like i said three and a half years and still no engagement ring got em a promise ring but think he just got me that so i would shut up
cause i want him to show me some kind of commentment. IS he just stalling time cause he doesnt really want to get married. Of course he was married before and his wife cheated on him with his best friend who she is married to now
2006-08-01 18:40:33 · 7 answers · asked by etta d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Well, from what you gave me, CAN YOU BLAME HIM? His wife, (probably 1st, if I'm not mistaken) cheated on him with his best friend! He's a little freaked out, not to mention the average male is a little freaked out by committment. So you have two things working against him. Are you good to him? Loyal? Prove these things true and he may very well have a ring for you. Talk it out with him. Good luck.
2006-08-01 18:46:20 · answer #1 · answered by jokerscard692000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People these days are staying in long term relationships, a lot more than ever before. Part of the reason is what you mentioned. A lot of people have had bad relationships in the past and don't want to get hitched, unless they're absolutely sure. Other people are just happy with the way things are and don't wish to change it. I think the best thing for you to do is talk to your boyfriend and see how he feels. I know it's a touchy subject and you don't want to scare him off, but he's been with you for 3.5 years. If you can't talk to him about marriage, then somethings wrong.
If marriage is something that you desire, than you'd be doing yourself an injustice by staying with someone that may not want that. Give yourself some peace of mind and talk to your man. If you've had a good relationship with him thus far, than he should be respectful & understanding of your feelings. Just be prepared, if his feelings aren't the same as yours. If it isn't, than that gives you something to think about and you can start making choices about your relationship. Good luck!
2006-08-02 01:59:00 · answer #2 · answered by mangosmoothie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He prob has fear from last time and is taken his time more so he knows when he does get married (if he wants to again), he won't make the same mistake by marrying a female who is a potentional cheater.
So, respect needs to be given on that and not nag him about it. He needs to be able to trust and be able to ready. He might still be healing from his ex wife's unfaithfulness. Wouldn't you?
However, you two seem like no talking as been done on exchanging of feelings.
By now you should know if he is thinking of future of marriage/kids or no marriage/ kids.
Ask him if he ever wants to get married again and if he is afraid of committment.
have to straight out ask to get answers. We can't speak on behalf of him since we don't know him.
If he doesn't committ and you feel as this isn't getting anywhere, time to think if this relationship is what you want.
2006-08-02 03:08:59 · answer #3 · answered by Mutchkin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what's the rush? my boyfriend and i have been going out for almost 5 years now. we talk about marriage and all that matters is that we know we're going to get married when the time is right. i don't have any ring. sure i would like to be "officially engaged" but just when we're both ready to have a wedding. meanwhile, just enjoy life before you're tied down. = )
2006-08-02 02:34:13 · answer #4 · answered by amino 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just give him sometime, he might need more time thinking how he might do it. I might sound dumb but my girlfriend and I are already engaged, we have only been going out a little less than 5 months. Well expect for him to get you an engagement ring, only if you think he would. (of course)
-Edward
2006-08-02 01:48:12 · answer #5 · answered by cursedconcept 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems once bitten, twice shy. You, may have a hard time getting your boyfriend to the altar.
All you can do, is talk to him about it, but after three and a half years, it may not happen.
If that's the case, then you may have to look else where for a husband. It all depends if you care to wait longer, on the chance that he will be secure enough with you, to pop the question.
If he thinks, he may lose you, that may push him to do it.
But you have to be prepared, that he may just tell you, he isn't ready, or ever will be.
2006-08-02 01:48:04 · answer #6 · answered by johnb693 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think if he doesn't ask you soon, you should move on.
2006-08-02 07:03:36 · answer #7 · answered by Lydia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋