My bf and I have been dating for 6 years, and when I brought up the idea of us getting married he said marriage was a just a legal document, a mere legal formality bounded by joint accounts and financial burdens...is this true? Does love have nothing to do with two people getting married anymore?
2006-08-04 03:00:29 · 9 answers · asked by monavyas15 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Different people see things differently. I can only tell you what I think but you should have your own opinion about it. I believe marriage is not that important if you are not planning to have a family just yet. It's better to live together and enjoy the relationship. Being married won't change much unless you want to have kids. Then I believe people should get married, if they are in love. I know it's great to be engaged, I'd want that with my boy as well, but men usually see things like that as unnecessary unless they are completely sure you're the one they want to spend their lives with. That's how it is. And love, well, it does have to do with marriage, I wouldn't recommend getting married if there's no love, even if there are kids as it will fall apart one day anyway. But if for your boy is not important to get married and it is for you, try to talk to him about it. Relationships are all about compromise, one of you will have to do it.
best of luck
2006-08-04 03:10:34 · answer #1 · answered by justice4all 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My opinion is that yes, it's a legal thing. Also a religious issue if you believe. But I think "standing before God" has probably already been done if there's a real commitment. If the marriage is going to work it should be able to before the marriage. I firmly believe in people living together if that's what they feel works for them. The rate of divorce should prove that marriage is not going to hold things together by itself.
I propose "contract marriage" for those in doubt. A legally binding contract that a couple will be treated as married for a set length of time and how to divide things if the contract is ended. There's more to it, but I think that would drastically alter the divorce rate.
2006-08-04 03:26:43 · answer #2 · answered by Wahrsuul 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Joint accounts and financial burdens?.....cop out! Being married is an expression of love that says to the world, "This is who I chose to love til death." He may just want to keep the options open(yknawhimean:o). Maybe I'm wrong, but I think its an excuse because people were getting married before finances were such a BIG issue.
2006-08-04 03:31:49 · answer #3 · answered by Amazon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My ex said that too, gave me a ring that looked like a crackerjack box escapee, and would NEVER help me set a date. His answer to people's question of when we were going to get married was "someday." I set his *** out.
The dude obviously isn't worth your time if you've been together for 6 years with no form of commitment like a diamond ring or golden band.
Move on. You'll find somebody that really loves you and wants to be legally bonded to you.
2006-08-04 03:12:41 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sure does!! Its also a major committment to each other. Sounds like your bf is either afraid to make the committment, or leaving his options open in case something better comes along. Or his views are messed up based on his experiences. You have the right idea!! You should ask yourself .... can you (or do you) REALLY want to live like that? Don't lower your standards for ANYONE !!
2006-08-04 03:08:15 · answer #5 · answered by LoneWolf 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i have always looked at it that way,my guy and i lived together for 8 years before we got married, and i only said yes to him after getting bugged by his parents for those 8 years, love and commitment can not be solidified by the paper. only in the heart of the people who share the feeling.we have been together for 35 years now,and the license has only caused more fights, cause he now thinks I'm the one that bugged him to get it. it hurts his ego to remember that i was the one who didn't want the license.
2006-08-04 03:36:52 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um.... Well I guess he has a point if you look at it from one angle. It is also about standing up in front of God (if you believe...) the state, your friends and family and saying from now one, for the rest of my life I choose this person ahead of every one else.
If you don't love them then you are probably not going to be able to do it.
2006-08-04 03:07:17 · answer #7 · answered by kllr.queen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he thinks that if you guys ever break up he doesn't wanna give u his house, half his earnings, spend $600 plus attorney fees to leave you.
2006-08-04 03:23:41 · answer #8 · answered by WEEBLEZ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is a religious institution, then the government needs to stay out of gay marriage.
2016-03-26 22:51:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋