She is 23 and I am 20....she lives with my parents....I live at college except for the summers...and she HATES me. I have no clue why. Ever since we were little she has been so mean to me. I can NOT trust her because she has done things to RUIN my days at home and she is HORRIBLE. Does anyone have any suggestions on how I can feel better?
2006-08-04 17:01:22 · 11 answers · asked by maggi r 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She's jealous because you are getting educated and on your way to bigger and better things. There has probably always been something superior she has resneted in you, and that's not your fault. The issue is with HER, and not with you, so continue to get you education and be successful, and let her drown in her own self pity. If she wants to better herself, she will. Don't let her hangups ruin your days.
2006-08-04 17:12:20 · answer #1 · answered by ?princesshousewife? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What makes you call her a loser? That could be the problem right there! She may feel inferior to you, jealous because of your achievements, angry,resentful and bitter because of your accomplishments.
You say she lives at home, right! Well she probably feels llike nothing is going on in her life because of where she is at right now and you are out in the world experiencing all the things she wishes she could experience too. I really don't know I am just guessing here.
Do you get all the praise from your parents and she get passed over? Do they compare you two and tell her she should be more ike you??
My suggestion is that you take her out to lunch, purchase a little gift to give to her too, make sure you do the driving ,(because she will have to depend on you to get home and you want to be able to have a talk with her). Some place she likes. Have your lunch and then when every one is full and content, broach the subject of why you two don't get along that well and you really love her and have her best interest at heart. Ask her what can you do to make things right between you two. Also ask her what does she want to do with her life and how can you play a part in helping her reach her goals.
This is the best that I can come up with and I hope it helps!
2006-08-05 00:27:07 · answer #2 · answered by December Princess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
know that her jealousy is because she is unable to get away from the house and become an independent woman like yourself.This is not easy to work hard and struggle so feel good about yourself on this point. Just treat her with loving kindness and stay out of her way until she is ready to talk to you. Don't let her issues become yours, be calm and don't try to fix everything...just be supportive and apologize for the way she feels...especially if you didn't do anything. ..are you doing something? perhaps making her feel poorly about herself? or does your family favor you over her? sisters have a special bond and should be on the same side even protective of their relationship from eveyone, even the parents. Only a loser sister would call her sister a loser...education does not make you a better person than her ...only a person who can help others more.
2006-08-05 00:29:00 · answer #3 · answered by cheryl w 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When I was a child my big sister was my idol I wanted to just like her ... but as I grew up that all changed for so long she controlled my life ... thinking she knew what was best for me.. but now I'm married with 3 daughters and she is living house to house...but I don't judge her for the choices she has made and I will always be there when she needs me. regardless of how big of a loser she is... maybe the reason is that she was the only kid before you all her life she problem watch you go though life so easy when she has it hard.. are you paying for that collage or is your parents ? that must hurt a little that you are there and she is not.. just think about it your parent problem talk about you all the time .. and what do they have to say about your sister ... no matter what don't give up if she needs space give it, but when she needs a friend be there even if you feel she hates you ..because she doesn't ... no matter how many problem my sister cause me I was there when she needed me ..
2006-08-05 00:22:01 · answer #4 · answered by daughterslove3 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could start off by not calling her a loser??? I mean it is just a suggestion. My older brother has a baby and him, his baby, and his girlfriend all live with my parents whereas I am 5 years younger and moved out a LONG time ago. There is one in every family not exactly a loser but maybe..."the baby."
2006-08-05 00:11:38 · answer #5 · answered by tasha_smiles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her. And not in a superficial roundabout way. Perhaps even in front of your parents or out in a public place so that you both can keep yourselves under control. You can only do so much on your side. Let her know how you feel and then the ball is in her court.
2006-08-05 00:07:36 · answer #6 · answered by Venus M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are not able to talk to her, then my suggestion is not to give her the power to make you feel bad. Once she realizes that she no longer has the ability to make you feel terrible, she will quit. After all, it's probably just a game to her and if you no longer play, then it's no longer fun.
2006-08-05 00:10:36 · answer #7 · answered by I love my husband 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit her down tell her you either want her to shut the MF up and leave u alone and get along or just to quit talking to you period....and if she is liing at home consult your parents about the situation....she must be threatened by you so i would be careful cause that can turn ugly quickly
2006-08-05 00:14:37 · answer #8 · answered by Jochle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sorry that your parents or whoever has raised you kids to hate and not love each other...sad!!!
you'll feel better if you study self-esteem and get the training to cope with a rotten upbringing like yours was.
i was brought up like that (hate in the family) but self-esteem work helps a lot.
2006-08-05 00:11:24 · answer #9 · answered by jimrich 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ignore her horrible ways, since you can't get her outta your life then just put up with it.
2006-08-05 00:08:39 · answer #10 · answered by maggotier 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋