We have no money!!?

Question

My husband and I don't make very much money. He works and I stay home with our 8 month old son. By the time we pay our bills, we have about $350-$400 left over. Buy food,diapers, and gas and we have about $150 left over. My husband seems to always use all this and more. At this moment he has overdrafted more than $300. I don't know what to do. He only gets $500 a pay check, so on his next paycheck we'll only have about $200. I love him, but talking to him doesn't help. I've threatened to take his debit-card away, but even that doesn't help. And everytime he overdrafts, the charge from the bank goes up $2. It started at $31 for everytime he overdrafts, and now it's $39. I don't know what to do! We have nothing to sell, and I don't have a car, so even if I wanted to go back to work, I couldn't. Has anybody else gone through this? I need ideas on how to save money. We end up in the negative every month and are 1/2 month behind on rent at this time. I'm so stressed out.

My husband is NOT cheating. And I can't get a part-time job because he doesn't work the same times everyday. He can go into work anywhere from 7am to 1pm. He doesn't have set working hours. He buys lunch when I don't have time to make it, instead of him making it. I'm getting financial aid to go to school, I'm doing all my classes over the internet, but I won't get my degree for 4 years.

Answer 1

You have to talk to him honestly and very seriously. If he respects you and your child, he will do this. Maybe you could sit down and actually write everything out on paper and show him the trouble your in. Actually show him the numbers, penalties and all, and make him understand. Throw some guilt on him too. Tell him that eventually it going to effect baby food and clothing. Maybe if he thinks he is hurting the child by being so loose with cash, he'll slow it down. Also, look at your finances very closely. Cut out everything you really don't need. If you have a home phone and a cell phone, one of those can go. If you have a dish or cable, do you really need the movies or super channel package. Cut it back. try and cut it from everywhere. Talk to the bank as a last gasp. Maybe they will cut him off or have a suggestion to keep him from using the debit card all the time. My last suggestion for saving money is this. Open a savings account in a bank across town. More than 20 miles or so. Do not get withdrawal slips, just deposit slips. Every paycheck, write a deposit slip out for $50, $40, even $10 bucks, anything will do, just save. Put it in the mail and forget it. You'll be amazed at the money you save over time without much thought. Also, tell him to quit eating lunch out so much. That saves alot of money. I own my own business and make well over $100K a year and I eat lunch in the office almost everyday. It can be done.

Answer 2

Well, first off..it sounds like you are very young. You husband is still living the young and carefree life. He now has major responsibilities to take care of.

I suggest sitting down with him and laying it all out. Let him take over paying the bills and worrying about food and diapers. Seriously.

Do you know where the money is going? Start keeping track of every cent. Maybe you just arent making enough to make ends meet. If thats the case, then something needs to be done about it. Either he gets a better job or another job.

Good luck and I hope things work out.

Answer 3

Take the freakin' debit card away. In fact, call the bank and have it CANCELLED.

And if you are in the US, call Catholic Charities--they have FREE credit counselling classes here, so I'm sure they're all over the USA.

And if you choose a credit counsellor from the yellow pages, make sure they do not CHARGE YOU...

And could you get a job when he gets home from work? Even a few hours a week parttime will help. I know someone who works at a clothing store at night, not only extra $$ but the employee discount helps when she buys kids' clothes.

Good luck and take care.

PS--snoop thru his "personal stuff", see where that 150$ is going, if ya catch my drift.

Answer 4

It all sounds familiar..everyone has money problems, and there needs to be a way to solve this one. My husband used to take money out of our account too, as if it was some endless stream of money..I think he really believed it grew on trees...I dealt with it by threatening to get a separate account. I know it is hard when you are not working and contributing your finances...but he needs to realize that all he is doing is wasting money...try having a budget of some sort and take control of the bill paying to let him know this is what we have left, so you can have this much...if he doesn't agree, then I am not sure what to tell you. Sometimes it takes serious consequences for guys to see what it is that they are doing wrong. For myself and my husband, it took getting evicted from one of our apartments for him to stop spending like we were millionares...we are okay now, but still live paycheck to paycheck...and that part sucks...but now that I have control of paying the bills...I make sure I stay on top of it and let him know that we have nothing left, so he cannot spend...I too took his debit card away for a while...otherwise he may have never learned...Good luck.

Answer 5

Yikes! Tell him how stressed you are and tell him to stop or else. No one should have to live like this. I never have but some of my friends have and it is horrible. Tell him he has to start living by a budget. It is the only way. Also, as for you, you could possibly find some children to baby sit for some extra money, OR since you are low income you more than likely could qualify for student grants. Take some on line courses, get a degree that will lead to you being able to getting a decent paying job.

Answer 6

I had this situation before in Texas. So you need to go Government office get a WIC Program. You get for your baby, milk, cereals, juice, eggs all free until I guess when she/he turn 5. You need to get information's soon is possible. Also, this was like that in TX in the same office you can get food stamps. For that you need to show all the papers like how much you are paying for the rent/utilities all that and the paper how much your husband making. I remember we had a so bad time in TX they pay us over $350 food stamps monthly. This helped us very much. Good luck.... Just go right a way to the phone and get the information's and find out where you need to go.....

Answer 7

Why not babysit for other kids in your home so you can generate some income yourself? As for your hubby, could you try credit/financial counciling? You may want to take his debit card away, not just threaten to. Could you open a new account and transfer the funds after his paycheck has been deposited?
Good luck!

Answer 8

I understand where u are coming from. My boyfriend had gotten into a motorcycle accident in may. So he has been out of work for 3 months. We are out of funds for our bills everything is getting shut off notices and I have a dead end job. I go to school currently and can't make enough to help out with the bills I feel bad. So I feel where you are coming from.

Answer 9

99 cent stores, thrift shops and day-old bakeries. I'm sorry that your husband is bad with money. He needs to look for a higher paying job, or a second job, if he wants to continue to spend like this.

You will probably have to go back to work sooner than you would want to. His type usually don't change and once you do start bringing in money, he'll spend more of his. I hope you love him anyway for the kid's sake.

Answer 10

close the checking account and pay with money orders. i wish i had that much left over after my bills. u have to take charge of the money and give him so much a pay week . u have a baby and he needs to care of bills first. does he have a drug or gambling problem where does the money go
good luck