How do you cope when your man works away for months at a time?

Question

My man will be away for 3 months solid for the first time in our relationship. Any tips from others in a simlar situation on how to not get all depressed and miserable?

Answer 1

Keep yourself busy with family and friends.
Find a hobby that you really enjoy, something that will get you out of the house in the evenings for a little while.

That is the best advice I can give you. Find something that will not allow you to sit at home every evening and get depressed, something that will occupy your mind so you are not sitting at home thinking about your husband.
Go to the hospital and do volunteer work in the evenings a few times a week. If you love babies volunteer in the nursery. Or in the pediatric ward that has terminal children. They love to be read to, for someone to play games with them etc.
If you enjoy talking with the elderly and love hearing their stories, then volunteer at an old age home. The elderly love having someone to talk to, someone to write letters for them, to read to them.

Also keep a journal, write in it when you start feeling depressed, write your thoughts, your feelings etc
Write when your feeling angry at your husband for not being there with you when you really need him. It isn't his fault and you really know that but your still going to have times when you really wish he was for some reason or another. Use the journal to vent your feelings.
Write in it like you would if you were talking to him.
You can write whatever you want because nobody but you will ever read it. (unless YOU decide to share it with your husband or someone else)

Answer 2

I think that i need a little more information from you but...I don't know if he lives with you. Your situation is similar to mine. You have to understand that he is provider for the household, he is making a living the best way he knows how...At first it is depressing and you have that right to be upset/hurt. After that you can be doing things to keep yourself busy so when he comes back you are even more of an asset to him. Like go back to school to get more education, attend do it yourself seminars at home Depot/Lowe's and start on a project like refurnishing a room in your house/apartment...Just get out and do something productive.

Answer 3

Try to keep busy with other things in your life such as friends, family, church, etc. Look forward til the day he comes home and cherish it when it gets here. Remember: Absence makes the heart grow fonder. This could actually be great for your relationship. Atleast you wont be tired of each other and make the best of the time you have together!

Answer 4

Build up your own support network, friends, clubs, exercise. Enjoy the time he is away but always looking forward to when he comes back. If you keep busy you will have so much to tell him.
Do a job that you really enjoy. Do some voluntary work. Get a dog.

Answer 5

My husband use to go away to work for 6 to 8 mths at a time..if ur loyal to him and he is to u.. just make the best of the time you have when he's home.. Call each other alot. and if possible split up the 3 mths by going to where he is for a few days

Answer 6

ask any military spouse. we do it all the time. it's not easy at all, especially if you have kids but you have to be strong. that's really all there is to it. remember your commitment to the person you love, keep in touch the best you can, get involved in hobbies and activities, just live day by day at a time. when things get rough for me, i just look forward to getting through that day or i say something like wednesday is trash day. surely i can make it to trash day when today is only monday and when i do make it, i think of something else trivial a couple days away like oh it's wednesday, surely i can make it to friday!! it's the weekend! these are just little pep talks that i give myself. everyone has their own way of coping but this is one of my silly ones. i have kids so they keep me pretty busy but that doesn't make the situation any easier either! i try to plan something at least every other day to do, even if it's just errands b/c it helps break up the monotony of the day, the week..... i also make it a point NOT to wait around for my husband to call b/c when he doesn't call (which happens pretty often b/c of his work) i get really sad and disapointed. just remember time stops for no one and after 45 days for you, it's all down hill!! piece of cake, you can do it!

Answer 7

Hi. I went through the same thing when I my ex was living away - he was away for 18 months but we kept emailing sending texts and pics and silly little things in the mail.

Always talking on the phone always saving up to go visit each other - it really isnt as bad as you think. Just got to trust each other too and be able to talk to each other.

Answer 8

Quick,make plans now!!Join a club,find hobbies you like.Whatever you do keep busy!!My husband went away every week to work out of town.I let myself get bored then lonely.Bad mixture,next thing i know i needed love and found it in another man:( Lost my husband and my fairytale life!!!So whatever you do stay busy and dont stray!!!!Good luck God bless:O)

Answer 9

Talk to him on the phone or on the Internet as much as you can... if you want my little secret... get Ventrilo, is better than Skype since it's much more light and has real phone audio, you can use it with another programme to get the cam... it's great!

Answer 10

well there is the telephone,computer cafe,Internet,letter writing,every day send him something a little note of something that reminded you of him,or a saucy little note to tell him whats gonna happen when he gets home,this will keep you so busy that the time will fly by and he will be home before you know it.