I have not actually had sex because I haven't been in love yet and I want to save my first time for someone that I truly care about. I have had offers from guys, but that seems to be the only thing that they want from me. This is very important to me- probably one of the most important things in my whole life, next to my family.The reactions I get from people vary-some think it's really awesome and others think I should just go out and have sex already! (In fact, a chic I work w/ that's supposed to be my friend made that comment the other day, and I haven't spoken to her since.) I really need another person's perspective on this-please help!!!!
2006-08-02 15:59:35 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
nothing wrong with you, i'm waiting till marriage. God bless you
2006-08-02 16:02:28 · answer #1 · answered by 3 nails 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sex is both a physical and mental activity.
To perform sex - without the mental or personal commitment will work just fine..... you can perfom the physical act yourself or with another person...all your parts will work. So what?
If you think having the physical act will make you a different person - you are really overstating the effect. No one runs around with a virgin sticker on their forehead. Many people who have had sex are terrible at it....this is not on their forehead either. Are they ahead of you? Is it a contest?
You need not think you missed something. Think of it this way...don't go to college and print up a fake college diploma. Go get a job with this diploma. Same things as sex for you.... you have the "degree" taken care of - but it is not a real diploma, but it can be if people think it is important and you have to have it to be a real adult. But is it really genuine? Will you feel better about yourself if you have a fake diploma?
Better to do the work, get a relationship that is real, lasting and the gift of each other is genuine. At least then the activity will be from you "doing the homework" and your grades will be reflected in the quality of the work....as every relationship is work.
Best luck to you. PS: Keep the virgin stuff off your forehead. It will make a mark.
2006-08-02 16:15:10 · answer #2 · answered by Kerry Z 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should get some experience before you get married. While the whole "virgin" thing is nice (cool, she waited for me! Yippee!) it doesn't go far. Speak to anyone who's had sex with a virgin. It's generally somewhat uncomfortable for the virgin, and the guy doesn't get much out of it as he's trying his darndest not to hurt her, while still holding an erection. Speaking from past (male) history, I will take the girl that is comfortable in her own sensuality anyday! A girl that is secure in her sexuality is somebody who's not going to be afraid to try something new, and will definitely be creative enough to keep the physical part of a relationship brand new. This is not to say that a virgin can't learn this stuff as she goes along, but it's just been my experience that they don't. The whole mindset is so ingrained that it's a difficult thing to let go of. I do like the fact that you are waiting for love though! If that were the only reason that you were waiting, I would agree 100%. Sex is great. Sex combined with love is fantastic!
2006-08-02 16:17:02 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
yeah good for you. A lot of people who have had sex will regret it one way or another. Its a fantastic feeling to be with someone like that, but there are som many risks involved by not waiting. No one has patience these days, for anything. A few generations ago, we would no that great things come to those who wait. Almost any "pleasure" is way better if you avoid instant gratification, and experience it the way it was meant to be. This can be said about not just sex, but saving money, eating healthy, and building life goals for yourself.
It often seems that the "moment of deliverence" will never come, but doesn't it always seem that right after weve given in, we realize what we were waiting for was just around the corner, and now we've ruined it. So just hold on and what love and life will bring to the table, instead of devouring the small things in front of you.
2006-08-02 16:11:18 · answer #4 · answered by patient z 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good for you! There will only be one first time and it should be a very special thing with someone who loves and cherishes you. There not only isn't anything wrong with you, you are to be congratulated for living your life the way you think is right.My only concern is why do so many people know about something so personal?Shouldn't be anyone's business unless it's a very close trusted friend, family, or your special guy. Stick to your guns and don't let anyone pressure you into doing something you're not ready for.Recreational sex isn't always a bad thing but it often leaves an empty feeling especially feeling the way you do. Virginity isn't a disease to be cured it's a gift to give someone you love.
2006-08-02 16:12:41 · answer #5 · answered by whnp 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, nowadays, it's basically a factor or religion on whether or not you want to wait to be married to have sex. Many people feel pressure to do it through friends, family, media, etc.
Really all depends on what you want. The age of the first time having sex is greatly rising, believe it or not. Now, this isn't to say that younger people are going at it, but the world is changing to where the majority of people are a tad older there first time.
Anyhow, my personal opinion is that unless you've got some strong moral, you should try sex atleast once while somewhat young - I hear it isn't as fun when older.
2006-08-02 16:30:14 · answer #6 · answered by Silver 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are doing wonderfully. you are one of a few that has some integrity. some human decency. In the not to distant future some decent guy that will never cheat on you will enter your life. and you will be glad you waited. he will respect you and love you the more for your waiting. i am a lot older than you but i wish i would have found a woman like you. good luck and stick with you feelings and do not let some guy talk you into something for his own pleasure and use you . continue on your path. also with an after thought. in todays world with HIV and Aids and everything. be smart and stay healthy. until the right man enters your life. you will know when it is time . you both will know when it is time.
2006-08-02 16:14:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am 26 and still a virgin. I also have not fallen in love yet and I also want to save myself for someone that I really care for and know that it will be for the long run. I don't think there is anything wrong with you and you shouldn't do anything that you feel is not right. A few people have told me that they wished they would have waited until they met someone they really cared about and they respect me for my decision. I hope this helps
2006-08-02 16:06:59 · answer #8 · answered by hippie_chick20 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, that's great! It shows that you have respect for yourself enough to not give in to the wrong people and wait for the right person! Don't worry about what others say, it's a very good thing. There's nothing bad about it. If you wait to be in love you will appreciate it more! Good Luck!
2006-08-02 16:07:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Girl please I wish I could say the same thing for myself. Don't be in a rush to do it because you really aren't missing anything out there. Save it for someone who really loves and appreciate you and if you come across men who won't wait...then they aren't the right ones. Even though I don't know you, I applaud you because in this overly sexed crazy society we live in...its really hard to find people who are still virgins...Good Job!
2006-08-02 16:05:24 · answer #10 · answered by luvhurts004 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
there is so nothin wrong with being virgin. I mean if you really care about someone you will wait till you are married to have sex. Im so sick of 2006 every1 just wants to have sex b4 they are even 18!!! Lifes no garden......dont be a hoe.
2006-08-02 16:05:31 · answer #11 · answered by Jenny 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋