they are 21, 22 and 24
2006-08-04 05:48:15 · 7 answers · asked by lovelady 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Stop treating them like children...most young adults who won't grow have parents who swoop in like a mother hen whenever there's a problem. Let them know that they have to solve their own problems, or they'll never learn (or be motivated to). Next "crisis" that comes up, listen to them, but stop there. As hard as it will be, don't give them a solution, or money, or a car, or a place to crash. Short of their becoming homeless, do nothing. (And I mean wait 'til they call you from the shelter, okay?) This is the only way overly dependent young adults will ever grow up and take care of their own issues. Otherwise, you'll be supporting them and putting out their copious fires well into their forties...Got it?
2006-08-04 06:09:01 · answer #1 · answered by wendy g 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
1. Never tell them they're acting like kids. They'll only get more rebellious that way ...and do everything to prove you right !
2. Start making them do some of their own chores. And appreciate what they do. (Even if it means correcting the mess they've made, after they leave.)
3. Make it clear that you'll always be around for them, but they have to take responsibility for their own acts ...and lives.
4. Set a good example, by doing yourself what you want / expect them to do.
5. Don't keep nagging.
6. Give them space.
2006-08-04 06:00:45 · answer #2 · answered by Meh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe they lacked responsibility when they were young and you followed them around doing everything for them instead of teaching them how to do it themselves. Sometimes it s just easier to do things to get them done rather than waiting for someone else to do it.
Tell them to get a job, pay you rent and start charging them for your services such as cooking and laundry. They will get the hint. If they don't have the cash to have to do their work then nothing gets done. Start acting like their landlord instead of their mother.
Stop treating them like babies and make sure they are to do what they need to get done.
Good luck!
2006-08-04 05:58:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't allow them too. Do they have jobs? Are they paying rent? How exactly to they act like kids and are you enabling them?
2006-08-04 06:05:09 · answer #4 · answered by grudgrime 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to get "adult" with them. I told my son, if he wants to act like a man and sleep with his stepmom, I will treat you like a man, and I slept with his girlfriend.
2006-08-04 05:58:48 · answer #5 · answered by Dialup, Avatar, Jones! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't make them understand anything, they are kids still, let them have their fun.
2006-08-04 05:58:36 · answer #6 · answered by Sue 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They will after you no longer keep rescuing them.
Good luck!
2006-08-04 05:53:19 · answer #7 · answered by Raspberry 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋