My step children are 20 and 18. They no longer live with us at home. They have been physcially and verbally abusive to our 8 year old and myself. They were verbally abusive to my other children now 15 and 18. They ONLY call their father to ask for money or to verbally abuse or threaten him by bringing up the past from his previous marriage (which was now ended 12 years) ago). Now the 18 year old is collecting welfare because he refuses to live anywhere that he has to follow rules. He is taking his father to court for child support. He barely attends school and still needs another full year to graduate IF he gets all his credits. How do we make the madness stop??? Please help....
2006-08-04 12:30:51 · 8 answers · asked by laurel2006 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Already tried the therapy...don't work if ppl are not willing.boy was going twice a week when he lived with us.18 year old is on welfare because he doesn't want to "obey" anyones house rules, so welfare is technically suing his father to pay for the support. He still needs another year of high school to graduate, only passed 11 of 20 credits attempted in past 2 years and has missed on average 35-40% of class time doesn't work just drugs and parties.
sorry...just very very frustrated and hurt that ppl can still upset me this way.
older stepdaughter is in support of her brother. She is attending a university but we are still responsible for approx. 8K per year of her school which means loans for us! My oldest is going into 2nd year of college, she works full-time and asks for very little in help. she just turned 18, my next is 15 and also works full-time in summer and part-time in school year for spending money because we have nothing left for them because of the steps
2006-08-05 01:17:42 · update #1
Treat it like any other "person who's harassing you". I know it's harsh, but I'm sure you've been as tolerant as possible and tried to be nice. Maybe it's time to take THEM to court. How bout a restraining order? I know they're his "children" but at some point you have to prove to them you will NOT be a doormat. If they're mean enough to do what they're doing, then you can be mean enough to protect yourself and your family.
2006-08-04 12:37:04 · answer #1 · answered by paintgirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Call Dr. Phil. In some cases it is common for children to act out when their parents get a divorce, but given their ages and that it has been 12 years. Things should have settled down. Where is their mother?
It probably would help big time for you all to go into family consouling. it probably would be best for dad and the two older children from his first marriage to start it out and then the rest of you join, sometime after. It sounds like they may have a lot of unresolved feelings and anger, and have taken it out on everyone, even though their real anger maybe towards their father.
2006-08-04 12:39:27 · answer #2 · answered by Linds 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is ridiculous. Does some nutty 18 year old actually think he can get child support for himself? First tape a few of their phone calls where they threaten you or your family. Change your home and cell phone numbers and keep them unlisted. Change your e-mail addresses. File a countersuit against the 18 year old for a frivilous lawsuit and file a restraining order against both of them for you, your husband, and the rest of the family. Good luck and God Bless. You're gonna need it.
2006-08-04 12:40:30 · answer #3 · answered by stseukn 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well when he takes his father t court ...you need to be ready with all your accounts on what he has done and how he is abusive..Hire an attorney and counter sue him for abuse...Get the bastard right there in court after that ask for a restraining order because you are afraid of hi...
2006-08-04 12:55:29 · answer #4 · answered by Mrs. M 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Either the police or family therapy. They don't seem to want to work anything out with your famiy, so this is probably a good time to give it a last ditch effort with therapy or take steps to keep them away from you unless they agree to try to work things out (i.e., blocking their phone numbers, getting the authorities involved). I realize that this may sound harsh, but just because they refuse a chance at happiness doesn't mean they can take yours away. Good luck.
Meni
2006-08-04 12:37:40 · answer #5 · answered by mycatslinky 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Change your phone number and have it unlisted and unpublished, for starters. I had to do this myself when a son-in-law started calling at all hours cursing me out.
Second off, when they call and are abusive, call the non-emergency police dept. number and file a report. If they continue to do it, then have a restraining order placed against them.
Good Luck and I hope that I have helped.
2006-08-04 12:39:15 · answer #6 · answered by nana4dakids 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Physical abuse is a deal breaker. Move.
2006-08-04 12:42:12 · answer #7 · answered by mynamesapain 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
move
2006-08-04 12:43:21 · answer #8 · answered by him n her♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋