Okay....so I tapped into my boyfriends yahoo instant messenger and spoke to a girl who he has apparently been cyber sexing with. His defense for this is that he talks with her how he wants to talk to me the ways he spoke to her. He was scared to tell me he had all these fantasies so he told them to her in their cyber sex conversations. I gave him ample opportunity all day to tell me about this by asking who this girl was. He avoided the truth until the absolute last possible minute. Help!!!! what does this mean????
2006-08-01 18:37:42 · 30 answers · asked by queenbx8403 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
oh yea...we have been together for almost 5 years....and for the one who said I was insecure...yes I am because he has done this before.
2006-08-01 18:53:17 · update #1
he is cheating..dump him...
2006-08-01 18:41:17 · answer #1 · answered by beth l 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my husband and I were dating, he did the same thing. I did consider it cheating, he told me basically the same thing. He also avoided telling me the truth for as long as possible, in reality I do think he was kind of embarrassed by it.
We talked about it, I promised to stop bringing it up and now he talks to me about it.
Sit him down and explain to him how you feel, make sure he understands that you want him to talk to you like that not other women.
We sorted things out and have a great relationship, that was 10 years ago.
Good luck.
2006-08-02 01:51:55 · answer #2 · answered by curls 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey i flirt with a guy on messenger and i have a boyfriend. It really doesn't mean anything as long as he isn't masturbating in front of her on webcam. Then that is crossing the line! It all depends on what is said...i mean i don't talk about sexual fantasies with this guy. I just tell him how sexy he is and he says the same bout me. That kind of stuff. Like I said it all depends on what is being said. I think it also depends on whether or not he plans on meeting her. If he has no intention of ever meeting her then you've got nothing to worry bout.
2006-08-02 01:47:59 · answer #3 · answered by Lindsay 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It means you need to let him feel secure that he can speak to YOU the way he spoke to HER, and then it should STOP. This is not cheating...it's more a form of counciling he came up with for himself so he could deal with this issue. He never acctually had sex with that chick, so no worries. Stop tripping, and give him the chance to be that way with you. It may be what's been missing from your guys' relationship all along. Good luck.
2006-08-02 01:43:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It probably means he really isnt that into you, because if he really honestly cared about you and respected you..he would not have done that. And I wish girls would stop buying that "he's just scared" crap..its so stupid. If a guy wants something, he knows how to ask for it. And a tip in the future, if you have to spy on your boyfriend..you should probably break up with him.
2006-08-02 01:45:24 · answer #5 · answered by Michelle H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i know this can be heard on you, your b/f may just have a high sex drive. if he dose that he probablly looks at porn to. most guys who have a sex drive thats high or are that horney proablly do alot of other things they shouldnt be doin. question him on his thoughts about the realtionship and about you if those are not the answes your lookin for, break up with him.
only a few people can pull this off, tell him that you found the porn websites he was on and before you say anything ask him if he's sorry and tht you'll forgive him if he seys sorry you know he did it if he seys what are you talkin about then say i was joking, if you do it right you can pull one of the funniest things ever
- joey
2006-08-02 01:49:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
not fully considered cheating- its like seeing a therapist. he's trying to get his feelings out in another way. since you have been together for five years now, i would consider this cyber crap as an opportunity to spice up the relationship.
2006-08-02 02:30:02 · answer #7 · answered by Reinalove. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it means he is having cyber $ex with someone else. some people consider that cheating some don't. make that decision yourself. you are obviously bothered by it. if there is a problem. tell him to talk to you like that instead of her and get rid of her.
2006-08-02 01:43:12 · answer #8 · answered by singitoutloudandclear 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is a perv who is a liar as well. If he wanted to talk to you that way he should of just been forward with you. He is wanting to see a naked girl on the internet. Has nothing to do with you at all he just is thinking with the wrong head.
2006-08-02 01:43:02 · answer #9 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a lot of people have sexual fantasies that they are afraid to bring up to their partner. If he did actually bring it up with you, and you like him... try it. If you dont like it...stop. The key is that he should stop. YES HE DID "CHEAT", but no I dont think this type of cheating is as bad as sleeping with another person. Now that you know about his fantasies, share one of yours. Try to get him to be more open about his, by exposing yourself to him. Good luck.
2006-08-02 01:43:25 · answer #10 · answered by the_thoughtless_ponderer 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's doing that, and avoiding your simple questions, who's to say he's not cheating anywhere else? Get out of the relationship.
2006-08-02 01:42:16 · answer #11 · answered by jokerscard692000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋