I am reposting this question from curious one. sorry it is mighty long...?

Question

but do take the time to read please..

My life is a complete mess...?

I'm about to completely give up. I'm a 22yr old lesbian female living at home with mom for the 2nd time due to a coke addiction which I'm completely over. I'm super depressed, always have anxiety attacks, can't control my mood swings. I've tried working, it makes me want to commit suicide EVERY time and i end up quitting or being fired. It's basically come down to work or die. And I'm considering death, because if I work I'm just going to feel like dying anyways. It's not the work that bothers me.. it's the environment, the people looking at me, etc. I've tried working tons of places. I was even a salon manager, but still the feelings stayed.
So... I'm in debt. Obviously I need a job. I'm about to most likely have a surgery due to a fibroid in my uterus, which puts me more in debt. I don't know what to do. I'm taking Effexor, the highest dose. I can't just 'get over' things..I've tried since the day I was born

Also, if you come across Curious One, please tell her about your answer here...she has not left an email id..thanks in advance...eskay

Answer 1

Homeopathy :-
Take AURUM MET 200C thrice a day on the first day and after that just once a day about half hour before going to bed always on an empty stomach meaning nothing to eat half hour before and after taking the remedy you will overcome your depression for keeps in a few days. It is made out of pure gold and has no side effects or doesnt causes any complications. Try it you will be cured of your emotional disorders and depression very fast.
Wishing you all the best.
Take care and God Bless you !

Answer 2

don't give up...

look at what you accoml=plished by getting off of cocaine. that is a major hurdle! i mean it pat yourself on the back if no one else has.

go to a different therapist if the one you are seeing isn't working (you are seeing one aren't you?)

therapy is really important when dealing with chronic severe depression.

i have the same issues that you do as far as the work thing goes. i cannot hold a job for many of the same reasons you mentioned. i barely leave the house because i don't want people staring at me (or touching me).

apply for SSI at least temporarily and later you can try to go back to work.

thank the lucky stars above that you have mom to help you out.

maybe effexor isn't the right meds for you. what about wellbutrin?

you should also ask for a mood stabilizer (neurontin, or topomax) for your mood swings and an anti-anxiety drug like clonazepam (klonepin) or clorazepam (ativan) ativan is less likely to "stone you out."

suicide is never the answer. you need to think about how that would affect the ones who love you. suicide is a chicken **** and selfish move.

hang in there things will surely get better.

just today i saw a lady in a wheel chair pushing a baby in a stroller down the street. some jack *** in a car almost ran her over and didn't even look back. there is always someone out there who has it worse than you (or me).

it'll be ok, i promise.

Answer 3

If you suffer from Anxiety Disorder and Chronic Depression, you are more than likely eligable for SSI or SSA. Free money from the Gov't for not being able to work due to your disorders. It may take a few years to finally get approved, but however long you have to wait, the more money you get. Durring the wait, the checks keep adding up and you get a lump sum when u qualify. If you qualify, then you could apply for HUD Low income housing for people with disabilities and you will automaticly be approved once you have SSI or SSA. You will then only have to pay 30% of your income towards rent and the gov't will pay the rest. So there is help out there for ppl in your situation so stay strong and take action and take advantage of the programs that are designed to help ppl like you. God Bless!

Answer 4

Well, first, you need to realize that the people you work with have no idea about your past and, therefore, when they look in your direction or talk to you, they are NOT judging you. Unless you tell them something about yourself they will know absolutely nothing about your sexual orientation or addiction. If they are judging you it has nothing to do with any of that, most likely they would be making judgments on your hair or clothing. All people do that.
Listen to me, you need to stop thinking that people that work with you are concerned about anything you might have done. THEY DON'T CARE. They have problems of their own and they are worried about what's going on in their own life. They don't have time to worry about what's gone on in yours.
If it weren't for the fact that you have no income I'd recommend that you get counseling so you could get over some of your self destructive thinking. So I'm just going to tell you that you are just another hurting person walking the earth in a damaged condition. This is tragic but not unique. There are millions just like you. Everyone has problems and many of them are very severe. You need to stop thinking that you are SO different than anyone else that everyone knows who you are and what you've done. THEY DO NOT. You look just like everyone else to anyone who sees you.
If you gave people half a chance you might find out that they can be compassionate and friendly. Some of them even have worse stories than yours which, I might think, would make you feel VERY relieved.

Answer 5

Welcome to the club.

I'm an abortion survivor.

My family is a dysfunctional piece of garbage.

My mother's a F****** W-H-0-R-3.

Four years ago, my grandparents were murdered by their sons and daughters (my mom was also an accomplice since she's the daughter of my grandparents).

Those BAS***DS took my inheritance and got the whole F****** town in their pocket.

I became a drunk and a suicide basket case. I left my home to go someplace to die alone.

Yeah, after two years, I'm still alive and kicking. In fact I quit drinking altogether.

No perscription drugs, no shrinks, no therapy, no self-help, no AA.....

Just pure raw hate of what I've become and the will to live which later on brought me to Islam.

Hate and at the same time accept what you've become and use that hate to better yourself. If in the process, you find "Divine Guidance" regarless of religion, so much the better as long as it keeps you focused on surviving.

Good luck. God Bless.

Answer 6

It is time to take control of your life like right now. I used Crack for two years and one day I decided it's time to move on and that was fifteen years ago and I have not touched it ever since.
You must be strong and have will power to move on in life. Build up your selfesteem.
Nobody cared about you who did drugs with you. You must take care of you.
Start from scratch and slowly pick away at the mountain one chip ata time until you are totally back on your feet and back in the lane of ships sailing and your gonna do it when you say I am ready to then do it.

Answer 7

Effexor is not a good drug to be taking if you have suicidal thoughts or tendencies. My husband committed suicide while taking Effexor, and he's not the only one that has. There are tons of lawsuits because of this. She needs to RUN to her doctor and tell them what is happening. There is help out there.

Answer 8

it sounds like you have been down a long hard road. you have worked hard to kick that cocaine addiction now you must get on with other things here. have you been talking with a professional the mental resource center / crisis center are good avenues right now i take it you don't have insurance so this would probally be a good route. you don't want to die you have thru hell and come out of it so get that thought out of your head the jobs are going to be tough at first but you need one at least part=time at first something that makes you feel good about yourself!!! don't give up but i stringly sugest you get help now before things get worse
you can do this!!!! take care

Answer 9

Contact me I'm a Lesbian. Maybe my words of wisdom might help you, hon! Don't opt out on life your so young and have a lot to offer. I felt the same you did many yrs. ago, when I too was around your age, but now it's hasn't been as bad as I am 45. Be strong little one, I care!

Answer 10

It seems like you live in a life style that you are not to comfortable with and you are trying to change the outside. Try taking some coping skills classes to cope with yourself in the here and now and if change is needed on the inside then take coping classes to cope with that.