My last question concerned my daughter's less intelligent partner. This time it is about his even less intelligent parents. They, his mother in particular, do not approve of his being with my daughter who they consider stuck up and middle class. I think they are afraid of his growing further away from them. He already had - it was my daughter who encouraged him to try and have a relationship with them, especially with the arrival of the baby. But he is not very articulate himself and they cannot really communicate how they feel. It seems the mother always gets emotional and accusative then sulks and my daughter's boyfriend gets hurt. The mother accuses him and my daughter of believing that she and her ways are not good enough for them. She has fallen out with other members of the family, and her neighbours and the father just keeps out of it. My daughter is afraid she'll be a bad (negative) influence on my granddaughter but thinks her partner needs to keep in contact. Advice?
2006-08-04 02:06:06 · 7 answers · asked by granny2006 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Time to have a family meeting...........the 2 of them with the WHOLE family and tell them exactly how they feel, obviously this girl cares about his relationship with his family as she has encouraged him to be closer to them.
They need to be the ones to listed to what is said and take it to heart.
They may be blaming her for their lack of relationship with the son as blaming others is usually the easiest way out.
2006-08-04 02:11:34 · answer #1 · answered by koleebear 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If her partner wants to stay away from his mother then she shouldn't stop him. Your daughter and child should be the important ones here - not his mother. She sounds like a spiteful bully who is used to getting her own way. I had something similar but could ignore it by thinking they (the family) were like something out of Shameless and without a brain cell between them. I wasn't too wrong. They came from Gorton too, honest.
If his father's OK and just keeps out of it your daughter or her partner could maybe ask him what his mother's problem is and he could maybe tell her to back off.
Otherwise, I'd tell your daughter not to go round and if questions are asked they should be told why. She could risk being called 'soft' then though and they would have another reason to have a go at her.
I can't understand your daughter telling her partner he must see his mother though when she is so sadistic.
Good luck.
2006-08-04 02:18:22 · answer #2 · answered by Iluv24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The grandparent isn't going to make the grandchild any better or less. As long as your daughter and the baby doesn't live with them, I think they will be alright. When the child grows up he/she will look at them and wonder why they never wanted to better themselves. I have the same situation with me. My dads parents are like that, and didn't want him to marry my mom, so they have taken it out on me and my brother. We could tell that they didn't have anything for us early in our lives, and we refuse to go over there for every occasion. The child will realize what is going on. I am 23 now and i haven't talked to or seen my dads parents since i was 13, and i don't want to.
2006-08-04 02:14:46 · answer #3 · answered by jennifer_spanky2002 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
reading something like this makes me feel better. don't take me wrong but i am rocking in the same boat as your daughter and sometimes I feel so alone and depressed!!
Unfortunately, I cannot give you any good advice to pass on to your daughter. Just tell her to be patient and if she and her partner are in love, they should do all possible to keep their love strong because I am afraid that in such situation (myself) I am feeling that our love is diminishing!
If their son choose this girl over others it surely must make them realize that she is good for him and what is good for him does not have to be good for them...a relationship is just like food and drink
I really hope that your daughter settles this situation ASAP, and I wish her all the best. If you want you can contact me and let me know if things got better or not.
2006-08-04 02:15:22 · answer #4 · answered by trushka 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
with all due respect, it is up to your daughter and her husband to deal with them or not. you should be a silent observer and a supporter if the chips fall.
2006-08-04 02:14:48 · answer #5 · answered by sinned 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are very judgemental and need to mind your own business.
2006-08-04 02:11:58 · answer #6 · answered by A G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her to send the ***** to hell and not talk to her
2006-08-04 02:13:33 · answer #7 · answered by Joe V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋