I have a 3 years old daughter, she screams and cries many times , also beats other children, what can I do?

Question

I can not stop her.

Answer 1

seek professional help.

Answer 2

There are a few facts all parents of difficult children should know.

1)Difficult Children are Normal. They are not emotionally disturbed, mentally ill or brain damaged. Difficult is very different than abnormal from a medical standpoint.

2)Difficult children are like this because of their innate makeup. We all have an inborn temperament. No one asks for certain traits, it is not their fault.

3)Difficult children are hard to raise.

4)Difficult children are NOT all the same. The temperament and traits will vary from child to child even within a family.

5)Difficult children make their parents feel angry, inadequate or guilty. And these feelings lead to ineffective discipline.

6)Difficult children can create marital strain, family discord, problems with siblings and end up with emotional problems of their own.

OR, OR, OR

7)Difficult children can become positive, enthusiastic, perhaps even especially creative individuals if they are well managed when young.


These are some quotes from Turecki's THE DIFFICULT CHILD- try to get it. It Will prove very helpful because there is no cookie cutter way to help kids with their issues. I am sorry that it is frustrating at times.

Answer 3

Is she worse when it's loud & chaotic? Does she react that way with people she knows & is comfortable with, or strangers?

My friend's son will be 3 next weekend, and after many problems with his day care for that type of behaviour, the day care called in a state specialist to see if there was some reason for causing it.

After lots of observation at home, at day care, 1 on 1, etc, they determined that he has a sensory issue that I can't fully explain. I don't really understand it. I do know that he seeks out ways to use his senses, like he feels compelled to touch, or scream, etc.

In situations where there are other people he doesn't know, he feels threatened, so he reacts more violently. With adults, he knows he's safe. At daycare, he's unable to predict how the other kids will react, so he's more protective of himself, in ways that include acting out against those kids. It can sometimes be linked with other problems, such as ADD, ADHD, & Autism, but not always.

Here are some symptoms:
Overly sensitive to touch, movement, sights, or sounds
Under reactive to touch, movement, sights, or sounds
Easily distracted
Social and/or emotional problems
Activity level that is unusually high or unusually low
Physical clumsiness or apparent carelessness
Impulsive, lacking in self control
Difficulty making transitions from one situation to another
Inability to unwind or calm self
Poor self concept
Delays in speech, language, or motor skills
Delays in academic achievement

Below is the website I got those from, which explains it far better than I can.

Answer 4

What ever you do don't raise your hand or hit her. Time out with her somewhere. She is irritable and acting out. Hitting and screaming does not rid of their irritability. Taken away from present surroundings to some other quiet place within the home with just the two of you . Just reassurance and stay by her side. Hopefully she will cry self to sleep. Hopefully you can persevere the tandrum. Cause may be over tired, low sugar or some other psychological problem (sibling rivalry or someother). Just tell yourself you love her and want her not harm self or others. Do the right thing - don't scold her. She's too young and doesn't understand why she's irritable.

Answer 5

My child was like this, I wondered for a very long time wether I was a good mother. My child is 5 now, and last year I finally took him to see a doctor, there was a possibility that he was adhd. Recently, I moved into a housing project where there is a lot of children. He was exposed to these children and learned many social skills that he didn't have before. He is also in daycare now. Before, I was so depressed, i was worried about him, worried that he may not have a normal life. His behaviour changed dramatically, and for the better. I am happy for him and happy with myself now.

Answer 6

You should take her to her Dr and find out if there is a medical condition that she my have. I don't think spanking or giving her time out will help, she is just a baby 3 years old. she needs to be checked out by her Dr, and maybe take her to library reading time or Sunday school. somewhere they are structured and she can learn how to behave around other children. All options should be sought before you punish a 3 year old for having problems like the ones you describe.sometimes children do it for attention. Maybe she needs more time with other children and learn how to get along with them without you there> preschool>Sunday school> reading time at your local library. Good luck to you!

Answer 7

punishment of unwanted may be merited......but try to focus on rewarding her good behavior.

1. FInd out what she likes and what would act as a good reward.....for example: a special toy, candy, time in front of the TV, a special acitivity......

2. Tell her that if is able to control her behavior for a specified period of time (you may want to start out with one minute and build up to longer durations) then she will get a reward.

3. The biggest reward for your daughter is YOU!!! and your time and attention!!!! Make sure that you are spending lots of time with her so that when she behave in an appropriate, healthy manner, you will be right there to lavish her with tons of attention, praise, hugs, and love!!!!

Answer 8

Discipline her! . . .and be a team with your spouse. You have to get things in your household together first. YOU are the parent and YOU have to set limits and STOP giving in to her every want just because she has a temper tantrum. Most parenting books say that you ignore the tantrums and reward positive behavior. You should watch "Nanny 911" sometimes.

Answer 9

Don't spoil her if you are and let her know you love her with patience and confidence because her life is in your hands . Show her by telling her no , she can't do that . Take away a privelege , but be careful which one because it can cause some nasty effects . Show her some ice cream and tell her if she wants some she will have to behave , and be firm with her

Answer 10

Have you tried punishment. Give her time out, no dessert, no TV etc. To reduce injury from her beating other children put soft puppets on her hands.

Answer 11

You asked...sounds like she need some serious discipline. I'm talking time outs, restrictions, loosing privileges (her favorite toy for an hour, no TV something she enjoys), I know spanking is an issue for a lot of people but it worked for me and my siblings....