how do i stop my son smoking dope?

Answer 1

rehab??

Answer 2

Rehab seems to be a popular answer here but that is not the answer.
He has to admit to having a problem and want to give up.

Unfortunately drugs are a part of our everyday culture and its an inevitable fact that all our children will one day be exposed to it. Our role is to ensure that our kids are educated enough to be able to make their decision and face the consequences. I think you need to trust your sons judgement.

A couple of things I think you need to ask yourself are:
Has this made him a bad person? Is it stopping him from succeeding in life?
Do you actually trust your son to ultimately be responsible for his actions?


Your 2 initial options are to confront your son or not & I think from these there are then 2 possible reations to your decision.

Confrontation:
a) He stops smoking and the good guy gets his girl.
b) He rebels further against your wishes and the problem is inflamed

Non confrontation:
a) He continues to smoke while you are aware and he keeps within limits so as not to be caught. Eventually he grows out of smoking.
b) He continues smoking and ends up having to do rehab.


Its your sons life and no matter how hard you try you can't stop him he has to make that decision.

My mum chose not to confront me and 10 years on all my mates smoke still & I like to when I'm drunk. This said I've managed to get good GCSE's, A levels, a degree in maths and I now even teach maths. Some of you may be pretty worried about this. The sad reality is that in a middle class school with good results I was able to score on the playground at 12. I can only imagine that this is nothing compared to today. All you can do is be wise to whats going on and trust your son makes the right decisions.
I can't speak for everyone but the thing that probably kept me from going mad was that I was trying to hide it. Once your son knows you know if you haven't the ability to convince him to stop through choice he will know that he can basically get away with it because physically you can't stop him.

Its illegal and unhealthy but if he continues to get good grades, get girlfriends, work and basically function as any other person than what truly is the problem? He will stop when he wants to.

Answer 3

Question for you?
- does smoking dope affect your son's role in our society?
[not your relationship with him, but gauge how much he smokes and try and be as impartial as you can be]
- how old is your son?
[i think from 16 onwards it will be very difficult and maye be even more negative stress on your relationship]
- you could try being honest with him, and express your concerns (apologies if you have already tried this)

I think that if he at least 16-18, isn't doped up every school night (or equivalent), and he is happy with himself, then it may be worse in the end to try and stop him smoking dope.

I think your son will be OK. There are so many who do smoke, and scientifically, in relatively small doses, it isn't nasty at all. He definitely shouldn't drive a vehicle under the influence, as with alcohol, and it is really bad if he goes, say, to school in the mornings doped up, but a little cannabis only is as BAD as the amount of tabacco he smokes with it.

Don't worry yourself sick if the situation doesn't merit it, my mum has always had similar concerns and I'm OK? I still go to Amsterdam occasionally, I'm over 40, I have a child, and I am a fairly responsable member of society.

Your GP could advise you better than us, not only for your son, but to help you too.

Answer 4

I think what the majority of other people are saying is correct, rehab is a great tool, as long as it isn't rushed! Try not having you favourite thing (tea, coffee, chocolate, pizza, you teddy at night, sex, what ever) for one month and see how hard it is. Also notice how much more you want it afterwards. Give it up for 3-6 months and you'll bearly be bothered anymore. If you do go down this route though, you need to ensure that he knows you're there to support him and that you aren't going to be angry with him if he should relapse, but instead help him more if it happened.

Do talk to him, but open the conversation carefully and do NOT be judgemental, AND with the right tone of voice, just by saying something in too stern a tone of voice can easily put him off listening to the entire conversation. Yeah, I know, OK, Yeah, Yeah, Sorry, OK, I know (bad sign!) Remember, as I know you are by posting this, you're a caring parent that only wants to HELP your son, not to punish.

Your other more dangerous route is to buy him an ounce (depending on local laws, personal consumption?) (or a BIG bag, depending on supplier) and make him smoke/eat all of it in one session until he's sick, then just a little more. Again though, this is an extremely dangerous option, it can get him more addicted to larger quantities, put him off completely (remember the last time you drank 17 drinks too many and promised yourself you'd never drink again), or at worst kill him by over-dosing. :-(

Final thoughts: He may just be a casual smoker, like going to a bar/pub for a couple of drinks once every week or two, which may mean he isn't even addicted but just enjoys the feeling he gets from it, but is completely in control of himself.

Answer 5

OK here's what u do... first find out where and who's hes getting it from and what friends of his does it. (recon) then talk to him about it ask him what he wants when hes older nice cloths car etc.... then let him met a person who has all that and let him know that drugs didn't help him get it, then let him met a dope guy and show him all his money goes for the drugs and nothing else. let him know his choices and if he cant make the right ones then since u r the parent u can make them for him. good luck...

Answer 6

if he s of an age that he isnt earning his own money-limit the amount of money he has.
i know a lot of people would not agree with me,but i let my lad ,who is now 18yr, smoke dope in his room ,while he was playing his xbox or whatever ,with his pals.it didnt take long for the novelty to wear off .the fact i allowed them to smoke it-took the fun out of it...he doesnt touch the stuff anymore...all the time he was "red-eyed", he ate well,he wasnt agressive, i knew where he was,and who he was with and what they were doing. now he goes to the pub ,thurs,fri,sat, sometimes he is so drunk he cant remember getting home. he is aggresive, argumentive, and horrible when filled with booze. im a nervous wreck when i know he is out....he really scares me sometimes.
i would rather he smoked pot anyday,than reach for the bottle....

Answer 7

If your son is under age, get him in a drug rehab quick! My son almost lost his life due to drugs. Do anything you can to get him away form the drugs and do it now! Join a local ALANON group to teach you how to cope with his problems. Tough Love on your part is needed. Call your local Department of Humans Services and they can refer you to rehab facilities. Or ask you family doctor. He should know also.

Answer 8

show him a video showing what dope does to your body and that you could hav to hav open heart surgery later on in life(my grandpa had to just because he smoked cigarettes imagine what its like when you smoke dope)

Answer 9

Sue is 100% right. I have kids and I know from experience that impressing their friends is way more important than doing the right thing. Only when they mature and choose the right friends will they stay away from all that stupid stuff and realise how that and all the things they do with their idiot friends was all a waste of time.

Answer 10

OK dope is pretty serious so just tell him that if he don't stop ur have to take it further

Answer 11

I posted the same question. Im doing tough love it's killing me . I also make him come home every hour and a half he needs to sit with me so I can check his cloth, eyes. Good luck!!!! If you have anything else that works good let me know.