I asked a question a week or so ago whether it was wrong off me to be annoyed that my boyfriend looks at porn. the problem was he couldnt be bothered with sex and stuff but could masterbate when i wasnt about! i am 13 years younger and have a high sex drive and i feel unsatisfied but the worst is knowing my partner would rather **** than be with me he just cant be bothered always too tired or something. now since then we have had a big showdown and he begged me not to leave saying he would never do it again, because he didnt want to lose me. and for the first time in ages we actually were getting on great because i actually trusted him. but now i have seen that even though he promised and begged he is still actually looking at the poorn. i told him if i found out again i would leave and that i meant and i thought he actually listened but obviously not. what should i do!!
2006-08-03 22:48:02 · 22 answers · asked by ? 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
There should be no "next time." If he had cared enough about your relationship, he would have done as you asked. But he didn't because he doesn't care and he knows that you won't leave him. He knows he has you wrapped around his finger and he'll continue to do as he pleases. I say leave him and let it go. If he doesn't come back, it wasn't meant to be. You know the saying... You shouldn't ever have to sacrifice your happiness or satisfaction in a relationship. It is in fact a relationship...where BOTH partners sacrifice a little.
2006-08-03 22:56:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a real toughy. If you really can't stand the fact he looks at porn what choice do you have but to leave. I think most blokes will admit that they wouldn't stop looking at porn just because you asked them.... You have to either get used to the idea he will watch porn or leave him. If you DO get over the idea, you still have to address the issue that he's not bothered enough to have sex with you. I speak from personal experience when I say this is a tough one - for me the issue was not the porn, but the thought he could be doing it with another girl.... I now believe he loves me and is faithful, but he still can't be arsed to have sex as often as I'd like it. Can't give you an answer to that one as I haven't found it yet. be sure to tell me if you find it! Good luck.
2006-08-03 22:58:29 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If it bothers you that much and he is infact not interested in you sexually you should let him go and find someone else. I love porn myself. I have well over 300 titles but it is no substitution to the real thing. There are times when I would rather "watch" than participate. Maybe he is a hardcore voyeour. Maybe he gets off by watching. I've got an idea. How about you tape yourself masturbating and let him watch that. Or even tape yourselves having sex so he can watch that and maybe that will get him interested in you again.
2006-08-03 22:59:28 · answer #3 · answered by makeherwett 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
if its not working and ur not happy dont stay there and suffer in silence, plenty of younger men with high sex drives out there. there is nothing wrong with watching porn it can spice up a sex life no end but if hes too lazy to put in the effort and would rather pleasure himself instead of sharing the experience with u then dump this looser now u will do so much better for urself good luck.
2006-08-03 22:58:33 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, you've got yourself a situation here. It's an addiction and he needs more help than you leaving him. He should seek help if he wants to keep you. It is some guys fantasy to act out what they're seeing, or do the girl they're watching, OR they just like seeing a piece of *ss get butchered by another man. See to it that he gets help, or leave.
2006-08-03 22:56:20 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
ok... most guys look at porn... kind of a normal thing... however if he's more interested in porn than actually having sex, then he's got a serious problem. sounds like he needs some sort of help. however, if he's not willing to seek out help, then you don't really have much choice but to leave him. there's no point in hanging around if your partner won't try to overcome his addiction. if he's willing to make a decent effort to change, then maybe give him one more chance and be supportive? otherwise get out.
2006-08-05 03:01:57 · answer #6 · answered by Andrew L 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The truth is that although he MAY be addicted to porn you need to provide a superior alternative. If you love him then you need to call upon all of your feminine assets and lure him with your erotic charms.
Buy some sexy underwear. Learn massage....., find out how to give spectular oral sex (that will win him over for sure!!!!!!!) and learn how to be sassy and irresistable to him.
If this does not work then boot him out.
Viking xxx
2006-08-03 23:58:55 · answer #7 · answered by Viking 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it's a way of having variety without actually cheating.
you could try sharing his problem by learning to give him handjobs, perhaps while he's watching the porn.
it's possible that doing something like that will revive his interest in you.
also, learning to stimulate him may allow you to initiate sex.
Age, and lack of interest, can happen to many men. Sharing the foreplay is often the best response within a marriage.
2006-08-03 23:03:51 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get rid. come find a man with a high sex drive like urs (loads of us out here). Things arent going to get better. think of all the fun u could b having
2006-08-03 22:53:19 · answer #9 · answered by ???????????? 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
He's a bloke and porns are filled with naked women. Need I say more?
And masturbation is inevitable! Unless he chooses to masturbate and not have sex with you then I don't see a problem in your relationship. And just because he masturbates doesn't mean he doesn't want sex with you. If he enjoys it so much then why don't you "include" yourself into his sessions...give him a real life porno...no red-blooded guy would turn that down. Honest.
(a problem only arises if it's gay porn you're talking about...in that case I'd like to say...oops!)
2006-08-04 07:35:05 · answer #10 · answered by binga 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋