my friends b/f and her have been dating for about a year now they have been living together ever since they started dating he has been in a marriage before and now hes divorced and they have everything u can dream about having to start a family but he doesnt wanna have kids as yet and no he doesnt have any from the last relationship wat can she do she really wants to have a family of her own how can she show him dat starting a family wid the man she loves is reallyyyy important to her?? SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLYYYY....
2006-08-03 23:47:11 · 7 answers · asked by jenn 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
he said he wants to adopt kids but why isnt he ready to have one of his own?
2006-08-03 23:55:11 · update #1
There are several things I question here. Why is she living with him. If she is good enough to live with why not marry her. I think about the old saying," why buy the cow when you can get the milk free". Both of them should go to counseling. Maybe there is a reason he does not want kids either from his childhood or previous relationship. Whatever the reason it needs to be brought to the open and discussed honestly. If she can accept the reasoning for him not wanting children, then okay. If she really wants a family with kids, then she has some decisions to make. Don't rush into anything but I would stongly suggest professional counseling. I hope this helps! Good Luck.
2006-08-04 00:02:18 · answer #1 · answered by ADRIENNE S G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
gee a tough one mate, I spose first off , how long have they been together ?? He obviously has been through one bad experience and would be a little shall we say "standoffish" about that kind of commitment. If your friend really loves him and it sounds like she does she should take her time for the first 12 months or so, tell him then how important a family is to her, if he truley loves her he will let her know his true feelings on the matter, if its still a no to kids then she may have to make a very tough call, these very important things could eat at her if left too long after that
2006-08-04 07:01:25 · answer #2 · answered by dilligafe_13 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he doesnt want kids that doesnt mean he doesnt love him
is that when u hav kids u cant hav the enjoyment u r now havin its jst that u vant go to regularly when u hav kids after 6-7 yrs he comes home and kids runnin around demandin somethin or the other and his wife comes out complanin abt the kids and 20 yrs later kids r to busy to care for their folks abd they r sent to the old age homes comin only on yur birthdays n 10 yrs l8r watin for u to die and give them their share i think he is aware of these things
2006-08-04 07:01:19 · answer #3 · answered by Angad 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he wants to adopt have you ever thuoght he might not be able to have kids 7 maybe thats why his previous marriage had failed. Tell your friend she needs to talk to him about this because it could destroy there relationship if she is putting presure on him to have children
2006-08-04 07:11:56 · answer #4 · answered by scarlet pimpernell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he said no kids ever or no kids yet? There's a big difference. If he's just not ready yet, she needs to accept that, if he's said no kids ever, she might need to move on with her life even if it hurts.
2006-08-04 06:52:05 · answer #5 · answered by Kanga_tush2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She needs to just sit with him and explain how she feels and see if he will compromise with her on it.
-NmD!
2006-08-04 06:54:08 · answer #6 · answered by NoMaD! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you her? Sounds terribly serious here.
2006-08-04 06:52:32 · answer #7 · answered by Kanda 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋