Parents, how do you punish your children?

Question

do you spank them, ground them, or both and why. By the way, how do feel about spanking them. God bless you all.

I got spanked as a child and I turned out fine, so I don't see anything wrong with it....Pull Out The Belt! lol

Answer 1

I spank my kids. I only spank for certain things, however. I spank for lying, or willful disobedience. I also ground or take away privelleges when apporiate. I have very well behaved kids. I am always told how well behaved they are. They get spanked less and less as time goes by. In fact, I can't even remember the last time I spanked my kids. NEVER spank in anger. That is how it gets twisted. Spanking is a punishment, plain and simple. If you are angry walk away. Then explain to them the punishment. I think it is best for the kids to know upfront what consequences are for certain behaviors. My kids know they never have to get spanked. They are the ones choosing the bad behavior.

Answer 2

I was also spanked as a child and I am ok. Withmy 6yr old the punishment is given to fit the incident. She get spanked with a hand, stand in corner, lose tv time, lose sweets, and several others. I never spank with anything other than my hand.

My youngest who is 1, gets her hand smacked and she has learned to stand in the corner, from her older sister. (its the cutest thing, but she is getting the concept now, which is a good thing).

I feel there is nothing wrong with spanking, when done in moderation. Some parents take spanking to the extreme and that is not a good thing. Not all parents spank their kids to the point of abuse. My daughter understands that when she gets a spanking, she has done something really bad.

It is important for parents to know the line where it is considered abuse, once you know that, then spanking is ok. Spanking a child with a belt is considered abuse in most states. How can a parent judge if they are hitting the child to hard if they are using a belt? They can't. If you are using your hand, you know how hard you are hitting them.

Answer 3

I'm not a parent, but when I was younger, my parents spanked me with what they called the "trouble stick." It was the rubber covering on the handle of a golf club. OUCH!!! X-O
But I believe it was VERY effective and I haven't gotten a spanking since I was 6 or 7. Often I was grounded too, but I don't think that had a lot of effect. I was a pretty headstrong kid. Some kids need to be spanked; some don't.
My only problem is my mom- she has a very bad temper and often went overboard while spanking us. X-|
Spanking is OK, but make sure you have a darn good reason for it and like that woman said, NEVER do it in anger. When that happens, the only thing you do is make your kids scared of you, and later they'll resent you for it. I think my dad's spanking had far more effect in disciplining me and my siblings, because he was always controlled and gave us the fair amount of punishment. My mom's spankings, however, only told us to run away or hide whenever she was mad.
However, just to make one thing clear: She was never abusive. She lost her temper a lot, (still does) but believe me, it wasn't abuse.

Answer 4

I personally choose spanking over everything else when all else fails. With my kids a spanking followed by some corner time to think about what they have done usually works best, while sometimes a spanking and being sent to their rooms works even better.

I usually decide upon what's in order at the time, then follow through with my intent. I have no tollerance for a parent that constantly threatens a child with a spanking and never follows through with one. In my house if I say to someone, (your going to get a spanking), then they get a spanking. It's that simple.

My kids know that, and so do all of my nephews and nieces too.

Answer 5

I was spanked as a child, and I don't feel I was abused or anything, but never with a belt!
The offense is what determines the punishment in my house. I use a combination of loss of privileges, time outs in the corner standing, spanking, and loss of toys of the rest of the day. Mine are young, so I'm not grounding them, yet. They don't remember from one day to the next well enough until they are older.
Examples: They won't pick up their toys for lunch, they don't get to go to the park after lunch. They fight over a toy, the toy gets taken away for the rest of the day, and they go into the corner if they don't hand it over right away.
If you are a parent trying to figure out how to discipline your kid, then do what works for you and what feels right. Make sure the punishment fits the "crime" and never, never spank when you are angry.
I know it's the natural reaction, but anger makes us hit harder. Make sure you are calm and in control when you decide to spank. If I feel like I am loosing my temper (or have already lost it), they have to go sit on their beds out of site until I calm down. Then I will dish out what I think they deserve. I know by then it's a spanking, not a beating. I also feel like I am not teaching them to lash out when angry. I admit to yelling and stuff, I'm not perfect, but I hope that I'm showing them that while you can't stop your temper from surfacing, you can control what you do when it arises. My kids almost never hit eachother, and they haven't yet hit anyone on the playground. So I think I'm on the right track with my two!

Answer 6

I dont ever remember being spanked. I generally think its a bad idea. I have had many discussions with other parents and most agree that it depends on the child. If you do spank your child, I would think about it first. Talk to your child and explain why they are being punished. Then at least they know it is out of reason instead of anger.

Answer 7

You may think you turned out fine but perhaps you didn't. Studies show that spanking a child acutally lowers their I.Q. Perhaps you could have been a rocket scientist but because Daddy brought out the belt.....

We don't spank our kids. (we were both spanked as children). I know that our decision has been the best one although our parents have a hard time with it. We do ground them but we also try to work through the problems. (they are 6&7). For example, about a year ao my son took a pack of gum from the local grocery store. Later that day I saw him with it and took him to the store to confess. Since he had already opened it and couldn't return it, I asked the manager if he could work off his debt to the store. My son spend a very long hour sweeping the floor and passing our food samples to customers. The while while, his brother was home playing video games. It was torture and far more effective then spanking.

We also try to instill a since of civil responsiblity even in our young children. We feel that by teaching that they are active, contributing members of our society they will think about their actions and how they impact those around them. They know it's their job to stick up for the 'underdogs', to not litter our Earth, to study hard so that they one day might gain the knowledge to make a lasting Mark on the world.

They might be little, but they understand. They see us lead by example. We work hard, are always taking classes, always involved with their schools and teachers, volunteer our time and always put family first.

Leading by example, our children follow...What example do you set by hitting a defenseless child? What moral lesson are you teaching them?

Answer 8

When they were toddlers, they would get a gentle slap on the hand. As they got a little older, they would get a warning and a slap on the hand for lesser things, a warning and a swat on the tush for larger things. When they were 'bout 5, we gave them spankings for defiance. Since they were 7, they stopped getting spankings, and now lose privilages (such as staying up to 9:30 on weeknights/10 on weekends/11 on vacation, video games, TV, etc) and restrictions (same thing, but for a week or two at a time), but, now at 10 years old, it's a rarity we have to do that anymore... we just take away the video games when they fight, and then seperate them (one plays upstairs, the other downstairs).

Answer 9

I don't believe in "grounding", I never did spank. I set rules right from the beginning. The only "RIGHTS" the child has is food in their bellies, a roof over their heads and clothes on their backs. They do not have the right to a television, computer, telephone, stereo or video games. Those are privileges and in my home privileges were earned. If my daughter behaved she earned television time. If she continued behaving she earned either more television time or video games her choice. As it turns out now that she is 20 I never had to ground her nave had to spank her.

Answer 10

The BIBLE says....Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child: but, the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.........Proverbs 21: 15........in other words God is saying that it is ok to spank your children..not beat them..and also it will deliever their souls from HELL.......I spank/ground both of my kids. I am a single parent, so i'm both Mom/Dad...and i have been Blessed with 2 great kids. Goodluck and God Bless..........Always.......p/s....we are all God's children and he punish's us when we do wrong. and he won't hesitate to SPANK us .