I found a rubber fake vagina toy up in the attic.?

Question

Since when did the make these and have you ever caught your B/F or spouse with one?
I know we gals have toys.......But this was a full blown replica butt with vibrating vagina. He denied it was his of course.
Should I be pissed or what for his denial in admitting it's his? Or just let it go.

Answer 1

Something that you need to understand about us (men) is that we generally have a much higher sex drive than women. It’s a whole lot more common for men to initiate sex than women. That’s one thing. Next, sexual pleasures come in different ways. What I mean by that is that orgasm can be achieved by different means, each comes with it’s own good “feelings!” In other words, each way feels different, with it‘s own kind of special pleasure. For example, the sensations and orgasms received from oral sex feels different than one received by vaginal or anal penetration or by masturbation. The same rules apply to the artificial vagina found in your artic. The sensations and orgasms received from “it” feels different to your BF. In his head (men’s head), it’s something different, another toy, another way of experiencing pleasure... just like masturbating or oral sex. It’s funny how many married women are shocked when they find out that their bfs/husbands masturbate on the side even though they have sex on a normal basis. Sometimes the idea that your doing something that is not right (dirty) in the eyes of a lot of people is sexually stimulating in itself. Because come on, lot’s of people think that only pervs and lonely men buy that type of toys.

I really don’t see the artificial vagina as an immediate threat to your relationship. But it is something that you both definitely need to talk about. But it needs to be done in a open minded, safe, non-accusing or judgmental environment. It has to be done so that he doesn’t feel like he’s being interrogated, which will make him get defensive or worst yet, go into his “gave.”

There are a few things that come to my mind when I think about his lack of communication with you. First, it’s obvious that like most couples, he doesn’t feel comfortable enough to communicate his sexual needs with you. Which makes me wonder why? Either you both have avoided talking about sex in an OPEN way, he has expressed some ideas to you and you rejected him, or you are up tied about your own sexual needs with him. Something that I’ve noticed by talking to a lot of couples, is that couples in which the females are very open about their own sexual fantasies and desires, are generally where you’ll find the men that are more willing to talk about their own fantasies as well. Don’t forget that in most cases a man will only be as sexual and as his partner will aloud him to be. Generally women determine what and how far things get. A woman that is up tied about sex, will make her bf think twice about approaching her with a fantasy he may have, since he may be scared being rejected and judged in a negative way.

If he’s looking outside the bedroom for “pleasure,” then it indicates that he may not be entirely happy with what’s going on in it. He may be lacking sex or may be he needs a little more spice in it. Maybe your sex drives don’t match and he‘s looking for a way of releasing his sexual tension in between encounters with you.

Like everything else, there are a lot of possibilities. From sexual addiction to sexual conditioning. Sexual conditioning in the sense that some men get so used to masturbating, that they find it more pleasurable than having real vaginal or anal sex with a woman. That’s something that only you can determine by noticing the way he acts inside and outside the bedroom.

Something of concern, is the fact that those artificial vaginas don’t feel anything like the real thing. Most are generally tighter and designed in a way that stimulates the penis in a way that a real vagina doesn’t. He may become conditioned to the sensations generated by the artifact, that he may start having problems enjoying the real thing. In a similar way that some women get conditioned to the stimulation generated by the fast pulses of vibrators. Sex toys are nice toys, but that’s all they are…nice TOYS! Used too often can cause problems. Used with moderation, it can improve both of your sex lives.

Good luck!

Answer 2

I'm going to point out a very revealing comment you made: "and dont alk about dildos. thats is different. men dont have a problem with that because men are different. its about womens honour" In psychology, this would be an example of compartmentalization. You know right off the bat that your argument is flawed, so you compensate by saying the dildo argument is "different". No, it is not different. The agrument about a women using a dildo is perfectly valid.

Answer 3

Just let it go. Not all women would admit to toys either.

Answer 4

Ys never know, MAYBE it wasnt his!! i dont think u should get pissed, its only natural, now if u found a real girl hiding, than id be pissed!!!

Answer 5

Let it go. So what if it's his, let him play with it just as he would let you play with toys. And i've heard of the vagina replica's but never seen one nor had my man play with one. If you really think it's his then try bringing into your sex life, i dunno. try something new, broaden your horizon.

Answer 6

MAYBE YOU SHOULD JUST GIVE UP TO HIM MORE and you won'tt have to worry about this problem. JUST LET IT GO!!!

Answer 7

let it go, he's just embarassed about being found out about it.

Answer 8

how about throw it away and see what he does

Answer 9

whos else would it be? come he thinks your stupid

Answer 10

wow, tough one...