confused about me
confused about you
confused about love
and what to do ?
questions in my head ask
why is love so much pain? why does saddness come with rain?
why do
i always feel used
unaswered questions leave me still confused
2006-08-02 05:49:50 · 29 answers · asked by dedenumba1 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Yes it is.
2006-08-02 05:52:19 · answer #1 · answered by ABN 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My idea about a good poem is how you incorporate your senses with the way you feel because good imagery really makes your audience interested. It doesn't have to rhyme either. My style of poetry is to get the most emotion by using just a few words. Here's one of mine. People don't steal my idea..
It's called Guitar -
Strumming a familiar tune
Travels like a soft rain
Falling into my room
And while the rage
Spins inside my head
This small tune stays
quietly at first but
enters into this mess.
It's calming, chilling
With blue notes
playing with my
snarled, sweaty hair.
I stop my crying
And listen to the
Cool tune.
Now that's a visual... Keep writing, your on the right track.
2006-08-02 13:09:41 · answer #2 · answered by aliviakim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Poetry is about crafting with words, creating images that resonate, and expressing thoughts/feelings that are uniquely expressed. It's not just expressing emotion--whether real or not, trite or sincere--and you should definitely avoid forced rhyme. (Unless you want to write a greeting card or a bubble-gum pop-song.)
Go back to the drawing-board. Use specifics. Use sensory details. Paint images with your words. Then you might have something. (It also might help to read some really good poetry by really good poets: ee cummings, William Carlos Williams, Emily Dickinson, Christina Rosetti, Dorothy Parker, Langston Hughes, Nikki Giovanni, Lucille Clifton, Wallace Stevens, Anne Sexton, Robert Lowell, Christopher Smart, just to name a very few.)
2006-08-02 13:10:58 · answer #3 · answered by Mz.R. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes its a great poem its rhyme is good
but i would take out the question mark on the 4th line that says what to do because i think the phrase intends that you are confused about love and what to do in the future, you arent confused about love and asking what should i do
2006-08-02 12:55:43 · answer #4 · answered by shorty 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are on the right track! Personally I would change "sadness come with rain" to "sadness come with the rain". Keep writing!
2006-08-02 12:57:11 · answer #5 · answered by supersetter04 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, it's a good way to get your feelings out, but it sounds like one I posted on the internet a few weeks back though...
2006-08-02 12:56:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is a very good poem. if i was you i would put in on www.poerty.com they have contest and all there i think you should. i have some of mine on there if youd like to take a look at them also my name is sabrina witt. on there . keep writing and i want to have the first book if you ever decide to write one good luck you have a talent .
2006-08-02 13:04:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pretty good. Its good to express you emotion.
As for feeling used, make sure your love life is on your terms to begin with.
2006-08-02 12:54:33 · answer #8 · answered by gigglesticks 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good expressions of your thoughts. Work on your flow. Still good.
2006-08-02 12:53:48 · answer #9 · answered by intentionalmasterpiece 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is a good one and it is very true.
do you feel it that way now?
if so, just hang on and bear in mind that you still have your family and friends supporting and loving you.
God loves you...have a good day.
2006-08-02 12:56:02 · answer #10 · answered by lovelyshih 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think its grate
thats kind of how i feel too
dont wory
b happy
love will come soon
and the right guy too
2006-08-02 12:54:59 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋