I have this best friend, who is a straight male, whom Ive had a crush on since high school. Well, this past Sunday we went out to the bars and on our way home, he kissed me on the cheek. I'm so confused now. I dont know if it was the alcohol or if he secretly likes me in return. He has told me if he was gay, he would date me. Its all Ive been thinking about since that night. Please HELP!! NO homophobic or close-minded answers please!! Thanks!!
2006-08-03 12:37:43 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I think that you need to talk to your friend and let him know that you were confused by the kiss on the cheek. It sounds like he has been sending you mixed messages.... you will never know what is going on with him unless you find a way to talk to him....... maybe he is searching for a way to come out that is safe.
2006-08-03 12:51:33 · answer #1 · answered by teacherprincessgirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He probably loves and accepts you but don't assume that he is secrecty gay. Gay implies that only the same sex does it for you, however bi implies both do. I think all people are secretly bi-curious, but most are raised and socialized to be afraid or against that. Your friend is definitely bi-curious, but he may have reservations about exploring that. He might not, it could go either way. If he did choose to explore things with you, don't set your expectations too high. When experimenting with sexual encounters, a trusted friend is likely the one to go there with. As the trusted friend, know that if he goes there, he may just be experimenting and want nothing more with you in that way. If you love him as a friend, then you have to accept that and not texpect him to be anything other than what is in his true nature. Be there for him and accept where he wants to go, but don't push it any further. It takes great strength and courage to accept controversial things about yourself, let alone, let it be known to society. Relax and see what happens. If you can't, then talk to him about how you feel, and see where stands with you. He might not want to find out if he has any same sex tendencies. If that's the case, then accept it and continue to be his friend and his soft place to fall. That's all you can do.
Good luck and take care!
2006-08-03 19:58:21 · answer #2 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, by him saying if he was gay he might, gives me a suggestion that he has thought about it. You need to sit and have a talk with him while you are both sober and ask him his true feelings. Let him know how you feel about him , if he think he wants to test it out fine, if not respect him and try not to look at him that way. Don't lose a friend over this. He already knows your gay so what do you have to lose by just asking.
2006-08-03 19:53:01 · answer #3 · answered by reemdog 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
this is a complicated situation. im assuming that he knows you are gay and that he has told you he is straight. in your favour i dont know any straight men who say to their gay freinds that they would date them if they were gay and kiss them on the cheek. on the negative side he may have feelings for you but he is not ready to express them and therefore uses alcohol to make him feel more comfortable. this one is definately going to take time with no definite result that it will work out in your favour, unfortunately. this one sounds like until he makes his definite move you are just going to have to crush on him. if you tell him you risk your friendship unless you feel like he would be okay with that. but im not sure he would be if he is gay he is definately still in the closet with the door bolted shut. maybe give him sutle hints or kiss him on the cheek next time and see how he reacts. im sorry im not more helpful. you could try a gay chat/advice room and maybe someone with similar experinces could help you.
2006-08-03 19:46:49 · answer #4 · answered by burn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When people are drunk, they are often out of whack. The conversations they hold with you can be significant sounding, but once they sober up, their like "Oh ****! What the hell was I muttering about?!" Or if not he was probably playing around with you because he knows your gay and will get infactuated. Trust me, I know from experience because a lesbian chased me through the halls thinking I like her because I tried to hold a conversation with her. That was before I realized she was a lesbian, but it was too late, she already got the mixed signals and I was high tailing it with her hot on my heels. Not a pretty sight.
2006-08-03 19:49:13 · answer #5 · answered by warhead 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you see your here to get answers from strangers... and well the one you should really ask is him...maybe hes been acting straight...but he isint.. the only way you can find out if it was the alcool is to ask him... this is what i would say...you said if you were gay you would go out with me .. and the other nigth you kissed me... so are you giving me your approval? ok maybe not that staight foward but you get the point but what ever you do make sure theres no one around... because he migth freez up and say something he dosent want to say.. make sure you guys have lots of time to talk about it.. and make it clear to him you are serious and that your not joking.... well the best to you...
Lysy
2006-08-03 19:47:25 · answer #6 · answered by samantha 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should subtly hit on him and see what happens-of course in private-
Ask him about the kiss on the cheek....make sure he knows that you ll still be his friend if he declines
Good luck-but dont get your hopes up
2006-08-03 19:44:14 · answer #7 · answered by bulldog lover 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well just stop and think about it and ask him and maybe he will tell u and if it really was the alcohol then ask him cause normally if he can't remeber then it was of course the alchol but otherwise then u know 4 sure that he is truning gay
2006-08-03 19:42:39 · answer #8 · answered by Tracey 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
take the risk n tell him how u feel,i might like u bt doesnt know how to come out of the closet,take a chance it might be worth ur while
2006-08-03 20:24:47 · answer #9 · answered by khadeeja 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he knows you are gay, I think he was messing with you. I wouldn't read too much into it.
2006-08-03 19:42:08 · answer #10 · answered by brian k 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋