do you like redneck jokes?

Question

you might be a redneck if your dad's cell # has nothing to do with a telephone!

you might be a redneck if you keep a pellet gun by the door.

you might be a redneck if you ever opened a beer at a funeral home

you might be a redneck if you think nsync is where ur dirty dishes are.

does anybody have a redneck joke?

Answer 1

You might be a redneck if your wife's hair gets caught in a celling fan.
You might be a redneck if you go to family reniunions to meet women.
You might be a redneck if you have more tires in your front lawn than on your mobile home.

Answer 2

You might be a redneck if you go to a family reunion looking for a date.

You might be a redneck if the most common phrase in your household is "Somebody jiggle the handle!"

You might be a redneck if your mother can tell a state trooper to kiss her *** without taking the ciggarette out of her mouth.

You might be a redneck if your tires cost more than your truck.

Answer 3

Redneck Fisherman's Love Poem

Collards is green,
my dog's name is Blue
and I'm so lucky
to have a sweet thang like you.

Yore hair is like cornsilk
a-flapping in the breeze.
Softer than Blue's
and without all them fleas.

You move like the bass,
which excite me in May.
You ain't got no scales
but I luv you anyway.

Yo're as satisfy'n as okry
jist a-fry'n in the pan.
Yo're as fragrant as "snuff"
right out of the can.

You have some'a yore teeth,
for which I am proud;
I hold my head high
when we're in a crowd.

On special occasions,
when you shave under yore arms,
well, I'm in hawg heaven,
and awed by yore charms.

Still them fellers at work,
they all want to know,
what I did to deserve
such a purdy, young doe.

Like a good roll of duct tape
yo're there fer yore man,
to patch up life's troubles
and fix what you can.

Yo're as cute as a junebug
a-buzzin' overhead.
You ain't mean like those far ants
I found in my bed.

Cut from the best cloth
like a plaid flannel shirt,
you spark up my life
more than a fresh load of dirt.

When you hold me real tight
like a padded gunrack,
my life is complete;
Ain't nuttin' I lack.

Yore complexion, it's perfection,
like the best vinyl sidin'.
despite all the years,
yore age, it keeps hidin'.

Me 'n' you's like a Moon Pie
with a RC cold drank,
we go together
like a skunk goes with stank.

Some men, they buy chocolate
for Valentine's Day;
They git it at Wal-Mart,
it's romantic that way.

Some men git roses
on that special day
from the cooler at Kroger.
"That's impressive," I say.

Some men buy fine diamonds
from a flea market booth.
"Diamonds are forever,"
they explain, suave and couth.

But for this man, honey,
these won't do.
Cause yor'e too special,
you sweet thang you.
I got you a gift,
without taste nor odor,
more useful than diamonds......
IT'S A NEW TROLL'N MOTOR!!

Answer 4

u might be a redneck if...
both u and ur dog use the tree on the cornor.
u mow ur lawn a ever found a car!
ur kid has more teeth than u
if u walk ur kid to school cuz hes in the same grade!
i gots lots more but i hate to type em out!

Answer 5

It's actually pretty easy to make up "redneck" jokes.
Example;If your dog starts wagging it's tail when you say the word "hunting",you might be a redneck.
I know it's not the best one but you get the idea.

Answer 6

sorry baby i can not think of any redneck jokes right now but i do have blue collar comedy tour at my house.

Answer 7

you might be a redneck if your lawn furniture is being used as your living room furniture.

Answer 8

they can be funny