Hi, I am dating an Indian guy but his family only believes in arranged marriage. So, we have to hide our relationship and we rarely go out on a date. Is this relationship going to work out?
Are there any people with indian background can recommend me what to do? or tell me a little bit about the indian background? Why arrange marriage? What do indian parents think of their kids going out with an non-indian?
2006-08-03 15:34:50 · 11 answers · asked by polinatora 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
They probably fear the unknown. Assuage their fears - adopt their customs (even if only temporarily in their presence); re-assure them that you are interested in their son as well as his culture. If they are vegetarians, you may want to become one at least temporarily in their presence. Your BF must have the guts to tell his parents how much he loves you. If he can't stand up for you in front of his parents, he probably isn't worth it. Parents will always come around to accept their children's decisions. Good luck, and hope you can swing it!
2006-08-03 15:42:00 · answer #1 · answered by noitall 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
1) IF your boyfriend is not going to stand up for your relationship to his parents, I believe that your relationship is not headed anywhere, believe me cause I'm Indian. The only thing you can do is to force you bf to let it out
2) Indian background... God, girll.... you're asking me something that even I discover something new on a daily basis...
3) Arranged marriage... Ah... Keeps the family and society happy perse, cause your children are marrying the right kind, from the right type of family or and most importantly Indian, from the same religion and caste (that's social standing)
4) Most parents are cool about it, eventhough from personal experience, they never actually approve of it outright but do it for the sake of the children's happiness... It really depends on the mindset of the family, how open they are to this? In your case, I don't want to give to much hope to you unless your bf is brave enough to face his parents and the endless family and relatives... Sorry, I just being honest here.. I'm cool with it though but believe even I'm pressured to date (at least) and marry an Indian girl...
2006-08-03 15:50:44 · answer #2 · answered by Eddie Raj 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't state your ages or location,
If you are both at least in your twenties, self sufficient, and living in the US, you can easily make it work.
If you 12, and living in India, then no chance.
If you are teens (sounds like you are), defying your parents create many, many, hassles that you should not have to deal with, and ultimately will sabotage your relationship.
If you truly and deeply love each other, and are willing to be together no matter what happens, the go for it.
My hunch is that unfortunately, no matter how much you like this guy, ultimately, his parents will win. Save yourself tons and tons of grief, and end it now.
You deserve a good, healthy, positive relationship. Don't settle for a relationship with too many problems.
2006-08-03 15:46:52 · answer #3 · answered by profdave99 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that it will work out. He is prolly going to respect his culture and go with an arranged marriage, so there is really no place for you in his future.
2006-08-03 15:39:39 · answer #4 · answered by ♥dream_angel♥ 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this is just their culture,baby. i know A LOT of indian people. I advise you just to forget about it. keep dating the guy if you want, but know that it will not last forever.
2006-08-03 15:40:07 · answer #5 · answered by realgirl768553 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You don't date the parents.
2006-08-03 15:38:52 · answer #6 · answered by Milan J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
FIRST...GET IT OUT IN THE OPEN. IT'S HIS LIFE. I AM IN A SITUATION AND IT HAS BEEN 2 YEARS NOW. IM STILL NOT ENVITED OVER BUT THEY SEE HE IS HAPPY AND DOING GREAT SO IM MAKING PROCESS. BAND TOGETHER AND BE HAPPY. DON'T LET OTHERS BELIEFS AND NEGITIVES GET IN BETWEEN YOU. GOOD LUCK
2006-08-03 15:40:07 · answer #7 · answered by openminded 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you talking Indians with dots or feathers?
2006-08-03 15:39:15 · answer #8 · answered by sethle99 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are dating the GUY not the FAMILY .
2006-08-03 15:44:46 · answer #9 · answered by Don Richard G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HI..... really hope to know which country u're from. wat era r we in now? arranged marriage? my god............... well, i wouldn't say dat there's no such thing in this era now but it's so "not common".
Regardless of whether his parents oni belive in arrange marriage or not, juz do wat u both think it's right! U both haf to go thru it together. It take 2 hands to clap, if u r willing to take on e fighting spirit to b wif ur bf den go all e way out! dat's me i can do all things for love to e extend of hackin care of my bf's parents so long i think it's right and i'm not doing anything wrong.
But at the same point of time, do u think u will last long wif ur bf? Do u think u guys can come to a point of time wen u both will be discussing abt marriage? if nope den just do wat u both enjoy doin now but if ur ans is yes den u really haf to fight for ur happiness!
Afterall it all lies in u & ur bf's hands, if u guys really love each other and really thinks dat there's happiness in the relationship den stop thinkin of how his parents will think. Time will prove to his parents wat a loving couple the both of u r!
Oh.....it doesn't help even if u know y indian parents like to haf arrange marriage and wat indian parents think of their kids going out with non-indian. It's not as though their son is going out with an ALIEN or wat. Moral of the story is make their parents understand wat u two haf gone thru and make them agree to the relationship. If really they insist of not approving the relationship to go on. hmMmmmM......for me i would simply hack care so long we haf our own happiness.but i wun know wat about u ...sometimes it's good to b rebelious in order to get wat u want......wahahahahaha......
FIGHT FOR UR OWN HAPPINESS!!!
Cheers
Wonderland83
2006-08-03 15:51:26 · answer #10 · answered by wonderland83 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋