How can i communicate with the cockroaches in my house ???
I have tried everything but all they do is stare at me all the time...i guess they r plain DUMB......
How can i talk to them??
2006-08-03 20:02:20 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
all u need is antlers .... well now that u dont have real ones ... u need to get artificial ones.... but one prob ... u cant get them frm the prescribed dealers ... coz of ur age ..... so wat i feel is that u do an experiment ... on urself ..... welll to start with ... u'll hav to write a note telling that u r upto a mischievous experiment ... n watever b the outcome u'll b responsible.... now that u've done this ... place it in ur diapers ... n set on the experiment.... take the "singh_utpanna" compound in the test tube ... (well if u dont hav it ... contact me through email....i'll manage it 4 u )... yup ... now u need 2 drops of H2SO4... b sure u tilt the tube sideways b4 adding the acid ... n mind u dont b careful while handling it .. if u drop it on ur hands or somewhere it wud work wonders....well now u've heated it .... now gently pour it on ur head .... sideways in two places to get the two antlers ....
....yes now that u've performed the experiment ... u need not worry anymore ... coz if the experiment is a success .. u'll have perfect antlers ... n even if it fails ... u'll have 2 balloons on the head ...quite good for antlers ...
ok now u have either the antlers or balloons ... now u can easily communicate with cockroaches ... all u need to do is make ur antlers dance just like those of cockroaches ... for this u need to tickle ... perfect ... now u r talking!!!
.... all the best for ur experiment ... n may u b successful in making that cockroach ur friend on this special day ... hihihihi;)
.........HAPPY FRIENDSHIP DAY .... ;)
2006-08-06 06:30:31 · answer #1 · answered by simply_boring 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first bagbalm catdew rocks! hahahaha
Now onto the problem at hand.
I personally have never met a cockroach I liked, but if you insist.
All you have to do is pull ones head off. It will walk around for 2 weeks without it, looking for the head. This is a real fact about roaches man. they are too dumb to talk to. you have to use other means of communicating, and the best one is the use of pesticide. they know what your talking about when they see the Raid coming at them.
2006-08-04 14:23:03 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
with a tin foil helmet and a septer made of dried iguana terd
simply place the helmet on your head and point the septer in the cockroaches general direction, lick the end of the septer and your should now be able to talk to them
either that or go rent Joes apartment, mabey the answer is in there some where
2006-08-04 03:09:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, hehehehh ...I can't stop laughing...the cockroaches staring at u...? maybe they are thinking.....hehe..How did god create such a charming and intelligent one and just made him 6 mnths old.....? well, u r having the brain of a 100 yr old....and evn the cockroaches can't believe it...I guess they are admiring u..to be like u......or maybe...oops..this is funny!! did u eat last time sumthing like a roundball, a white one...na, nnot bread(bread is round??) oh, the one ur mamma puts under cupboards and all....gat it? Oh, I can't stop laughing...did u REEEEEEEEEEEAALLY eat that>???? why in the wold did u eat moth balls??? oh, my god! this naughty one..maybe that's why they are staring at u...they may be wondering coz, u r the only one they have seen eating their poison! maybe they want u to eat evry mothballs so that they culd move arnd peacefully !! or have u sprayed RAID on ur body, thinking they are perfumes???
anyways to communicate with them is a little tough....coz ....It's hard, that's it...ok, if u really wanna communicate try this...When u see a cockroach, give a good smile...na, don't show ur gums...they wuld go away..ok, smile? then u can see the cockroache's whiskers moving...if it moves straight , it says :'Hey, u look so cute' ( note:this is obviously a girl cockroach, see her wordings!!....na, stop smiling..otherwise ishewuld follow u evrytime!!) If it says:'Hey, U r strong enugh to be my servant', don't mind ...that one is the stupidest ever cockroach u have seen...if the cockroache's whiskers' move left...it says...: ok, I have seen u.....Nice to meet u', if moving to right it says...'Oh, well, u aren't big enugh to meet me' hehe...ok, u wanna talk back.....u have to use ur head...move ur head towards cockroach...na, not too near...it wuld fly up to ur mouth..and close ur mouth evrytime ! Ok, with a head nod yes...u r saying..I trust u, shall we be frnds....nod to left...u say..U r not good enugh..nod to left , u say....Is there any cockroach armies up there in ur kingdom(that's truely what u need..ain't it? ) Well, This much I have learned...start and u wuld be a good talker soon....
Beware: If at any time of ur talk, the cockroache's whiskers goes up and down and left and right , all in a minute...then I wuld say....
RUN....don't waste a minute.......
2006-08-05 18:18:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try writing everything you want to say backwards on a piece of paper, dipping the paper in ranch dressing, and washing it in the sink with the hot water gently dripping for 2 minutes. Then place the paper in front of the roach and hear the distinct chirps. The number of chirps corresponds to a different answer. For example, 1 chirp is no, 2 is yes... for the list, go to wikipedia or some encyclopedia.
2006-08-04 03:12:18 · answer #5 · answered by David 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
SEE what you should do is put your foot down and show them who is the boss. Go to your local 99 cent store buy some raid spray,raid combats which comes with the raid jel. put that S*** all around your house and then they would know who is the boss! That would teach them not to F*** with you.
2006-08-04 12:37:42 · answer #6 · answered by yaya t 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to play an instrument. Then you can be the Pied Piper of India, and lead them all into the sea.
2006-08-04 03:25:03 · answer #7 · answered by 42ITUS™ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
All they say is that they want to fry you and are going to start a nuclear war against you, and humanity.
Its nothing that special.
2006-08-04 10:40:34 · answer #8 · answered by iam"A"godofsheep 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to put them in your mouth , that's the only way you can get their attention , if they think your going to bite them they will talk like mad to you .
2006-08-04 03:11:20 · answer #9 · answered by joegossum 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you cannot kill them , then you better leave and forget the communication.
2006-08-04 03:17:18 · answer #10 · answered by JoJoBa 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋