grandchildren favoritism?

Question

i get the distinct feeling that my oldest son is the apple of all grandparents eye and my baby is second fiddle....thoughts on how to address it?

Answer 1

maybe you could drop off your baby at their house so they will have time to bond with that child. if that doesn't help, then I'd just tell them about it. as the kids get older, they will be able to tell who is the favorite and who isn't and that's no fun.

Answer 2

I've had a similar experience to this, although my circumstances are different. My partner is not the biological father of my child and when we first got together his mother had no grandchildren so my child was welcomed with open arms. However, since this time, his sister has had two children and my child has been completely pushed out by his mother. Unfortunately favouritism is a given, there will always be favouritism wherever there are families. The important thing is not to let it come between the children. If it bothers you that much i would suggest talking to whichever of the grandparents you are most comfortable with, and telling them how you feel. Even if it doesnt make them change the way they feel; it should make them change the way they act, which will make the situation easier on the new baby. Good luck

Answer 3

well i have a neice and two nephews and i have to say the oldest is my baby because i got to hold him when he was so tiny and rock him to sleep and i also had time to get to know him more then the other two because my sister moved to houston when he was 5 and the others where 2 and a newborn so i barely had a chance to get to know them....and it also feels really good to be a role model for a 6 year old when my life hasn't gone so well me and him are best friends...and there is nothing wrong with favoritism it comes naturally whether people like to admit it or not and just because me and the oldest get along doesn't mean i'm going to give him $500 and the other two $50 no i would never do that i would always treat them equally and love them just the same

Answer 4

I have that problem. Grandparents are always taking my oldest with them leaving the youngest behind. So for a few weeks everytime they called and asked for one child I pushed myself and the youngest one on them to. Made it clear where one goes we all go. I was afraid of letting them go alone that they would still favor the oldest. And at family gatherings or these times we all go together I make a point to sit the youngest down with them and make sure the oldest is busy doing something else, someplace else. I forced them to get to know there other grandbaby, and they finally did and things are fine now. They always take both now and kids seem to have a great time.

Answer 5

I went through the same thing. My 2 sons were always on the back burner. I never said anything through all those years.Mom and dad are in a better place now and all the kids are grwn.
This too will pass.

Answer 6

If your parents are old enough to be grandparents, they are probably too old to change, no matter how much you talked to them. If they give your oldest son money, make them give it to you first, then go home and split it equally. If they give him a gift, return it, and get two equal gifts instead.

Answer 7

Perhaps because there grandson has been around longer and they know him better, I would let them "babysit" your baby more often and this way give them the time and chance to get closer to your baby child!

Answer 8

I faced this and could only affect the situation to the extent of convincing them to not make unfavorable comparisons within the kids' hearing.

Answer 9

I know that it is hard to believe that your parents have preferences on another child. But, I always knew that my cousin Jody was the favorite of grandma. But, who cares, I mean you can give them all the love they need.

Answer 10

My advice is to let things go as they are. Give the Grands and your younger a chance to develop their relationships. You cannot control how others feel.