Should I move?

Question

I have a really great job and they may be giving me an awsome promotion next year...I don't want to just leave my fiance and take our daughter away but this is an awsome offer. I need to start looking for a place to live... What should I do?

Answer 1

If you were single I'd say go for it! I moved away when I was young and single and it was a great experience.

But you have a daughter and a fiance to consider. It's a decision that you and your fiance have to make together. Is he willing to go with you? If he isn't what will happen to your relationship?

A great job is a wonderful thing - but it doesn't take the place of family. I had to make a decision between having a fantastic career and moving closer to my family and friends about six years ago. I chose to move closer to family becauase I couldn't take the loneliness anymore.

It was the best decision I ever made. Not only am I no longer lonely, but I've been able to launch an even better career than I had before.

Follow your heart and do what you think is best - but it is easier to find a new job than it is to find a family.

Good luck.

Answer 2

This is money and love issue. Is this child his?? Do you love your fiancee?? Does he treat you with respect, care, love and all of that stuff?? Is he a good father??? If answer is yes to these questions, then you should think....what kind of job does he have?? Is it one that offers him a lot (good salary, benefits, how long employed etc.)? If yes, forget about your promotion that you MIGHT get. Be happy to have a job and be with your little family. I think you chose family when you decided to have a baby. Maybe you should dedicate your time, your love, your work to it to have IT.

Because if you move, your fiancee might not be able or willing to do the same and you'll end up breaking a family. Don't forget the important role you're playing in a child's life. A home is formed by a mother to make it warm, loving, a place a husband and child would want to come to. It's nature, there's no equalization law that's going to change that. Be happy with your little salary because money is not everythng a family needs.

If your fiancee's job is one that he can transfer easily to to another state or place (I believe you want to move far away)? Or one that he can leave and find the same kind or better one somewhere else? Then you guys can decide if you both are comfortable with moving. But it's not all about you. It's both of you who needs to talk and communicate. I think then it would be better if he can move together with you. But still remember, a promotion means that you will have to work harder. Always think about your child or your family. Don't let them suffer. They need love and attention too.

If you don't like your fiancee for whatever reason, then I say you should leave right now. You shouldn't wait until you MIGHT get a promotion. You are then using him or he's using you? That's wrong. Or maybe you're finacially unstable or you are not sure if you love him or not. That case, stay until you're sure that you get promoted and then leave, or maybe you guys can try to repair your love for each other again. If it's not possible, then go.

Answer 3

You are asking for someone else to tell you if love is more importatnt than a promotion. Can the Fiance move with you? If so the answer is super easy move and take him with you. If his job is something he can not transfer or can not afford to lose maybe you have to allow him to decide if he wants to come or not. But be sure that abandoning love for money and position is really worth it

Do some soul dearching before you move away from him

Answer 4

Congrats on the the promotion you MAY get next year.

But... what about the realationship you HAVE now? You could be throwing everything away on something that may not happen.

Discuss this opportunity with your Fiance and tell him how much this means to you. See how he feels about things. This could be a great opportunity for your entire family, not just you and your Daughter.

Answer 5

Your professional life is important and you should do it...take the promotion otherwise, you will regret it. Why do you have to leave your fiance...can't he go with you? If he can't go with you, still take the job...you've got to do whats good for you...There has to be a YOU...and this is your opportunity. If your fiance can move, let him go with you...otherwise, you can still make the relationship work...just get together a little less often. By all means though, take the promotion!!

Answer 6

Yes. Take away the one chance your daughter has at a normal life for the sake of your own superficial ambitions.

Nice mom.

Answer 7

Honey, go for it!!! if it were him that got a great promotion then you'd make it work right? Expect the same of him and if he refuses, then he's not the man u thought him to be.

Answer 8

Take the offer. If he loves you he will want you to follow your dreams and be happy. Take advantage of the offer, most opportunity's only come by once.

Answer 9

Have you talked to your finance about what he wants? Is there any chance that he would move with you? If not, it sounds like you need to evaluate which is more important to you -- your career or your relationship. Only you can answer that one. Good luck!

Answer 10

WAIT UN TILL YOU KNOW FOR SURE THAT YOU GOT THE PROMOTION THEN TALK TO YOU FIANCE HE MIGHT MAKE THE MOVE WITH YOU. IF YOUR CHILD IS A BABY THAT WILL BE EASY BUT IF YOU HAVE A CHILD THAT OLDER YOU MIGHT HAVE TO SIT DOWN AND EXPLAIN IT TO HIM/HER.
MAKE THE TRANSITION EASY ER
IF I WAS YOU I WOULD MAKE THE MOVE ONLY IF IT WONT EFFECT ANY ONE.