2006-08-04 08:02:51 · 14 answers · asked by ak517969 2 in Health ➔ Diseases & Conditions ➔ Other - Diseases
This is a relative - not a boyfriend
2006-08-04 08:08:24 · update #1
you cant because they wont listen, an alcoholic has to realize he has a problem for himself, I'm speaking from experience my partner is an alcoholic and I'm the one with the problem when I mention it.
2006-08-04 08:08:01 · answer #1 · answered by paula p 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That's a hard one. Most will deny it. I have alcohol issues too, but don't consider myself an alcoholic (I now limit my drinks)But then again, not many WILL consider themselves alcoholics!
I guess the first step is finding out what is an excessive amount of drinking. The U.S. is fairly conservative with alcohol consumption and what might be considered excessive here is considered normal in Europe and other countries. If he/she drinks 2-3 drinks on average a day.. I'd leave it alone. This actually falls under normal guidelines and is what I follow.
If it is over 4 drinks a day EVERY single day then.. I'd probably would think that there is a problem. To over-do it on occasion is fine but to be drunk and wake up with a hangover every day (I know people who do that) is definitely problematic.
Perhaps you could mail an anonymous brochure with a kind & caring note stating something like, "I don't want you to be angry but I'm concerned about your drinking. Maybe you dont' have a problem but maybe you do. Will you please read this and see what you think? I wouldn't do this if I didn't care. - A Friend."
Alcoholics WILL be angry at you if you dare take away their booze. It's not an easy thing and you can't force anyone to stop.
2006-08-04 16:56:53 · answer #2 · answered by spike_is_my_evil_vampire 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi,
Being close to someone helps when a sensitive issue such as this is being discussed.You should make the person aware of the ill effects of drinking and the pain and suffering that follows it.
Personally i would do it this way:
I would find a catelouge on the ill effects of drinking and just read it out aloud when he's not drunk. just say that u are not gonna be happy with him or her if this continues. Use sentimental statements too.
You are a wonderful person and i would like to complement u. Not many would do something like this!!!!
All the very best in ur efforts
Keep smiling,
Jeyanth.k
2006-08-04 15:16:03 · answer #3 · answered by Jeyanth K 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A person has to realize this themselves and they can only handle it themselves. A well excepted formula is this : There are 5 areas of your life money, law, interpersonal relationships, health, and school and/or work ... if you have a problem in more than one of those areas due to alcohol; you have a problem. I suppose you could have an "intervention" and talk to your friend about it, but it is likely that this will end in one of two ways. 1) your friend will go to AA and all will live happily ever after 2) your friend will think you are out of place and this will effectively end the friendship. Sorry for the bad news, but the only one who can help your friend is your friend.
2006-08-04 21:05:34 · answer #4 · answered by Drama Queen 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would approach them in a kind friendly matter, say "listen you're my friend/relative/partner and im worried about you." discuss the problem and try to come up with solutions but first, i would find out if they are really an alcoholic.
2006-08-04 15:09:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you are close to them you should have no problem saying, look i think you might have a drinking problem approach it head on if you think they are heading somewhere not so good its best to nip it in the bud before its to late that's why this persons closest friends should be the one to speak up before it is to late and if your that close you don't have to worry about this messin up the relationship.
2006-08-04 15:11:41 · answer #6 · answered by Calin215 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There really is no easy answer to this one...
But you can come out and say it...
You know they probably already know it deep in their heart...
It is an addiction and unless they want to admit to their addiction their is no help for them ...
It is up to them to take the first steps of admitting the problem..
You can tell them how you feel...
But unless they are ready to come clean nothing you say or do will matter...
I have been there in that situation I know...
2006-08-04 15:09:35 · answer #7 · answered by mcdspurple 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to them about it in private. Tell them in that you don't want to be around them when they are drinking, and stick to it.
An alcoholic doesn't stop until the negatives outweigh whatever positives they feel they are getting from drinking.
2006-08-06 22:58:12 · answer #8 · answered by raysny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pick a quiet time and sit down for a talk. Go to
http://www.aa.org to learn how. They will likely deny a problem, be firm but listen. Get AA people to help, ask for a "twelth step call."
2006-08-04 15:08:24 · answer #9 · answered by helixburger 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get all their relatives and people close to this person together and have an intervention. contact the local AA facility, or a AODA counselor
2006-08-04 16:13:22 · answer #10 · answered by James M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋