I am in a really awesome relationship and my bf trusts me whole heartedly.Ive been hit on a lot since weve been 2gether and had several guys give me their phone#s and e-mail add.I even talk 2 some of them.Hes comepletely cool with this and never blinks an eye about me talking 2 guys.I want 2 be like that with him 2 cause it feels great 2 have that freedom.The prob is I can`t bring myself 2 really let go of my insecurities and trust him.He has no female friends and never gives me a reason 2 distrust him but the other night a girl called and didnt say anything and hung up on me then wouldnt answer when I called back. I know it was a girl cause I got her vcmail.The number was programmed in his ph as "F" Needless 2 say I kind of freaked out and didn`t believe him when he said he didnt know anything about it.Come 2 find out it was all a mistake and was someone he was buying a fridge from.(F for fridge,duh!). How do I make myself just trust and believe him the way he does me? Is it possible?
2006-08-04
07:02:06
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19 answers
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asked by
Ex-Blondie
3
in
Family & Relationships
➔ Singles & Dating
Every guy that I talk to or am friends knows that I am VERY happy with him and want nothing from them but friendship. I make it well known that I am taken and happy to be that way and have no desire to be with any other man on this planet. He does the same with everyone we meet.
2006-08-04
07:20:46 ·
update #1
It is possible to trust. It sounds like you have a really good guy on your hands and he sounds like someone who definitely deserves to be trusted. Have you had experiences in the past where a guy has made you think you could trust him and he was lying to you about something? If so, just let it go and don't focus on that. It seems that you're unsure if you really want to be with your current boyfriend. Believe me, inconsistency with trust is not a good thing. It ends up hurting both people in the relationship. If you don't see yourself committing to your boyfriend, then try not to get so flustered about the little things. It seems like you may be creating a double standard because you get jealous or whatnot when it seems that he's cheating or lying to you, which he isn't even doing. I think it also depends on how long the two of you have been in a relationship. If it's been a year or more, then I think it's definitely something worth holding onto. He must really want to be with you if he seems so laid back about you talking to other guys. He trusts you, so you should give him the same respect and trust him. If you can't learn to trust him, then I think the relationship should end now. Without trust, you really have nothing. Communication is also key. If you know each other pretty well, you should be able to talk to each other about this trust thing openly. Maybe he can give you some insight as to why he's so laid back about the situation and perhaps talking through it can also help give insight as to some insecurities you may have. It's amazing the way the mind works sometimes. Discussing what and how you're truly feeling can help reveal inner thoughts you never realized were there before. I hope this helps.
2006-08-04 07:17:53
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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I feel that you just are not able to be trained to believe once more however, that simplest is determined by how dangerous the believe was once damaged. Lets say the man or woman was once nearly you they usually did some thing to damage your center and the believe was once misplaced. It could take a little time notably if you're regularly w, anyone that you'll on no account believe r you're regularly wasting believe in others. I could take a little time out for self and simply be trained approximately you. It will probably be heard however, you have got to do it. Start through studying individual progress books to higher your self, Read approximately believe, and the that means, love, fact in relationships. those books are all in the market and now not for exhibit they're there to aid folks and that i feel that they may be able to aid you too. Good Luck and I desire I replied your query to the great of my potential.
2016-08-28 12:44:42
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answer #2
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answered by ? 4
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It takes time for a person to earn trust in another. This isn't just done in a day or so. It could even take longer should a person have been with someone else that they indeed did trust and that person got screwed around. Take your time and little by little you will trust this guy as long as he follows the right path.
2006-08-04 07:09:54
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answer #3
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answered by Gez 2
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I want you to trust him
but that story is messed up
thats a really hard one because of the fact he labled her as F and she hung up the phone thats just weird.
I don't think u need to learn to trust maybe just do some investagating
I have no trust in any of my boyfriends cause they always cheet and i hope someday my trust can be taken back but that story is so hard to believe.
I would say drop it this time but keep your eyes open it sounds like u care about him alot
2006-08-04 07:06:56
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answer #4
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answered by Coxie Megan 4
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It is possible , but it is also hard as hell. Make sure you guys tallk out your trust issues together- it is important to know and have out on the table what issues you have- after clear them up with each other. Make sure you talk about everything that you are worried about and he do the same. Please don't insist that he is doing anything wrong- talk about it & spy- that can only cause things to be worst than they are, we don't want you to puhs him away!
I have & am still going through it with my "fiance" and we cleared a lot of things up. The most important thng to keep in mind is, "Do you honestly trust him 110%?"
2006-08-04 07:13:49
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answer #5
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answered by lokokh1983 1
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Prayer, I know this sounds obvious, but whenever we are trying to control things around us it causes problems. Right know you are obsessing about this, you don't have any reason not to trust, but still your mind won't allow you to let it go. This will inevitably destroy any good relationship. Prayer will relieve your anxiousness and give you peace. Until you have a real reason not to trust then enjoy the beautiful person God put in your life.
2006-08-04 07:14:50
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answer #6
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answered by wiseroxy 1
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I don't think it's something magical that happens. It's something you have to make an effort to do with every situation that comes up. I've been in relationships where I've been hurt, so I know how you feel. It's very hard to trust after you've been hurt.
2006-08-04 07:09:09
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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You probably have some trust issues with previous relationships huh!! He's a different person and shouldn't be punished for other people's mistakes. I don't know if that is why but you just need to start trusting him! or maybe not! Maybe he is cheating and your gut feeling is telling you he is but you don't see it!
2006-08-04 07:06:41
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answer #8
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answered by lila 1
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Go with your heart. You have been playing alittle it seems by receiving guy's phone#'s and email address. Is it you on some level don't think your relationship is that strong or want last long? It could be you a guilty inside on someway and looking to convict him. What you need to do is decide this is who I am going to be with and block out those other jokers, then you will start feeling secure.
2006-08-04 07:12:19
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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dont worry some of use to take time to know someone and trust better. but trust and respect is the basis for a good relationship
2006-08-04 07:07:33
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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