Why can't I find a man who wants to date?

Question

I have met guys online that seemed interested in a second date. We kept in touch daily but it seems like they would never ask for another real date. One would ask me when I was off and then he would say we could do something that day and then he would wait till late and ask if I wanted to come over and watch tv with him and spend the night (that's not a good second date to me) and the other one that I am talking to now always seems to be busy doing trivial things on the few evenings I have off. I would think he could make some time to go out again. The dates we have had have been long events and he seemed interested and we talk everyday. I am tired of being penpals and tired of sitting home on my nights off trying to get some guy to get the point that I would like to be asked out. I am not going to ask him out and anyway he always makes himself busy anyway. Why can't I find a normal man to go out with on normal dates?

to the person who said they were going to report me, for your info I am not using this as a dating site, I am asking a question about dating. I thought that was what the dating and singles section was for. If I was looking for a date, I would have given my profile now wouldln't I have? Loosen up people and have fun and stop analyzing peoples questions.

Answer 1

Did you ever think of asking for another real date? What would you define as normal?

Perhaps you're too inflexible, or not very interesting? "Online" is by definition somewhat isolated, why don't you think of something quasi-social where you would come into contact with men in a platonic environment where there is not much structure. Church is sometimes good, or community theater (things that I have done), but if you find something that really stimulates, then perhaps you'll find someone who has some similar views, similar passions or similar interests.

Answer 2

GIRL, You have got to stop looking in the wrong places for your dates, or lets say no dates. You have answered the question yourself. Find your interests and make a list of them. Figure out the best place to meet guys who share your interest, and that would be the very place you need to go. If you sit home waiting on someone to call or make up their mind, then you are not trying to find a date, you are waiting for a date to find you. Hint: If you like books, find a guy at the library. If you like skating, then find a guy at the skating rink. You have got to put a little effort into it, or you may end up being old and lonely! Good Luck.

Answer 3

I had the same problem with on-line dating. Some people take that literally-- to date on-line. They think that if they chat with you long enough then it is okay to have you over for TV and sex.

I did two things. First, I made it a rule to only exchange about 5 e-mails and then if they did not want to meet, I would move on. Second, I joined clubs and activities that I was interested in in order to meet people that were out there being active in life. I think many on-line are just content being at home on their computer. If you want to be out doing things-- then go.

One last thing-- I don't know where you are from but there is a great club called Events and Adventures that is a way to get out and do some of the hundreds of activities they plan per month with people who have the same interests. I went hot air ballooning, to plays, dinners, dances, camping, kayaking, wine-tasting--many many activities. It is not a club to meet singles, per se. Just to get out and chances are you may meet someone. www.eventsandadventures.com

Answer 4

Honey i obviously think that you are being too available. Why? because ive been there, done that. and second, looking for guys on the computer is not a good idea because yea some of them might all right except the guy you described sounds like he just wanted a peice of ***, but secondly, you never know what kind of freak you will run into and it can be kind of dangerous. I think that you should not go looking for the guy, although we do it any way. but i think that you will meet someone in the town that you live in, in person. try to get somefriends to hook you up, or go out to the mall, lookin all good. but honestly the worst thing you can do is make your self to obvious or desperate. And if the guy is only interested in late night rondevues, you know he is only looking for one thing. And these days it is not just about dating a person, get to know the person before you decide to sleep with them because you never know what they can give or if they just want to use you. good luck, becareful and be smart.

Answer 5

maybe you want too much girl you should tell him what you want and if he cant give you what you need and want then you need not be with him ok girl( you need to be more dependent and not up tight dont talk on the computer go out to clubs and dance the nite away get a sexxy dress and nice shoes ........oh ya get a thong and make sure guys can see it but never let them follow you ... if your not interested then dont be scared to tell him but if he still wants to follow you ... girl you better warn him again and then always carry Mace ok .... Good Lu7ck!

Answer 6

I took my troubles down to Madame Ruth
You know that gypsy with the gold-capped tooth
She's got a pad down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
Sellin' little bottles of Love Potion Number Nine

I told her that I was a flop with chics
I've been this way since 1956
She looked at my palm and she made a magic sign
She said "What you need is Love Potion Number Nine"

She bent down and turned around and gave me a wink
She said "I'm gonna make it up right here in the sink"
It smelled like turpentine, it looked like Indian ink
I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took a drink

I didn't know if it was day or night
I started kissin' everything in sight
But when I kissed a cop down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
He broke my little bottle of Love Potion Number Nine

I held my nose, I closed my eyes, I took a drink

I didn't know if it was day or night
I started kissin' everything in sight
But when I kissed a cop down on Thirty-Fourth and Vine
He broke my little bottle of Love Potion Number Nine
Love Potion Number Nine
Love Potion Number Nine
Love Potion Number Nine

Answer 7

Why dont you go out. Stay active, join a club or something. You may find those guys to date.

Answer 8

I like to date.

Answer 9

It's because you won't ask them out. Also, it's because you go online to stay in contact with them.

Answer 10

May you are not looking for it... the LORD say seek and you shall find knock and shall be open into u.