We have been together for 5 months now and he was not very sexual or romantic in the beginning, but more so than now. He moved in with me and it is like pulling teeth to do anything sexually. We may have sex once a week. What can I do or should I be concerned when he says he just isn't very sexual?
2006-08-02 19:05:26 · 3 answers · asked by Concerned Partner 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Labidos vary a great deal amoung men and women no matter what their sexual orientation happens to be. It is time for a heart to heart talk. You actually have several options. One, of course is to live with the present situation
Many couples that find themselves in this situation but otherwise feel the relationship is worth maintaining, opt for an "Open" relationship. Although there are many interpretations, commonly, the active partner is permitted to find sexual partners outside of the relationship. Personally, I believe it is important that this partner returns home and they share the night together.
Can't you just lay there and let me... Your partner may be willing to indulge you by acting more like a prop or blow-up doll than a lover.
Dig deeper into your lovers head. See what it takes to raise the level of arousal. Often times, normal sex is just a bore to those that have ventured to the frontiers such as bondage, S&M, water sports, etc... and they are too timid to speak freely of such fetishes.
Performance concerns. Inability to achieve and maintain an erection shuts down many men. A doctor can help in many cases.
Foreplay isn't just playing with each others genitals and kissing. It may be that your lover needs an emotional boost to become aroused. A mood swing of some sort. Sometimes being playful works. Other times anger sets off a sexual charge. Even jealousy works in some cases.
Barring a physical complication. Sex is in the head. You need to trigger the sexual response in the mind. You can work fantasies into your plan. Maybe a drink to lower the inhibitions. A video to make a spark.
I could go on but you should see my point by now. Your lover may not want to have sex, but it is you that has the problem.
2006-08-02 19:51:07 · answer #1 · answered by terterryterter 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's pretty common for people to lose interest sexually when the relationship becomes more domesticated. This sort of problem has been plaguing hetero couples (particulalry married ones) forever. Maybe it's time to really sit down and talk, I know that's not exactly sexy, but it's either that or accept the fact that the "new-ness" is gone. Maybe new techniques need to be tried, fantasy exploration, etc.
2006-08-11 00:59:45 · answer #2 · answered by All I Hear Is Blah Blah Blah... 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well depend on his age and physical built, if none of those play in to the situation then he probably cheating on you.
2006-08-03 02:13:59 · answer #3 · answered by Leonardo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋