Would you sacrifice your happiness with a man for the sake of your children?

Question

I am so unhappy in my relationship but im afraid if i leave my child will be affected because his father plays a big role in hid life.

Answer 1

Children growing up in a broken home is already challenging enough for them..they may have hidden abandonment issues, and adding a step parent (or in some cases, just an unmarried common law dad) can be twice as stressful.

So if you as a mom do find someone you feel you're happy with, take more time and extra precaution before introducing him to your children. And be sure he is the right person for the families wellfare. This means apart from a physical relationship, will he be a long term part of the family.

Otherwise, its a strain to keep bringing astranged men into a home with children. Better off to wait til they are 18 and moving on with their life so you can pick up on your own. You owe it to them.

Answer 2

Your kids are supposed to be #1 in your life...next to ANYTHING or ANYONE!! So, the answer to your question is ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ********I made a change in my answer after I read your entire question. If you have a boyriend or husbnd that has a problem with your kids, leave him. No Mother or Father in their right mind would even think about making sure their boy/girl friend or spouse is happy before their children. Now..when you say would you sacrafice 'his happiness' for them.. well if your relationship is unhappy, trust me the kids will be much more effected if you stay..just to make him happy! It's not good for you either. Obviously try to work your relationship out first..perhaps counseling? If that doesn't work..You and your children need to live elsewhere or he does. If you're unhappy, the kids will be unhappy..whether you know it or not.. now .. please...if you are even thinking about a question like that, you need to get some counseling as well. Every Mom needs to feel their kids are IT no matter what. I sincerely hope it all works out .. I'm sure it will. Good Luck

Answer 3

This is not a question that can be answered simply. Does he know that you are unhappy? Have you tried therapy as a couple?Is he a good father? There are many things to consider before deciding to bring your children into the world of broken homes. If your husband is abusive though, to you or your children, you should leave. I honestly don't believe you will find all your answers to such a sensitive question in this type of forum.

Answer 4

I do not think any fit mother would put any man before her children.. If the kids just being a whine butt and doesn't like the man that's different but if there is a good reason then the kids always come first men are a dime a dozen and replaceable ( just like women) a child is yours for life men come and go

Answer 5

Yes, if I cannot find happiness with my children, where will I get it. The children are a part of me. The man will never be there for me but whatever happens, I will always be my children mother. My children will be the most important thing in my life, we will be a package and if the man is not willing to accept them, then I do not want him.

Answer 6

This man is presumably not your children's father. I certainly do not advise you to do that if you do not have any love for this man. This man will know that you don't love him and you are doing it because of the children. However, if he sincerely loves your children, then you can consider. But ultimately you must love him or you will end up miserable and a living 'object'. Mind you, your children will grow up and have their own family too. You will be left alone eventually.

Answer 7

My son's father abused me&cheeted. I left becouse my son would have suffered more being raised in that situation. My son never saw the abuse but he knew I was sad and hurting .Therefor he hurt too. We left when he was 4 and I told him his father and I still both love him and that will never change.
He saw his father several times a week till 2yrs ago when he went to prison.My son is now 8 and still loves his daddy veary much,but knows it's better and we are all happier now that we do not live with him.

Answer 8

If you stay becausae you want your children to have a happy home,you will end up recenting your children,get out of the relationship,you to deserve to be happy,dont sacrifice your self,you can take care of the children with out him.

Answer 9

nope not in a heart beat, because i take it that this is an abusive relationship right? well don't you think its worse for your children to see you in an abusive relationship then it would to see mommy and daddy not together but both happy. not only that if your not happy and your gonna sacrafice that for your children you will end up regreting your children which intern will one day make them regret you and you could possibly end up losing your children for good. so i would say leave him, sounds bad but o so true.

Answer 10

Kids have a way of knowing everything eventually. If you teach them about dysfunctional co-dependent relationships – there is a high probability that’s the type of person they will end up with too.