cant save your life and you cant use a cell phone if your robbed take it as a blessing you have someone love you as much as your dad does you should be telling him thank you
2006-08-04 18:21:00 · answer #10 · answered by ounce212001 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋