The truth is im really depressed and hurt. He cheated on me and i dont want him back but im still so hurt by what he did to me. We are going back to college in a week and half and we hang out with the same people. I know this sounds stupid but i want to show him that i am better off without him and happy. I know im not over him at all and im trying to move on. But it still hurts. Please i need your advice. I plan on trying to meet new people this year and make new friends but its hard.
2006-08-03 09:04:47 · 20 answers · asked by jenks1545 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
You won't be better until you get over the incredibly stupid notion that you need to show him anything. Grow up, you're in college for God's sake.
The opposite of love is not hate, it's APATHY. The biggest disservice you can do to him is by not caring whether he lives or dies, whether he is dating the hottest chick on campus or the ugliest pig. You simply don't care.
Once you become completely apathetic to his entire existence, he won't have any power over you, and these immature feelings of wanting to "prove" things to him will go away.
2006-08-03 09:11:48 · answer #1 · answered by Ken Jackson 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's called one day at a time. You said you hang out with the same people. Make sure those people don't know how depressed you are. You don't want him to know you haven't moved on. Yes, do meet other people, but don't jump into another relationship because you are lonely or depressed.
On the brighter side, if you can see one right now, it could have gone a bigger step into your relationship, and been marriage, and children. If he has cheated on you, he will cheat again!!!
2006-08-03 16:18:22 · answer #2 · answered by lariat_sonata 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good for you! I'm glad to hear that you're not thinking about taking him back after he cheated. It rarely works out for the best in these situations.
No matter how much you cared for this guy, there had to be a list of things you didn't like about him. My best "get over him" tactic has always been to make a list of all of these things and run it in my mind over and over (especially when I would start to miss him). You find that by doing this you'll miss him less and less and in time by over him altogether.
You should also continue to remind yourself that he doesn't deserve you. No man that is worthy of you would cheat....
Next step: pamper yourself! Maybe by having your girlfriends over for a spa party or going to get a "back to school" manicure, pedicure or a new hairstyle.
I view being single as an opportunity to do whatever I want! You're no longer accountable to anyone but yourself. Enjoy it!
I also view this as an opportunity to "upgrade" if you will. This means allowing yourself to find someone even better. (hotter, smarter, more sensitive, funnier or someone that just treats you like the princess that you are!)
Best of luck! I hope this helps.
2006-08-03 16:26:42 · answer #3 · answered by Sara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no need to show him that you are better off. Go your own way. It will hurt - today and tomorrow and it will be difficult, it is no lie. However, this is some of the hard ways of life.
Don't let yourself down and drown. There is so much still ahead of you. Learn by this and make the best when you meet the next perfect him!
Good luck and take care!
2006-08-03 16:11:10 · answer #4 · answered by mickiepotter 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just need to state that "joe_smo_red" shorter is better in the answer especially this answer.
The best advice i can give you is DON'T let him back in. Be friends and be civil but learn your lesson and never give him the power to hurt you again. Also don't go looking for a new model BF to show off. just be relaxed and show him that you have your own life, and you will survive without him as you significant other. and take all the time you need before entering the dating pool again
2006-08-03 16:13:25 · answer #5 · answered by Beeper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Actually work on being happy and better off. I have been there a few times myself. Move on! Nothing gets to someone more when they think you have no interest in them. Good Luck and enjoy college life I'm sure there are some pretty cute guys there.
2006-08-03 16:11:38 · answer #6 · answered by sxybggr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't wait until you are back in school to meet with new people. Go out and enjoy life, get a head start. This way when you get back to school you will be on a roll and for sure he will notice the difference, even if your not trying. Be confident and sure of yourself and things will fall into place for you.
Good Luck.
2006-08-03 16:10:21 · answer #7 · answered by zoe112799 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By showing him that you've gotten on with your life without him.
Now for the explination. Women like to "show" that they're over their men. The problem with that theory is the fact that the reality that women have to do this shows they are not over us. Women tend to think we like this reality. In reality, only the jerks do. The fact is to most of us it's jus annoying.
Sorry; but, this is the truth from a man's point of view.
2006-08-03 16:10:46 · answer #8 · answered by Crossroads Keeper 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The more you try something that you don't feel It will show. Be yourself the fact that your know longer with him will soon make you feel good. It takes time. Do you really think he cares how your doing. LET IT GO every time you start to think about him or see him LET IT GO. when you see him in college smile and go on your way. LET IT GO
2006-08-03 16:14:46 · answer #9 · answered by winterbaby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep yourself well groomed, your clothes neat and tidy and always a smile on your face in public. If you need to be sad and grungy stay in your dorm room. Absolutely try to meet new people and make new friends, but don't jump into a new relationship too quickly.
2006-08-03 16:10:01 · answer #10 · answered by funda62 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋