i'm 18 i have a son name Jaquan should i like put my life on hold 4 him?

Answer 1

you had him so he is a part of your life

Answer 2

What do you mean by put your "life on hold?"

Your child is a very major part of "your" life now. Any decisions you make must take the child into consideration. But...

you're not doing your son any favors by just sitting around. If you have the opportunity stay in school, or go back to school, or attended a community or other college (if you've already graduated HS) you should find a way to DO it.

If you can work (as in you can find suitable day care for Jaquan), you should do it.

But if your definition of putting your "life on hold" is REALLY about hanging, dating and nightclubbing, forget it.

When you feel you've accomplished enough with your own life to provide your child with a loving and reasonably comfortable home life...

When you are self-sufficient enough to pay for trustworthy babysitters...

When you can honestly agree that bringing a new life into the world brings with it the need to be mature, responsible, stable and (most often) sober then, and ONLY then can you consider indulging yourself in the activities other people of your age often indulge in.

And where's this kid's father? If you chose to be intimate with some scumbag who left you holding the baby all alone, the BEST place for you, 'til further notice, as at home, anyway.

Good luck. Be proud of your baby and do NOT blame him for any difficulties you may have to deal with to do those things that will make you proud of yourself.

And never hesitate to reach-out to friends, family or, often even better, your local Social Services community for help.

God--or whomever--bless.

Answer 3

This is an interesting, perhaps bogus question? Well, here's how I see it. I'll assume you had an unplanned pregnancy and Jaquan is a baby. If you aren't ready to commit to being there for him and aren't enjoying being a parent, I would seek advice and perhaps counseling on the issue. At that point you would need to decide what was more important for you, your life or his. If you choose you, then look into open adoption and give a family who can't have a baby a chance to raise him and make him their #1, while still keeping up to date on his well-being. If you choose him, then know raising him will have it's ups and downs but plenty of rewards as well. When he is older and enters school you will have more freedom and it's never too late to go back to school, enter the workforce, have relationships, party or any of that. Hope it all works out for you both.

Answer 4

You don't have to put your life on hold, but you must step up to the plate and be his mom. You do not have the luxury of being just an 18 yr old anymore. He did not ask to be brought into this world, you now have the responsibility of taking care of him first - you come second. You can always take a little time off and have someone watch him if you want to go out once in a while -- every parent does (or should) this.

Answer 5

I have a son-in-law that is 33 and his oldest son is 18 and he did put his single life on hold for him and now he has a16 and 13 year old also. I have asked him that very question are you sorry son that u did it and he says he would not trade his life as a father for all the fun he would have had being single for nothing in this world. He is a great father and greatly loved in the community. He is so loved and respected by everyone in our town. And trust me he was a wild child wildddddd childdddddddd. But he has produced three of the finest children in our town and they are as loved and respected as their father, so yes if you can do it, take on the task of father hood charlie says he gets rewards daily. But if you can't then walk away and let the child have good parents. I am babysitting my daughters adopted child everyday while her and her husband work and we do not look down on her druggy mother because she gave up the child and gave it a chance in life good luck hon.

Answer 6

You are a mother and should do everything you can for your son. All mothers sacrifice to care for thier children no matter what age. Trust in God and things will work out. Don't let others make you feel like you are nothing because you don't go out and party, drink, drugs, dancing etc.... people with no children do that sometimes but being a success as a parent has its own rewards. Be a good mother, not everyone starts out doing it right but you can feel proud of yourself and form a lasting bond with a very important person, your son.

Answer 7

He IS your life now. I had a baby when I was 17. She is the most beautiful 4 year old now. I gave up going out and hanging with my friends and I can honestly say that she was a blessing. I think I would have ended up somewhere bad if I wouldnt have had her to help me straighten my life out. Let him show you a whole other side of happiness. Being a mother is fufilling, enjoy every second of it. Before you know it, he will be grown. You will still have a life, but it will all have a different meaning now. Good Luck!!

Answer 8

Hopefully, if you plan things well, you can have a life, be a great mom and be successful at it all. You may need time away from your son, but not totally forget him. You have to do things with him, and have some alone time too. i hope you have a support system to do that. If family, friends, and the father are willing to keep him for a few hours, or over the weekend, that would give you some time to yourself. Good luck.

Answer 9

So, you are 18. I got married at 18 and had my daughter at 20, and son at 22. It is a shame you obviously aren't as prepared to be a parent as I was, but you CAN do it. Your life isn't over, he is just a major part of it. You now have to think of everything you do and how it will effect him. Continue your education so you can get a good job that will support the two of you comfortably. Children aren't cheap. They need education, entertainment and most of all lots of love and understanding.

Answer 10

Raising children is a privelage. While you do not have to put your life on hold your children should always come first. If you are unable to make the sacrifices neccessary to do this there are thousands of couples that would do anything just for the opportunity to raise a child. In other words if you don't have the dedication to raise your son correctly put him up for adoption.

Answer 11

There is no reason to put your life on hold I have a friend that had a child at 12 her mom and family helped her out alot so she really did not need to put her life on hold. I hope you have the same support from your family. Good Luck.