Wanna tell me a joke?

Question

Please??

=)

Answer 1

I will tell you a good joke but can I PLEASE have 10points.

Differences Between Men And Women In The Shower

Shower Habits Of Men And Women
How to Shower Like a Woman
1. Take off fourteen layers of clothing you put on this morning.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing robe and towel on head. If you happen to see husband along the way, ignore juvenile "turban-head" jokes and run to bathroom.
3. Look at womanly physique in mirror and stick out stomach so as to complain about how fat you're getting.
4. Turn on hot water only.
5. Get in the shower, once you've found it through all the steam.
6. Look for facecloth, armcloth, legcloth, long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.
7. Wash hair once with cucumber and lemon shampoo with 83 added vitamins.
8. Rinse hair. Condition your hair with cucumber and lemon conditioner enhanced with natural crocus oil. Leave on hair for fifteen minutes.
9. Wash face with crushed apricot facial scrub for ten minutes until red and raw.
10. Try to wash entire rest of body with Ginger Nut and Java Cake bodywash.
11. Complain bitterly when you realize that your husband has once again been EATING your ginger nut and java cake body wash.
12. Rinse conditioner off hair (this takes at least fifteen minutes, as you must make sure that all the conditioner has come off).
13. Debate shaving armpits and legs and decide that you can't be bothered.
14. Scream loudly when your husband flushes the toilet and you get a rush of cold water.
15. Turn hot water on full and rinse off.
16. Dry with a towel the size of a small African country.

How to Shower Like a Man
1. Sit on the edge of the bed and take off the underwear you've walking around the house in all morning. Leave them on the floor.
2. Walk to bathroom wearing a towel. If you see your wife along the way, flash her.
3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Pat your beer belly with affection as if it was a great achievement. Suck in your gut to see if you have pecs. (No.)
4. Turn on the water.
5. Check for pecs again. (Still no.)
6. Get in the shower.
7. Don't bother to look for a washcloth. (You don't use one.)
8. Spend 5 minutes soaping your body and rinse.
9. Spend 15 minutes washing your crotch and surrounding area.
10. Wash your rear end.
11. Shampoo your hair, do not use conditioner.
12. Make a shampoo mohawk.
13. Open the door and look at yourself in the mirror, giggle.
14. Pee.
15. Repeat #9, because it felt good.
16. Rinse off and get out of the shower.
17. Pick up the towel and sniff it. If it smells okay, go ahead and dry off with it. If it doesn't smell okay, holler to your wife to find you a clean one.
18. Return to the bedroom wearing the towel; if you pass your wife, flash her.

Answer 2

okay, here is one for you.

Topic: Cheap Perfume

Once upon a time there was an old lady entering an empire state building and she approaches the elavator. As the old lady gets in the elevator, she pressed the button and it keeps going up. Suddenly, the elevator stopped and the 1st young lady enter the elevator. Then, the old lady smell the extremely expensive perfume, look and smile at the first young woman. The woman then arrogantly tells her "Ralph Lauren(perfume), 100 bucks per ounce." The elevator continues to move up and stops and then a 2nd young lady gets in the elevator. The old lady again smells another kind of perfume and smiles at the 2nd lady. The 2nd one said, "Chanel No.5 perfume, 200 bucks per ounce."

As soon as the old lady reaches her final destination on the elevator, she begins to get the 2 women a surprise. Before the old lady gets out of the elevator, she bends her whole upper torso body over, then she farts loudly and said "broccoli, 49 cents per pound."

Answer 3

three little boys were talking the first one says " when I grow up I want to be a professor like my dad and drive a BMW" the second little boy says " When I grow up I wanna be a doctor and drive a Mercedes Benz like my dad" The third litle bot says "when I grow up Im gona play pro sports and drive a Jaguar like my dad" A fourth little boy that had overheard the other three says"When I grow up I wanna have hair all over my body!" Why? said the other three boys?? The fourth little boy says " cause my sister only got a tiny patch of hair between her legs and she has all those cars!!"

Answer 4

George Bush has three words for you...Happy Birthday!

Answer 5

Wanna hear a joke....I fart ..you choke!
Wanna hear another...I SH1T...you smother!

Answer 6

what is green and red and goes ninety miles an hour?

Answer 7

why didn't the chicken cross the road?
he was too chicken.

Answer 8

um, i can't think of one right now

Answer 9

nope! u r not my sis.
......and u never ask me for lunch.....
I'm hungry!!

Answer 10

No!