each one of my friends have at least one gf and i feel all those pretty things have been deliberatley ingoring me...i ve become a wretch and developed a low self esteem... i look good and earn i know i can love a woman and make her happy...i wud love doing things 4 my girl but where is she??? i can't understand and i feel so deprived and useless... i had never had an idea that a woman cud become so important 4 me... i work like maniac...my life has gotten entangled in works and more work and i have lost living for myself and since there is no one i feel so demotivated.. they say there is always someone 4 u...but where is she??? i wonder i cry in my sleep and each morning rebuke me with a slap that i'm destined to be a loner... God can any one help me out... i can't live like this...i can't...
2006-08-03 05:58:58 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
First of all, don't be desperate, don't act desperate. When girls get a feeling from you that all you want is a girlfriend they get scared and run away, guys do the same. I spent a long time alone once and even though I know it's hard you must be patient. Don't spend all of your time working, change the things you normally do. Take a class: painting, learning a language, practice a new sport, do something different. Go to different places, alone. Don't be shy and introduce yourself, meet new people! Don't focus on finding a girlfriend because you will only find love when you are not looking for it anymore.
2006-08-03 06:08:38 · answer #1 · answered by Vi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, why do you feel you need to have a girlfriend to complete your life? It's one thing to be open for a relationship but you sound as if you are downright desperate and that's probably scaring women away from you because you are trying too hard. One thing that you can do - and I know this works is to concentrate on liking yourself. People are attracted to happy, confident people, and they tend to avoid quivering wretches. Where do you go to meet people? I suspect that you are fully capable of meeting girls, but that you are coming on too strong - which is a major turnoff. I've met men who were so desperate that they had our whole relationship mapped out before we'd even gone out - and I back away slowly from these guys. You say you'd like to treat a girl right, but what does that really mean? You need to get to know someone before you move in on them, and let them be part of that decision making process. You might want to think about taking a class at the local community college or adult education - preferably something like a class on guitar basics - because women are drawn to guys who play guitar and it will give you a great hobby as well as a way to express yourself. And finally go see a doctor or mental health expert about your depression, there's no reason to kill yourself because you don't have a girlfriend and once you are feeling better, I just know you'll hook up with the right person. Take care of yourself and good luck!
2006-08-03 13:28:33 · answer #2 · answered by Mother Bear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you a teenager (you sound like one, that's why I ask)? I am. My friend got pretty low like that once (not suicidal though, but it was pretty bad). Ask God for help (even if you already do). Help others somehow. My "friends" that I've known for almost 7 years are neglecting me, too. I don't have a b/f, & the guy in my class who's been flirting w/ me ever since he came to my school, I just found out, has a new g/f (barely a month after school ended!), so I'm pretty down, too, but not too bad. How bout you email me (directly @ my address: beckaroo_messer)? That way you know you have a friend (& I know that I have one!!! lol) Ok? Cheer up; Smile!! :)
2006-08-03 13:05:43 · answer #3 · answered by beckaroo_messer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First and far most how can you love a woman? You have to love yourself first. The reason I say that is because you think of so much harm you want to do to yourself and its a sign of not loving yourself. There is a woman for you and if you believe in god he will send you someone that you can love and that you can trust and move on in life with. But just dont end your life over not having a woman. Because believe me some women are not meant to have. But just have faith and you will have that good woman and not just something you just picked up off of the street.
2006-08-03 13:10:12 · answer #4 · answered by Nita C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop beating yourself up!!! There is a woman out there for, but you won't find her if all you do is work, work, work. Get out and hang out more. Go on a double date with one of your guy friends and his girlfriend and ask her to bring alone a friend that may be single or try online dating service. A speed dating service might help. You'll get to meet 20-25 different women and if you like them or vice-versa you can exchange numbers and go from there. God does want you to be happy but I doubt if a woman is just gonna knock on your door and kiss you passionately. You've got to go find her!
Hope this helps.
2006-08-03 13:09:49 · answer #5 · answered by elr212006 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay just becuase all your peers haave a g/f doesnt mean you have to have one. Get your self back together right now because you fell apart now girl wants to take care of a lost puppy. Get yourself back together and get back in the game it will take time or maybe you will find a g/f right away but dont beat yourself up about that I know someone who has been single for a LONG time but he is still trying just play the game but dont be a player.
2006-08-03 13:09:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look man u have no idea how lucky you are. get in to your religion more offten while u had a chance. Life is not about love or sex life. Just rember pleasures came with desires and desires came with pain lose all and free your soul and be a being of enlightment.
2006-08-03 13:06:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This isn't something anywhere near killing yourself over.
The harder you look the harder it will be to find someone. Try to take it easy, someone will come to you eventually.
A lot of girls would be scared off by you because you feel you need a woman to live. concentrate on your work and the rest will come
2006-08-03 13:07:44 · answer #8 · answered by attila 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok, look i think the next time you see a girl that you would really like to go out with, walk up to her introduce yourself and start a conversation with her and at the end you say well it was nice talking to you and i would realy like to do it again sometime then you ask for email or phone number and then its up to yu what you make of it.
2006-08-03 13:07:02 · answer #9 · answered by theguru_10 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen up. I am 18 and I have never had a boyfriend. Why should you care what other people think. It's not about being just like everyone else. It's about being yourself.
2006-08-03 13:06:08 · answer #10 · answered by outdoorsgirl_18 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋