If dad doesn't recognize his girl is growing up, so he tends to treat her the same as her little brother (pop her on the butt, snap the elastic of her shorts, etc.)
I don't want to imply that he is being sexual with her, It just seems she is a little to old for that, and her mother does not touch her in "those" areas. She is old enough to be very sensitive in the new-breast area, but still young. She hasn;t shown emotional discomfort as she is just goofing with dad and he with her.
Should he be approached about this and if so how.
Please only answer seriously.
Thanks
2006-08-04 15:05:44 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
oh no. it IS inappropriate. this isn't playful it is veiled in sexual overtones. sexual and harrassment. it's dirty and bad at any age
2006-08-04 15:11:50 · answer #1 · answered by Go! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wrestled with my dad and brothers all my life and I am 35 and we still go at it at times and never really thought much about it. Chances are her father is the same way and doesn't want to suddenly treat her any different. I would suggest to just mention to the dad that her body is changing and he might want to be a little more cautious of what he does although the fun doesn't have to stop. The girl should be told that if any of it hurts her or makes her feel uncomfortable to speak up and not be afraid to do so. My daughter, step-daughter and husband (girls are 14 and 15) go at is all the time but they all know the boundries. Open honest communication is the best thing here because it sounds like the girl has fun but with the way things are today something as inncocent as this could cause a big problem.
2006-08-04 15:13:27 · answer #2 · answered by Martha S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if shes older than 8 or 9, then he should nt b 'wrestling' with her or snapping underwear. tell him, that u know he loves his daughter, but she s growing up and bcoming a young lady. she s 2 old 4 that kind of attention. but the way u said that the mother does not touch her in 'those' places, seems like ur trying 2 say something different. i got a 'red light' flash when i read that. do u think there is something going on in thathousehold?? if u do, u need 2 report it. even if the girl shows no discomfort, she could still b being abused, and at that young age, shes confused. i was molested when i was young, and if this girl needs help, help her please. can u talk 2 her, ask her if everything is ok? dont ask her if shes bing abused, she ll get defensive, and tell u no. u need 2 b sutle about it. talk 2 some1 please & find out whats going on, ok? i pray she is not being abused.
2006-08-04 15:29:10 · answer #3 · answered by big foot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that the father should be approached about this matter. If the girl is already developing breasts, she is too old, in my opinion, to be "wrestling" with her father or any other male. If it were me, I would start a conversation when both parties are relaxed and say something to the effect that the girl is growing up and becoming a young woman. A man might not recognize this fact--I've known several who don't. But as gently as you can, suggest to the father that she is getting too old for physical contact, and that even if he means nothing by it, his actions can be misconstrued by other people. Eventually, the girl may also feel uncomfortable about what he is doing and not be willing to say anything to him herself for fear of hurting his feelings. This is a difficult area, but it can be dealt with only honestly and with consideration of all people's feelings. If you are a Christian, I suggest praying about what to say before you have the conversation.
Best wishes to you, and may God bless you all.
2006-08-04 15:18:32 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that it is not really an issue..some father's and their daughters can goof around and wrestle for as long as they want to..as long as the dad is not a pervert and the girl is not uncomfortable with it..I am sure that she will be able to tell her dad when it starts to makes her feel uncomfortable
2006-08-04 15:16:24 · answer #5 · answered by hahaha 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not identify who you are in the big scheme of things. Yes, it is definitely inappropriate what he is doing. If the mother is a close friend or relative, I would take her aside and talk to her in a gentle way and tell her of your concerns. Make you tell her that you really "wrestled" with the idea of saying anything since this is a family thing but you decided that it just had to be said....then tell her of your observation. If she tells you to "Butt Out".....well, you did all that you could do and.....just Butt Out.
2006-08-04 15:11:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know what I think. I think if they are ok with it then I don't see a problem with it. I'm 22 and my dad and I still wrestle and beat up on eachother in a playful manner. So no I don't see a problem. Hope I helped.
2006-08-04 15:34:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speaking as a father of a daughter, my serious answer is that it is never appropriate for fathers and daughters to "wrestle". The father to whom you are referring should find some other way to have fun with his daughter.
2006-08-04 15:11:16 · answer #8 · answered by canucklehead1951 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, I would say that when they start growing boobs is when the dad should stop. Otherwise it depends on the daughter and if she feels comfortable with him doing that. Hope I helped ya.
2006-08-04 15:11:19 · answer #9 · answered by Rknrobn 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
about the age of 6 or 7(at the most)
just tell him gently in private that she is growing up and that is not fun for her anymore
2006-08-04 15:08:55 · answer #10 · answered by Library Eyes 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
fathers don't see there little girls growing up like mothers do . so i don't think he see it and if his little girl don't want to play like that any more she will tell him dad!! i know i did the same-thing with my dad i had to tell him i am grown now he did not want to face that but he did
2006-08-04 15:12:50 · answer #11 · answered by nightsky1331 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋